Self-conscious of my size in the pool showers

Elki

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Hey everyone- I've been trying to start swimming. Since I'm a chubby guy and it's the only sport I like it seemed to be the best option, the only issue is the showers. Besides being a bit fat and dealing with backne (went to the dermathologyst for this and I'm getting treated, so hopefully it'll be over soon) I don't think I have a big penis, I haven't measured it in awhile but last time it was about 13cm erect and not that much flattering when flaccid.

Does anyone have any advice on this? I would really like to start swimming to get my mind off things and get active to improve my body since the gym wasn't for me, but this really is making it difficult to me. I know most likely no one will pay attention to me, but I can't help to be self-conscious about it.
 

aliuel

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Not sure how small you are soft, but I’d be surprised if you were as small as me (under an inch) so here’s some first hand advice:

Most people won’t notice, those that do won’t care.

The worst you will get will be a quick glance from a better hung guy but so what?
 

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My only advice is to just be self conscious for a while.

The world isn't perfect, a lot of us are self conscious and anxious just going to work or the grocery store, but it's always better to do those things.

No reason to stress or wait until it magically disappears, just go for it and feel weird the first few times if need be, but once it's a habit your body will not care as much.
 

BigMacattack

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I have keloid scars on my chest and I was self conscious about the lockerroom too. I still hold my towel and body wash over my chest when walking to the showers (cubicles) but I have also stood completely naked at my locker while putting on lotion, deodorant and cologne. I agree with everyone else. Nobody really cares. Do what makes you feel comfortable.
 

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Hey everyone- I've been trying to start swimming. Since I'm a chubby guy and it's the only sport I like it seemed to be the best option, the only issue is the showers. Besides being a bit fat and dealing with backne (went to the dermathologyst for this and I'm getting treated, so hopefully it'll be over soon) I don't think I have a big penis, I haven't measured it in awhile but last time it was about 13cm erect and not that much flattering when flaccid.

Does anyone have any advice on this? I would really like to start swimming to get my mind off things and get active to improve my body since the gym wasn't for me, but this really is making it difficult to me. I know most likely no one will pay attention to me, but I can't help to be self-conscious about it.
Lifes to short, have been through the same scenario and at 66 have done just fine so live your life and enjoy, swimming is supposed to be one of the best types of exercise. FYI once I lost weight, I somewhat gained a new friend, my penis hard got bigger because the pad above got smaller. It still didn't change the flaccid state but it was nice to stroke when I was harder!
 

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Was in the sauna after a swim at the local Y , had left the suit outside, sitting on a towel . I never considered myself a "great "swimmer let alone a "good" one , but I kept at it . Always admired the guy in the fast lane , heard him say one time he was training for an Ironman competition . He came into the sauna , only comment he said was "you are getting better " , so obviously he had also noticed me . We had never spoken before . At that moment it didn't matter that I was small flaccid , he was complimenting me on my progress swimming . Have never forgot this
 

HOU_HEADHUNTER

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If it bothers you that much then I'd say wear black or dark trunks so that nothing is visible. Until you lose weight you may have an issue with showering nude so just do as some others do and shower in your trunks. As you lose weight you will gain confidence.
 

Stokebigdick

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I'm 8.5 and when I was younger, I remember being picked on by a random who said I was tiny etc. Was taken a back and was really self conscious after, a few weeks later saw him again and he was getting changed and his friend ripped the towel from his hands and his dick was tiny, he looked at me and went so red I thought his head was gonna explode.

Point is there is always someone that's a dick in attitude but is only vocal because they are insecure and need to feel better by putting someone else down.

Also, most people in gyms, swimming baths etc just want to get changed as quickly as possible and aren't looking, and the whole stare and it turns you gay!

You need to force your self into that situation, after a few times you will be confident and won't care. There is always someone bigger in build and smaller in dick and it doesn't matter.

You are totally normal

As for your back, drink loads of water, and get some sun or a sunbed once a week, it's not going to give you cancer, that happens if you go everyday and have like 20 minutes a time for years.


3-6 minutes once it twice a week, will help dry your skin a bit and the spots will go.
 

swimbrief

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I swim quite a bit and shower afterwards. I get severe shrinkage and I'm a grower at the best of times, so I understand the anxiety of being in the showers.

Here are a few things I've learned:
  • lots of small to average guys don't use the showers because they're embarrassed, while lots of above average guys do use the showers because they're not. That means the showers are really unrepresentative of what's normal
  • you can help with that by representing normal guys. I know that by being small/average and showering nude, other guys who had planned to keep their trunks on took a glance at me and thought, hey, if he's not packing and he can shower nude, so can I, and stripped off their trunks. That's a nice feeling, even if there is someone else in there showering with you both showing off a 9" weapon.
  • most guys who use showers don't really care about who else is in there, and I have never seen anyone make any remark or do anything unkind to anyone else, so the negativity is all in your head
  • at the same time, everyone looks, and some look more than others. They're not looking out of any kind of meanness, they're just looking out of curiosity. Sometimes they're gay and they find it erotic in which case you being naked in the shower is turning them on - good for you!
  • if you are intimidated, take your time and don't rush, otherwise it'll make you more stressed. Try and enjoy getting clean and practice getting comfortable being nude around other guys. Breathe!
No-one should be allowed to feel intimidated out of taking a shower, especially since chlorine is nasty and you need to wash that stuff off. The more you shower, the easier it gets, and the more you swim the better shape you'll get into, and the more comfortable you'll be, so it's a virtuous circle.

Go for it, man. People like me are on your side in the showers!
 

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I swim quite a bit and shower afterwards. I get severe shrinkage and I'm a grower at the best of times, so I understand the anxiety of being in the showers.

Here are a few things I've learned:
  • lots of small to average guys don't use the showers because they're embarrassed, while lots of above average guys do use the showers because they're not. That means the showers are really unrepresentative of what's normal
Forgive the edit. Based purely on my own experience (which is extensive: I'm getting on a bit nowadays,) men don't self-segregate based on appearance when it comes to hitting the showers - and that goes for physique as much as cock size. Willingness to strip off seems to be based entirely on body confidence, which is a bit more complex and encompasses some men's irrational terror of being seen naked (which can afflict ripped and well endowed guys just as much as the polar opposite,) the old chestnut of being afraid of getting aroused, and certain cultural and religious taboos, as much as worries about appearance.

My current gym, for example, has a lot of drive home sweaty types, but of those who do shower there doesn't seem to be a particular bias by age, there certainly isn't one by fitness level, and the cohort of users doesn't consist predominantly of men with big willies either. It's just a selection of mostly pretty average blokes getting clean, really.
 

swimbrief

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Forgive the edit. Based purely on my own experience (which is extensive: I'm getting on a bit nowadays,) men don't self-segregate based on appearance when it comes to hitting the showers - and that goes for physique as much as cock size. Willingness to strip off seems to be based entirely on body confidence, which is a bit more complex and encompasses some men's irrational terror of being seen naked (which can afflict ripped and well endowed guys just as much as the polar opposite,) the old chestnut of being afraid of getting aroused, and certain cultural and religious taboos, as much as worries about appearance.

My current gym, for example, has a lot of drive home sweaty types, but of those who do shower there doesn't seem to be a particular bias by age, there certainly isn't one by fitness level, and the cohort of users doesn't consist predominantly of men with big willies either. It's just a selection of mostly pretty average blokes getting clean, really.
Your gym sounds very different from my pool! :cool:
 
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HOU_HEADHUNTER

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Forgive the edit. Based purely on my own experience (which is extensive: I'm getting on a bit nowadays,) men don't self-segregate based on appearance when it comes to hitting the showers - and that goes for physique as much as cock size. Willingness to strip off seems to be based entirely on body confidence, which is a bit more complex and encompasses some men's irrational terror of being seen naked (which can afflict ripped and well endowed guys just as much as the polar opposite,) the old chestnut of being afraid of getting aroused, and certain cultural and religious taboos, as much as worries about appearance.

My current gym, for example, has a lot of drive home sweaty types, but of those who do shower there doesn't seem to be a particular bias by age, there certainly isn't one by fitness level, and the cohort of users doesn't consist predominantly of men with big willies either. It's just a selection of mostly pretty average blokes getting clean, really.
This sounds pretty accurate to how it is at my gym. I've made my own observations about some of the guys that are always in the locker room for a shower aren't ever seen on the gym floor working out. Come to find out my gym gets a lot of homeless who are living in their vans or living off of the grid as they would call it. The guy that works at my gyms says he'll see people come in just to shower and they will never even go to workout but will shower and leave. I guess paying 30 bucks a month just to have access to a shower isn't too bad but that would also explain some aspect of the who and why of it.
 
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Elki

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Hey guys! Thanks for all the advice and kind words. I haven't started to swim yet, mostly because of what's on this thread. However, I've given thought of what you said, specially the one that told me it's a cicle where I'll just be embarassed at the beginning until I get better with my body and whatnot. Also to the guy that told me to bathe in underwear, I think I'm gonna be following your advice specifically.

I get that most likely nobody will notice I'm there, but that's just not how my brain works. Also having long hair, which will make it so I have to spend more time in the shower, doesn't really help that thought.

I'll try to start to swim next month, since paying november fully when it's almost done sounds dumb. I'll be sure to comeback and read what you said when december starts as a motivation and so I get the balls to do it. I'll also come back and let you know if I finally do it.

Overall, thanks!
 

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Good luck and keep us posted! Swimming is awesome and so worth doing!
I know! It's the only sport I ever did and liked as a kid, but I had to let it go due to health complications (severe otitis everytime I swimmed) now that I'm older I'm hoping to be able to withstand the pain or find other solution if it's too much, but I want to exercise and this seems like the right one
 

Elki

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I'm 8.5 and when I was younger, I remember being picked on by a random who said I was tiny etc. Was taken a back and was really self conscious after, a few weeks later saw him again and he was getting changed and his friend ripped the towel from his hands and his dick was tiny, he looked at me and went so red I thought his head was gonna explode.

Point is there is always someone that's a dick in attitude but is only vocal because they are insecure and need to feel better by putting someone else down.

Also, most people in gyms, swimming baths etc just want to get changed as quickly as possible and aren't looking, and the whole stare and it turns you gay!

You need to force your self into that situation, after a few times you will be confident and won't care. There is always someone bigger in build and smaller in dick and it doesn't matter.

You are totally normal

As for your back, drink loads of water, and get some sun or a sunbed once a week, it's not going to give you cancer, that happens if you go everyday and have like 20 minutes a time for years.


3-6 minutes once it twice a week, will help dry your skin a bit and the spots will go.
Also, I wanted to tell you that I will follow your advice to get some sun on my back from time to time. Since I'm a bit dumb I also don't take my shirt off in my own house (I still live with my family and WFH) But I've been thinking for awhile that since I swear quite a lot and don't get any sun on my back that I could be related. So I'll try it for sure. Thanks