serious medical question for bottoms who have xxl hung boyfriends

Discussion in 'Sex With a Large Penis' started by wristthickxl, Sep 12, 2008.

  1. wristthickxl

    wristthickxl Active Member

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    Hi guys,

    I have a serious inquiry that I hope will get some responses....I'd appreciate serious answers only as this isn't a laughing matter..

    I've been seeing a guy sexually for a little more than a year now and care about him alot. Besides all of his other great qualities, he is one of the few men who has been able to anally take my penis (a real 7 inches around, not Internet inches) for as long as I like to give it...

    Unfortunately, he, after the first few months, started developing, for lack of a better word, some anal seepage or leakage...commencing the following morning after we have sex.

    He went to a physical therapist about this and when he told her the size of my penis, she said she thought that that was probably the cause. He and I were hoping it was something else (kind of lube used, the positions we have sex in, etc.) We tried all kinds of lubes, positions, etc but the outcome is the same (he feels a small amount of liquid seeping from his behind and an unpleasant odor...he feels then, naturally, embarassed in front of colleagues).

    I was away for two months and, thus, we did not have sex. The problem all but disappeared. Now I am back and we have had sex only twice (in the last few days) and he is having these problems again.

    MY QUESTION to both bottoms who have xxl hung boyfriends or sex partners or even the tops who are xxl hung (and by that I mean also very wide and fat): have you come across this problem and if so, was there any kind of solution?

    I would appreciate any feedback. I don't know where else to turn.
     
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  2. B_hardasarokkk

    B_hardasarokkk New Member

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    Get a new BF that can handle a bit of cock man!

    :biggrin1:Mike:biggrin1:
     
  3. badger2395

    badger2395 Member

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    Exercise. Specifically Kegel exercises and the like. The anus has a set of muscles, and while they need to relax to allow a thick guy like you they can also be strengthened and worked to be in better shape. Once your bf starts that, he should be able to avoid the problem of leakage.
     
  4. B_cigarbabe

    B_cigarbabe New Member

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    I'm sorry for the problems you and your lover are having W.T..
    I was going to also suggest he try doing Kegels every day, several times a day
    to help alleviate this problem.
    Ignore the moron who posted above badger.
    Would'nt seeing a proctologist who was gay friendly be able to help?
    Good luck to you both.
    cigarbabe:saevil:
     
  5. Bongo7

    Verified Gold Member

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    It's called anal incontinence. After a while of "fisting" him with your monster on a regular basis, did you not think he would eventually "loosen up?" If you continue regular anal sex, the problem will probably become worse. Also, don't count on kegels saving the day. It is highly likely that you stretching his ass regularly will outpace what he can do with kegel exercises to keep up. I would try to cut back to anal sex every two weeks and see if letting him "bounce back" a little more helps.
     
  6. rover86

    rover86 New Member

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    fucking gross. anal leakage before i have my coffee? no thanks.

    my ex was 10x6.5(ish) and my ass stayed tight, and leak-free.

    maybe he needs a tampon?
     
  7. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Maybe you need a huge tampon to shut your inconsiderate mouth up. :rolleyes:
     
  8. rover86

    rover86 New Member

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    hush, troll
     
  9. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Hmmmmm. Troll indeed. :rolleyes:

    The OP invited serious replies and most have been helpful up until you chimed in. So you hush up now and get back under your bridge.
     
  10. amygdala

    Verified Gold Member

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    Perhaps you should let your bf be the top for a while - maybe if you alternate a bit more, you'll give his sphincter time to "heal" after bottoming for you. Just a thought.
     
  11. meerin

    meerin New Member

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    Maybe it's too much to take at once. You could try gradually working your way up with different size dildos until he can take your size without leaking. And I don't know how he'd feel about it, but if he's leaking now, he could wear a panty liner until he's healed. They are very thin, no one would know and it would be easier to change one of those than his underwear while he's at work.
     
  12. B_cigarbabe

    B_cigarbabe New Member

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    How great was your response Davey?
    Almost perfect, but I'll bet if you put your foot in the trolls mouth that would close it for sure! :eek: :rolleyes:
    C.B.:saevil:
     
  13. wristthickxl

    wristthickxl Active Member

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    I would like to thank those of you who took this seriously. I appreciate it.

    Tonight my lover decided that we need to put a halt to anal sex, at least when it comes to my making love to him. This is understandable clearly but it also hurts. He says he still loves me but it will change the dynamic of the relationship....And it reinforces the sometimes freakish feeling one has being this well-hung (the kids in school, because I was so skinny back then, called me dick on a stick)...

    I know a lot of men wish they had a really big dick and the attention is often nice but frankly, careful what you wish for...it isn't very practical.

    My lover was seeing a physical therapist about this and she has now made an appointment for him at a local hospital for further investigation but that won't happen until November...

    I was away for seven weeks and his problems pretty much disappeared so it is clear to him and me that the size of my penis is causing these problems as they returned the day after we had sex upon return and intensified after only the second time...

    Just for clarity, he says the leaking has somwhat abated but that he often simply smells and believes that his sphincter simply isn't closing the whole way...

    For those of you who were sarcastic and mean, I will take the high road. But you should probably try and remember that this is a support group ...and that in life, what goes around comes around.


    If anyone has any more helpful suggestions or info, please let me know. Thank you.
     
  14. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    I would treat this as fecal incontinence is treated.

    When looked at from that perspective, the main focus of treatment is in training someone to consciously use their pelvic floor muscles to close tightly when they need to. Apparently the best treatment involves using biofeedback. Most people don't consciously control their pelvic muscles and couldn't control them if asked to. Biofeedback helps people to identify and then learn to control those muscles.

    The good news is that most people who need this therapy have a physical problem with their anus that has actually damaged the muscles. In your boyfriend's case, there does not appear to be any tearing or damage, just stretching. For lack of a better word, his sphincter muscles lost their tone. By consciously training those muscles, he can give them the tone they need to function. One of the benefits of this training is that he will also learn to relax and open his anus to accept you and thus prevent it from being forced open externally by you every time you have sex. This will result in less trauma for his anus.

    I have heard of men with this problem train with rubber dildos of various diameters. They act as artificial resistance, giving him something to squeeze against while strengthening his muscles. Just like with strength training, he starts small with a low-resistance dildo and then works his way up to larger, denser ones as his strength and control improves. Now, I have only heard of this with fisters so I don't know if it's medically-accepted or not, but it does seem to work.

    Diet is also important. Regular meals at regular times with plenty of fiber will help prevent unwanted leakage as well. In the mean time, go with the minipads and start on the Kegels (which will also help his penis and ejaculations as well).

    I would suggest he find someone who is a specialist in treating fecal incontinence. That person will help him learn how to manage this.

    I also suggest that you help him as well. Go in together on the biofeedback device, offer to go with him to the therapist, be patient and supportive as you know how to be while keeping communication open and honest. Help him understand that your frustration is not with him but the situation and realize that this is a shared issue that is as much yours as his. Mutual support is very important. He may feel angry or inadequate that his body cannot do what he wants it to just as you feel guilty for being too big. You're concerned that your penis is threatening the relationship and that's not good.

    With time and persistence and mutual support, I think this can be conquered and the both of you can go back to the dynamic you most enjoy.
     
  15. svevremenski

    svevremenski Member

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    human anus should be a one way street :))
     
  16. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    True, but unfortunately we need to shit as well. Nothing we can do about that.
     
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  17. svevremenski

    svevremenski Member

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    that's one way i was talking about - the way out. using the other way is just dangerous. :)
     
  18. D_Gunther Snotpole

    D_Gunther Snotpole Account Disabled

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    Sir, you have been honored to witness what I believe is a rare case of Jasonian irony.
    Treasure it.
    I would.
     
  19. D_Ollyvalle Treegirth

    D_Ollyvalle Treegirth Account Disabled

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    Simply brilliantly put. This could be the response to so many immature posts on lpsg.
     
  20. Runco

    Runco New Member

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    You have not said whether or not you are using condoms. If you aren't, try using them to see if the problem goes away. The only reason I mention this is occasionally when I had sex with my ex, I would have seepage the next day (normal). It was watery. And sometimes it smelt. This combo with my own natural scent meant that sometimes I felt the smell was pretty strong. I don't know if it was a dietary thing on his part but this may be the problem with you and your partner. Sometimes natural scents combine and they don't smell pleasant. Plus bareback anal sex is like having an enema (of sorts) so any fecal matter left in the bowel (after cleaning) will trickle out the next day along with any semen that was deposited. I am not sure that is the size of your penis but that said, clearly your partner (more than anyone) would have to be the one to judge whether this is likely to be the problem.
     
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