sex after babies,

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by dolfette, Oct 12, 2009.

  1. dolfette

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    is it different for you?
    if so, how?

    for me, i have to say yes.
    since the birth of my second {10lb 12oz, natural birth} my clit has been far less sensitive...practically numb in comparison to how it was before. once i could orgasm with a few flicks...three minutes and i was there. now i require several minutes of direct contact with a powerful vibe...manually i have to actually cause bruising to get enough stimulation.
    i suspect a lot of nerve damage.
    likewise, the inside of my vagina is also numbed.
    breast feeding reduced nipple sensitivity by only a fraction, which is good.
    hormonally, my drive never returned to former levels...though that may have something to do with age.

    i have compensated for this feeling of...well, it's like sex with the volume turned down to barely audible...by delving into bdsm. rough sex, because pain is at least some sensation.

    your turn!!
     
  2. B_spiker067

    B_spiker067 New Member

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    That's really too bad.

    1) What did the doctor say about the possible nerve damage?

    2) Has medical internet searching turned up anything?
     
  3. dolfette

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    there's nothing can be done about it.
     
    #3 dolfette, Oct 12, 2009
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2009
  4. B_spiker067

    B_spiker067 New Member

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    I can't do anything about it, but I find this interesting.

    Well at least tell me what the medical term is.
     
  5. dolfette

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    no idea what the medical term is.
     
  6. B_spiker067

    B_spiker067 New Member

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  7. StraightCock4Her

    StraightCock4Her New Member

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    Dolfette, I want to give you a big hug


    That baby is sooo large... Shouldn't the doctor have seen how big he was and told you a C-section would have been a better idea??
     
  8. dolfette

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    it was an easy labour actually.
    sexual thrills aside, it's better for mother & baby to have a natural birth.
    and i'm glad i did. i got to get up, bathe, dress, walk out the door and then take my baby home the very same day...getting home was great!
     
  9. B_chubsy1

    B_chubsy1 New Member

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    Hi Dolfette

    my two were natural births but neither were as large as your 10 pounder! I have definitely lost some sensitivity inside but my clit is still fine. The upshot for me is that full sex isn't as nice any more so most of hubbys 'work' is now done orally, lucky for me he knows what he's doing!! Guess its the price we have to pay for natural childbirth honey. Might explain why we're on here looking at big'uns!

    K xx
     
  10. dolfette

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    i wonder how common this is...
    it's certainly not something they tell you about at lamaze!
    i suspect it happens to lots of women,
    but it's just not something we talk about.

    i think you might be right about the big'uns hunting :tongue:
     
  11. Symphonic

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    That's natural. The inside should dull, unless you are really hunting an aneurysm. . . Of course if women enjoy sex more you now know what man-sex feels like. Sucks, huh?
     
  12. dolfette

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    been drinking?
     
  13. NotQuite_9x7

    NotQuite_9x7 New Member

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    My wife doesn't seem to get as much pleasure from sex since we had a baby and it's been almost 2 years. She use to be very orgasmic, but now.. nothing. I want to make her orgasm again. I need advice.

    BTW- She really not comfortable with receiving oral sex.
     
  14. L_Lynn

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    Kudos to you Dolfette for opting with natural childbirth, especially with an almost 11 pound newborn!

    My daughter was 8-1/2 lbs, 22" long and I had natural childbirth. I did a lot of kegels and squats and massaging the perineum before hand and though I had to push a long time (she was facing out instead of back), I got her out with no episiotomy or stitches needed (thank you and I'm darn proud). Even with all the prep, things were NOT the same for a few years. Add breastfeeding for 18 mos to the equation and I did not want my nipples touched either. Sex was a bit dull for awhile.

    BUT here I am several years later and things are better than ever. My libido is high, my sensitivity is good, things are toned and tight down there... The female body is an amazing and ever-changing thing. I would say give it time and your sensitivity and sex drive may return better than ever.
     
  15. L_Lynn

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    Doctors and medical books say it takes three years for a woman's body to completely recover from pregnancy and childbirth. Id' give it more time, continue being supportive and keep trying new things.
     
  16. thadjock

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    this reminds me of that family in arkansas that has 19 bilogical kids and i think they were all natural births.

    I'm suprised that chick can even hold a baby in that thing anymore for 9 mos.

    would be like shootin ur load over the edge into the grand canyon.
     
  17. Trouty

    Trouty New Member

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    Sorry to hear about your post-natal problems Dolf. At least you're still interested in sex after having babies.
     
  18. dolfette

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    2 years isn't that long for returning to normal.
    don't lose heart just yet.
    i did all the prep.
    my pelvic floor is toned & tight and i didn't tear.
    but it's been nearly 9 years.
    if it was going to improve then it would've by now...

    it's the clit desensitisation that's the most drastic.
     
  19. dolfette

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    you're a moron :smile:
    well i never was physically motivated. it's always been a mental thing for me. a sort of power trip i suppose...a kick from turning him on, making his eyes roll back in his head and his body shudder. it's pretty cool.
     
  20. SilverTrain

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    Hmm, is that what's happening in the avatar pic, then?
     
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