Secret Crush on Best Friend

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by sfniceguy, Jan 26, 2010.

  1. sfniceguy

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    Did anyone while growing up, ever have a secret crush on a best friend, but couldn't reveal it because you were closeted at the time?
     
  2. the_reverend

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    i've had plenty of secret crushes on best friends...only most of my best friends growing up (and to this day) are of the opposite sex, and i've never been closeted. and i suck at keeping secrets of my own for long, so they didn't stay secret crushes too long. but other than that, same thing. :p
     
  3. craig_uk

    craig_uk Member

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    A lot of guys had crushes on close friends growing up. I suspect the main reason that it doesn't get revealed is that the feelings are not reciprocated. Most people realise that, if it is acted upon, it will almost certainly destroy their currently close and rewarding friendship.
     
  4. Roff

    Roff New Member

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    Yeah I have a crush on my best friend right now :-/

    He's definitely gay too, he just can't accept it :(
     
  5. B_Lightkeeper

    B_Lightkeeper New Member

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    Yes...more than one. While I was in high school (maybe my senior year), a guy from Kansas came to work in my home town for the summer. We because friends and double dated (females) occasionally. I don't want to sound like a "stalker" but many times I would sit in my car a block away and wait and watch until he got home. I'd crank up then and go to my house.

    I know this is weird. BTW, I never saw his cock even though we both went together down to Panama City, FL one weekend.

    I occasionally still think about him.
     
  6. Gedackt8

    Gedackt8 New Member

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    That's a familiar feeling! I've been friends with a guy for almost ten years and he hasn't accepted himself yet, even though he keeps saying how I should live closer/share an apartment with him, etc......
     
  7. Countryguy63

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    I have a crush on my best friend now :wink:.The best thing is, he has a crush on me too :biggrin1:. :heart:


    When I was younger, I had a couple of crushes on good or best friends and never let them know. The friendship was far more important.
     
  8. lvsxy808

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    Oh god, of course I did. I think it's a standard gay teen rite of passage - every one of us goes through it.

    Mine was the school jock who was actually surprisingly sensitive inside. Of course, I felt like I was the only one who could see that in him. We developed a bromance that was a lot more heartfelt on my side than the other. We actually decided to ditch our senior prom together and go out for a boys' night on the town. So I effectively considered him my prom date. And then when he had a family emergency and had to cancel, I was absolutely heartbroken.

    I wasn't officially out at the time, but to be honest I was still pretty obvious nevertheless. He must have been pretty dumb not to notice anything odd in my behaviour or reactions. In fact, one time, a girl he was dating actually cornered me and asked me what the hell was my problem with her. I answered, "He was mine and you stole him from me." My other best friend (not the one I had a crush on) followed up with, "Well... I never expected you to actually be that straightforward."

    Years later, he's straight and married and fat. I did also discover though that another school friend of mine, who I had no idea was gay at the time (too caught up in my own shit), also had the biggest crush on the guy and had effectively considered me stealing him from him.
     
  9. rangisrovus19

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    I had an extremely similar experience. Minus the prom and married thing. Weeeeiiiirrrddd!
     
  10. helgaleena

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    Yes. I also lost friends that way. This happens.
     
  11. Harold81

    Harold81 Member

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    This was precisely the case with me as well as most others here I would suspect. My attraction to a friend was so intense I did come awfully close to telling him, but I knew that would have changed everything and the thought of him rejecting me, even as just a friend, was something I wasn't willing to risk at the time.
     
  12. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

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    I've had some friends, both girls and guys, who had crushes on me. Eventually they told me which I was fucking flattered by. One guy couldn't deal with it and stopped being my friend but with the others we were able to work things out.
     
  13. cdog204

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    Why would a trip to the White Trash Riviera have anything to do with seeing his cock?
     
  14. margo18

    margo18 New Member

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    Yeah i have, and im still trying to get over it lol Im almost there but not completly i guess...


    Ive never really fell for a guy before though before him, otherwise I usually just fall for girls, but he was different. And he was the School jock, played football and the whole school was in love with that boy hahaha. He played Guitar and also had a really great singing voice, that mixed with he was really funny and the buffest guy at our huge school, everyone was obsessed with him.

    and we have a bromance, even to this day. and i got mixed feelings a lot as to if he felt the same for me back. One day i was even so bold to text him how i felt for him and if he felt the same way. He kinda flipped out, but handled it really well considering this is High School after all. And just kinda said he Just saw me as a bestfriend or a brother, and nothing more.

    I still wonder how he honestly feels because actions speak louder than words and his actions spoke LOUD. Like it was like we were in a relationship except..."not".

    And it sucks cause it feels so right to you, and then to them they might just see you as a friend even though it feels all the signs are there. Im just glad i was brave enough to admit these feelings to him instead of wondering forever "What If." Of course after he denied me, the next day i acted like i was going through a lot (which i actually was) and that i didnt know what i was thinking. I must have been on something and i dont like you like that either lol.

    We still keep in contact, but he moved away to college, but i always wonder about that boy, and if maybe in a different world....

    Just happy to hear im not the ONLY one whos had a crush on their bestfriend.
     
  15. B_jeepguy2

    B_jeepguy2 New Member

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    I had the same deal in High school. There was my best buddy Clay who was a tall, blonde, played football and had a body like a statue of a Greek god. I used to jack off thinking about having sex with him damn near every night when i was in high school. Then there was this other friend Jeff who was about my height but had a totally HOT body. I used to fantasize about him too. I hadn't seen either of them in damn near 20 years because we went off to different colleges after we graduated in 1991 but both of them recenty friended me on facebook. Clay now has mostly gray hair, a beer belly, and is married with three kids. Jeff is obese...and not jst a little obese either.

    Then there was Karen, the homecoming queen. This chick was the stuff wet dreams were made of circa 1989. I and damn near every other guy in my high school fantasized about fucking this chick because she had it all. She was blonde, hot, and drove a brand new T-top Camero and according to rumors I heard was awesome in bed...but I never found out about that first hand because I was a skinny geeky kid with braces and she would not even talk to me much less sleep with me.

    So one day last Summer I was home visiting my folks and mom sent me to the grocery store to pick up some stuff for a family cookout and as i was walking down the isle by the beer case I hear a familiar voice exclaim OHHHHHHH ROB, I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SOOOOOOO LONG! But the person does not look familiar. She is this FAT, UGLY, BEAST of a woman. Suddenly she grabs me, hugs me like I am her long lost lover, and meanwhile I am thinking who the fuck are you? How do you know me? Then I remembered the voice, It was Karen...the 1989 homecoming queen!

    I have found that when you see people you thought were hot in high school or college years later it is usually soooo fucking depressing!
     
    #15 B_jeepguy2, Jan 31, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 31, 2010
  16. exwhyzee

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    Absolutely. Met him in 9th grade at the beginning of the school year when we shared Latin and English History class. Quickly became friends. I was a boarding student and he was a day student, so I was invited to spend weekends at his family's farm. By late Fall I was hooked. That was a lot to deal with...realizing I had an intense attraction to a same-sex friend, and the fact that he did not feel the same way about me. He traveled 400 miles to visit me during summer break, we never fooled around, I was too chicken to make a move. I recall he admitted to having a wet dream the last night of his visit (while sleeping in the bed next to mine). Very confusing.

    I muddled through it for a year, and as he began to date girls - I just couldn't take being around him anymore. I let him have his girls and I recused myself. That was really hard to do...but I reasoned he was better off without me in his life (and I was better off not being tortured). My feelings for him never diminished though, and after a few months of not speaking, I finally opened back up after Spring Break in 11th grade. We remained friends through our last year in high school and into college. I probably remained too connected to him in college...too many letters, too many phone calls. There was no way he could keep up demand with all the attention I wanted from him. Again, I felt like a distraction and that I was beating my head against a wall, so I withdrew.

    After college he quickly got engaged to a girl he met there (I still have the letters where he complained how she was so manipulative and possessive). Again, very hard to take and I backed off. A few years later he invited me to his wedding, and though it was really hard...I was there. I tried to stay in contact after they got married but she kept him on a short leash, making him feel guilty whenever he left her to visit me for a weekend. Once they started having kids, contact ended except for Christmas cards and class reunions in his hometown. I still get Christmas cards. I still find it hard to see him during class reunions.

    I've thought about telling him that I have had a crush on him, but why? At this point it would do no good for either of us. I wish the best for him...he really loves his kids and in that aspect he has a great life.
     
  17. B_jeepguy2

    B_jeepguy2 New Member

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    Does he know that you are gay?
     
  18. D_Cateryke Cheesysmell

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    I've crushed on female friends before in high school, mostly we stayed friends, one time we got even friendlier
     
  19. exwhyzee

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    He does...in fact, he was the first person I ever came "out" to...around the time he had his first kid.
     
  20. CUBE

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    I pretty much had my own version of this in college. The pain was unbearable. He understood and did loved me in his own way, but of course he was straight. My partner and I still see he and his wife on occassion. I am fine but know limited exposure to him keeps things in check.
     
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