Seeing people you know on hookup sites...

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I actually wish this would happen to me. I'm on a few sites, and hoping to see a guy I know and find attractive. This would let me know that they are open to the idea of hooking up with another guy.

As for being homophobic, guys who are usually are over compensating. It's no secret.
 

maroon1040

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Yes, but I too say nothing. When CL had personals, I saw several people I see in public around town and the nearby bigger city in the ads for both m4m and even m4f as I'd look there out of curiosity to see who else is looking even if he isn't open to bi guys. Definitely interesting to see this side of people I wouldn't see whether we don't cross paths that way or even in some cases where it isn't possible to avoid conflicts in my profession if we have things/ interests in common that could make things awkward. A few people's profiles I've seen include:

The local mall security guard constantly reposting ad for a woman. He's a few years older than me, has other gig as a martial arts instructor, but given that it's country livin', sometimes it's slim pickings no matter whether you are a man or woman or gay or straight, etc.

A former Sears appliances sales guy who I'd see working the floor at the bigger city mall. He's gay and would post pics either partial bod shots and sometimes face pic. Not too bad looking tall thin white guy in late 20s but his interests and preferences doesn't match me, so definitely no reason to chat. But I would go through store from parking lot to mall stores and would see him talking to customers and would laugh to self knowing I saw his cock pics in his racy ad shots. Also about 7 and trimmed beneath those Dockers. Ha ha.

The coffee shop barista in m4m section. He's openly effeminate and gay (so I thought) and in earlier years advertised in m4m BUT also (before personals disconnected) advertised seeking a woman for oral pleasure fantasy, so either he's bi or expanding horizons. I see him during caffeine fixes to this day so I definitely don't want to say anything about seeing his ad... And package. He's about my age and has kept twink shorter build and is definitely LPSG material with about a 7 incher in his casual encounter ads.

And we'll see if the same goes with othera app and ad opportunities in this post-CL personal ads era. :)
 

Richard Licks

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Have you unexpectedly seen someone you know on a hookup site? porn site? How did you react?

Last night I decided to join one of those hookup sites to see what they're all about. Wasn't too excited about it at all and got a few messages by morning. I wasn't really interested in any of the guys at all but thought I'd play along.

I get home from work and log in again. Checked my messages, blah blah hi whatever blah blah. Then I go to browse the members. I thought, "Hmmm it's ____'s facebook profile photo". Did a double take... to make sure it's him.... then to make sure I'm in the right browser tab ... looked at the username (match!)... finally again back at the photo. It's him! Freaked out, I logged out immediately.

I'm shocked! Flustered! Flabbergasted! I didn't even THINK he'd be on a site like that. I suspected he might be gay/curious, heck we even had an incident, but I always gave him the benefit of the doubt. I didn't want to make assumptions. We hang out regularly and we both knew each other for most of our lives.... I'm not sure how things will change if I confront him. What to do?! I'm going to need time for this to sink in.
You were on the same site as he was so you both are interested in the same thing. Take your time, you both might become closer friends. Keep going to your hook up site. Sooner or later he will see you there and then you can communicate privately.
 

Richard Licks

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I find it best not to mix my cruising life with my personal life (work, friends, family,neighbours). I have run into people I know from work and socially on the online sites as well as in sex clubs. Online, I ignore them and make sure to remove any tracks (if possible), so not to make them think they're being stalked. I let them make contact with me if they chose, but I never initiate it. In person if I see someone I know when cruising, once it's apparent you recognise each other, I give a little nod and smile just to put them at ease. Sometimes, they chat, sometimes they don't. I leave the decision up to them. I am especially careful with work colleagues, and I stay clear as much as possible. That's my livelihood, and why potentially compromise it any capacity?

Basically my philosophy on this is "Don't shit on your own doorstep", and it's served me well over the years.
You notice a dog never shits in his on yard. When you shit in your own yard (work) you end up stepping in it (trouble).
 

LilBigWang

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Have you unexpectedly seen someone you know on a hookup site? porn site? How did you react?

I'm shocked! Flustered! Flabbergasted! I didn't even THINK he'd be on a site like that. I suspected he might be gay/curious, heck we even had an incident, but I always gave him the benefit of the doubt. I didn't want to make assumptions. We hang out regularly and we both knew each other for most of our lives.... I'm not sure how things will change if I confront him. What to do?! I'm going to need time for this to sink in.

Do you have your face pic on the site? How would he know it is you? why are you so nervous?

This happened to me recently. I have my face pic on grindr, and i have sunglasses on. I have found out about 3 people, some i seen myself and verified with pics but i did not want to reach out to them, i left them alone. One friend reached out to me and said "hi, i did not know you were fam, i'm so glad to see you here. Lets chat soon" That made me feel comfortable, I already knew who he was and responded with Hi D....., yeah lets chill soon. He replied with "how did you know it was me?" i just said i knew all along. I'm sure others have seen me on there, but have not contacted me.

I would send a message, and say something like, "hi, this is Oscar. Nice to see you on here man, what a nice surprise. Lets have a beer soon, happy hunting!"
 
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maroon1040

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Other close call/ "wow it's a small world" moments I experienced with CL personal ads include these run-ins with these guys who replied to my ads.

A guy who is the son of a senior official at my work organization responded, which caught me off guard considering he was married and had grown children and did not set off any gaydar vibes to me in the few times we crossed paths informally. The email responders name was same as the son's and the physical description of his stats matched the guy's... Mid 40s, tall average dad bod, same ethnicity with long hair (he is a classic rock music fan and cover band performer for hobby) and lived in the same part of town the father resides in. Fortunately I was able to put all that together and did not respond to him any further to avoid an obvious awkward situation.

And there was the guy who ran for office that I mentioned in a previous post. He was late 40s at the time and responded to my ad with personal email showing his name. He also listed his stats and even enclosed a cock pic. I knew of him because he comes from one of the area's well known families and they own a few small businesses the locals know and we would nod and say hi to each other in passing during lunch hours whenever we would be at same restaurants with our own coworkers/ clients. He was a nice guy and was openly gay so I wasn't surprised he was on CL, but also believed it would be awkward at least for me if we did meet. So I did not respond further to him but never forgot that experience for the next few years we occasionally saw each other. Sadly he passed away from cancer about two years ago, but I do see his children on occasion in passing at work functions. He had two children close to my age in his younger years and they now work for two entities connected to my work organization. Ah, the small world connections we run into living in the Midwest. CL has taught me a lot about people in those interactions I had whether they're good, bad or stayed at email replies.
 

Beelzebub

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Was looking at POF at work with a single friend of mine, saw this really attractive blonde.i told him you should message her, he didn't. Fast forward a few months we were playing a gig at a local bar, I play bass and only sing one or two songs myself as I really hate singing, not that I'm bad. This woman comes up to me at a break and tells me she really liked my singing and I should sing more. Either she thought I was good or our singer isn't that good or maybe she wanted to meet me. She hung around and made a bunch more small talk. I realized I wasn't wearing my wedding ring as it bugs me when playing. I then realized that this was the woman from POF that I thought was really attractive, she was if anything more attractive in person. I politely excused myself as I am happily married. Had a laugh at work the next week with my friend who was afraid to message her.
 

newcastlebrown

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On two occasions I was checking out sites with two friends. POF with a female friend and we came across a work colleague and also an ex of hers. I told her to message him for a bonus shag haha.
Then at a BBQ a bunch of m8s were checking out Tindr and while swiping through one lads saved pics another lad said hang on I've been seeing her. Turned at they had both been shagging the same lass for a month.
 

IntactMale

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A couple years after I graduated high school I saw the picture of a girl who was a year behind me in high school on Adult Friend Finder. I wasn't attracted to her, but seeing her on the website talking about she what she was interested in was kind of cool and got me a little interested. I sent her a message but my profile was blank, I didn't even have a picture up, and I never got a response.
 
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