Searching for Lady Luck

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by D_Badenyon_Corbarff, Dec 13, 2011.

  1. D_Badenyon_Corbarff

    D_Badenyon_Corbarff Account Disabled

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    So I have been going back and forth as to whether to post this on here or not. I will make it no secret that I am still a virgin looking for my girl. Anyways, I have just gotten back from my first semester of college and quite frankly, college life is a blast, but I just keep falling short with the ladies. I had all of these expectations of losing my virginity before college or at least before end of this year Just can't seem to win, I need help with the ladies, all advice would be great appreciated as I just keep feeling lonely and like I am missing something in my life. I find myself staying up late at night thinking about what it will take to get my girl, but nothing seems to work haha.
     
  2. _Jonesy

    _Jonesy Member

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    The worst thing you can do is put it on your mind - it makes it more difficult than it really is.

    Do you want her to be special or just anybody from a night out? If you want her to be special I'm still waiting for that as well :L

    If you want a one night thing just don't think, have a good time and you will attract someone. You probably already do every night, it is just acting on that fact that is difficult... all you can do is go for it. Worst that can happen is she says no.
     
  3. D_bbv12xcz

    D_bbv12xcz New Member

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    Jonesy is right about overthinking it. The feelings of loneliness, that something is missing in your life can definitely eat away at you and affect your success. The problem with a lot of guys is that they feel inadequate and try to use women as a source of validation, to fill a void in their lives. You need to remember that relationships are ultimately about sharing experiences, and we seek people to enrich our lives in various ways. If a woman senses that you feel empty and that she will become a "filler" for your emotional void, what would motivate her to want to be with you? What is she getting out of it? If you have things in your life you enjoy, that you are passionate about, and you can express yourself in a fun, interesting way, she will see that you can enrich her life and will want to share experiences with you.
    A nice resource I stumbled upon for dating was an e-book I think might be helpful to you called "Double Your Dating" by David DeAngelo. It goes in depth into the beliefs and mindset you should cultivate when interacting and socializing with women. If nothing else, it can offer a new perspective into the mechanics of attraction and interaction with members of the opposite sex. When I read this book I realized that there were core beliefs, some I already had, that affected my success.
    I'd suggest trying to be more fun, outgoing, passionate, and focusing less on trying to "get the girl". Anyone would choose someone they could see themelves having fun with over someone who seems needy any day. Also, look up that e-book, it could help.
     
  4. _Jonesy

    _Jonesy Member

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    BlkArts I'll be reading that, it sounds really good.

    You need to love yourself before you can love others. Or... you need to love yourself before you know how to make another feel loved.
     
  5. D_bbv12xcz

    D_bbv12xcz New Member

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    That saying is so accurate and a lot of people forget that. All the self-loathing and self-hate we carry around will only hurt us in the long run.
    Good luck with the book, by the way. He has since written other e-books that expand on his ideas about dating that are interesting. I feel a lot of guys can find the material useful because it really goes into the heart of what socializing and communicating is all about, since so many are so dead-set on "getting the girls".
     
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