Sex, big dicks, pain and morality
- Thread starter MoociMan
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That's a lot of "maybes" and "we don't know enoughs". What we can hear her say is "stop, it hurts" and that should be the end of the story. Anyone who continues to inflict pain after hearing those words is abusive and rationalizing it with whatever excuses or scenarios you want to dream up is wrong, because you don't know the back story any more than anyone else here.
What more info does any man need other than "Stop means stop"?
What more info does any man need other than "Stop means stop"?
it wasn't you who said that.
it was another poster in this thread.
doing it and selling it are different.
what a couple does in private is their own business, but when you become part of the machine you need to take responsibility for the messages you send out.
to be clear, i'm saying that i think it's morally wrong to sell these scenes, i'm NOT saying it should be banned.
She said stop and he didn't stop. He didn't even pause and say, "Are you ok?" He just ignored her and kept going. As Dolfette said, it's not right to send out those messages.
I think if anyone is feeling pain in a bad way they should immediately let the other person know and then decide whether to stop or try a new position. I know this from experience and I've always been understanding about it.
Incocknito
Sexy Member
For all you know, she was paid/told to say that and to pretend to have trouble taking him. Although IMO she didn't seem to have much trouble, as I said.
I have seen porn where a woman could not get any of a cock in her pussy. That qualifies as "too big". Nothing in here is too big.
As I've said, even if she had been acting/paid - it is still dangerous. Simply because others could view the video as standard sexual behaviour - where 'no' means 'keep going - I want it really'. In most cases, not-stopping would be rape. 'Too big' isn't the issue. Size isn't the issue here. Big or small penis - if a lady tells me to stop or appears to be in pain/uncomfortable, I stop.
this is a porn movie and what has been implied has been supplied perfectly, men are turned on by domination movies as it brings them back to their animal instincts, google how lions mate, very similar IMO.
my wife loves a big cock inside her, even if it hurts her.. her ex is over 10 inches and thick and after he fucks her,, you can't go near her for a few days as she is very very sore, but she chooses it, when she is fucking him, she'd be shouting stop all the time..so very hard to distinguish
my wife loves a big cock inside her, even if it hurts her.. her ex is over 10 inches and thick and after he fucks her,, you can't go near her for a few days as she is very very sore, but she chooses it, when she is fucking him, she'd be shouting stop all the time..so very hard to distinguish
also it has to be remembered that stop doesn't always mean stop during sex, when i'm been topped by another guy, i'd often use the word stop as a way to tell him take it easy that he's going too deep or hard and try a new pposition, it doesn't mean stop literally so as previously stated its always very important to state clearly what you want and what the situation is
This reminds me a lot of about the argument some people make, "Violent video games breed violent individuals", before they proceed to try and deny everyone access to something they enjoy.
I don't know if there have been any studies into the effect of rape-y videos on men, but as far as games are concerned I go with the view that violent games only affect people who originally had violent tendencies, and I'll apply that argument here. It wouldn't be fair to deny all the innocent by-standers access to their fetishes just because it may be viewed by people who want to do it in real life.
Just to be clear, I don't condone this kind of behavior in real life and would never engage in it. But this video is obviously just 'petite-girl-taking-an-eighteen-inch-cock!!!' porn, and really mild compared to some other real rape porn on the net. Like another user said I think this was just very well acted and it's just pandering to certain people's kinks.
I sometimes get turned on by BDSM, but there's no way in hell I'd do it in real-life for fear of both my and my partner's safety (I know it can be done safely, but I always imagine the worst case scenario and chicken out).
Like-wise some guy's may get turned on by the fantasy of a beautiful woman writhing around on their (imagined) huge cock in a 'hurts-so-good' fashion, but in real life they could/would never inflict such abuse on their partner. So to satisfy that fantasy in a completely harmless fashion, they turn to porn. And the porn industry is always willing to satisfy a paying customer.
Incocknito
Sexy Member
Yes. People be overreacting up in here. Saying that "big dick" porn encourages rape is like saying "teen porn" (using skinny flat chested girls) encourages sex with underage girls. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. But to me it's just porn.
Not that I am into teen porn myself, or even "big dick porn" so much.
Also as sumbodii said, what percentage of people really watch "big dick" porn then think to themselves 'now I wanna go out and get my rape on'? Probably 1% or less. I mean ask yourself how many murderers watched a "violent" movie before they committed the murder. Not very many, if any at all. And some of those using that as a defense will just be saying it...as a defense.
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That's hardly the point, is it? The OP only used the video as an example to start this discussion. It's about what happens in real life. We all know porn doesn't reflect real life.
For me it's hard to watch video's like that or any scenes concerning realistic violence. I know it's out there and I know it happens, but it doesn't mean I like watching it. Especially when it's meant to turn me on, like in porn.
The only person who said it is okay if it happens in real life (i.e. no safe word, girls saying stop but guy continues) was the guy who said 'he can't stop, it happens.' Everyone else seems to think it's horrible.
We're only arguing that the video the OP used is being taken too seriously as more than just porn. Just because you are turned off by acted out scenes portraying realistic violence doesn't mean all people who are turned on by it are bad. Some people just like extreme stuff, be it the portrayal of abuse or the far end of a fetish spectrum (shitting hentai dick nipples for example).
Honestly, I doubt the people who actually enjoying abusing their partners in real life will post here.
Incocknito
Sexy Member
If everyone knew porn doesn't reflect real life then this thread would never have been created and people wouldn't be arguing.
And you seem to have missed the point. Various people said that "rapey" type porn encourages rape in real life. I was just pointing out that even if it did, it would only do so insofar as violent movies, which are video media and therefore akin to porn, would do.
People blame porn/video games/movies for [violent] crime but really how much crime do they directly cause? Probably none.
Here is a nice article about video game violence and real world violence:
Video Games And Violence: Are Studies Biased?
It's not porn but it's not entirely irrelevant.
http://www.lpsg.org/150112-ladies-%7Byes-thats-the-ones.html
^^^my personal experiences of guys who learn sex from porn.
obviously this is a pretty small sample group and i have no idea how common this is. it may be entirely coincidental.
in my own limited experience, men who watch a lot of porn before they have sex have picked up bad habits, attitudes and techniques from it.
^^^my personal experiences of guys who learn sex from porn.
obviously this is a pretty small sample group and i have no idea how common this is. it may be entirely coincidental.
in my own limited experience, men who watch a lot of porn before they have sex have picked up bad habits, attitudes and techniques from it.
I think you're right about men who watch too much porn learning the wrong examples, and that is probably because boys can now easily access free porn and from a young age start to believe porn applies reality. I'll admit I was one of those people, and the first time I had sex I had a rude awakening. But I think the vast majority of first times have a lot of perceptions crushed and they don't all stem from porn.
Over time, and with the help of an understanding partner, I learnt just how full of crap porn sex was and I'm sure all sensible individuals do. Even my tastes in porn have come a long way from when I was just a teenager with my growing understanding of real sex. So, like I said before, I think only the real psychos would ever apply porn to real life even after they experience real sex. But don't hold it against a poor first timer if he tries to apply the closest thing he has to practical sex ed. to real life.
EDIT: I guess I should have read the rest of your thread before making such a long post. Most of the stuff I wrote had been mentioned in there already. Oh well.
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Incocknito
Sexy Member
I missed the part in that thread where you said men who "learn sex" from porn like raping women or "learn rape" from watching porn.
Or are you telling me that you have changed your argument from "porn (at least the porn in this thread) promotes rape" to "porn promotes bad habits, attitudes and techniques."?
Because they are both quite different and the latter is old news. And there are lots of things besides porn that do the same.
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