Damn dude. I don't know if I'd even been able to stay with a girl after being told something like that. That would seriously fuck me up, and is one of my worst fears, to tell you the truth. I mean I'd be thinking that if every time we had sex was not as good as what she used to have, then what am I even doing there? I realize that there are other more significant parts of a relationship and that it is reasonable to assume that she probably has had better sex than me, but the last thing I'd want is to know about it. There are some things you just do not say to a guy, you know? How did you deal with your insecurity? If it was me, I'd be questioning every reaction every time we had sex and most likely not enjoy it anymore because of the anxiety.
Haha, well it's a long story, but in a nutshell: I knew her ex, we played soccer together & he was well known for being huge. But 20 years ago, because there was no internet & because I'd had success with previous gfs despite my small size, I assumed women orgasmed like men (one type of traditional orgasm) & because my gf is highly orgasmic, my size never worried me.
But over 20 years, several things have added up = she said she couldn't feel me when we first had sex but blamed herself as she got very wet; she said she was glad I was small because at least I didn't hurt her like her ex; & she once said: 'Please thrust hard & deep as I get vaginal orgasms from cul de sac contact'. I can't reach her cervix, let alone her cul de sac, so I realised she was talking about him. I joked about her ex's size, so she assumed I was completely secure with my size - which I was in the beginning.
I work with a SQ who told me 2 or so years ago that 'Many women lie about size not mattering because they don't want to hurt guy's feelings, but a large penis can give different orgasms & feels better if used well.' That was the point I started to worry - I searched the net, saw that that there's some truth to what the SQ said & my nagging insecurity got the better of me: I asked my gf whether this was true: she said yes; I stupidly, out of morbid curiosity and because not knowing was giving me a permanent knot in my stomach, asked her why. She said: more fullness, stretching, friction, contact with the cul de sac & much harder more intense orgasms, but then quickly said: 'But I'm in love with you so the emotional side of sex makes up for your size.'
That crushed me - even though I'd asked for the details! She backed off massively after that, trying to take back what she said, but I was fucked with insecurity & ultimately that led me to this site (ironically), which has helped me massively. I didn't want to go the SPH route, no disrespect, but I want to have confidence in what my cock can do rather than celebrate what it CAN'T do.
It's a work in progress!