Sex in a relationship

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by 1105931, Aug 14, 2018.

  1. 1105931

    1105931 Guest

    Yo what's up...

    I started dating someone about a month and a half ago, he's a great guy (I'm a dude too) and he's totally my type, twinky white boy with a great hairless ass and a tight hole...

    And for whatever reason I can't finish (orgasm) with him... tbh it also happened at first with a prior relationship. I think there's some psychological fuck up there or something... but I can get off with my playmates all the time, when it comes to dating I guess I feel like I need to be in love and feel loved before I can actually make proper love, but when it comes to casual fucking with other friends I have no problems... I'm just wondering if anyone goes through anything like this or similar...

    Idk if it's a bit of performance anxiety with someone I care about or if it's some twisted sex thing where it's only proper if it's nsa... or as stated before I need to feel 'at home' and have a deeper and more meaningful connection before I'm able to orgasm.
     
    nicnic likes this.
  2. 1178303

    1178303 Guest

    I would say don’t focus on it and it will work out. You know it’s not physical. Worrying about it may make it worse.
     
    Fusionheat and keenobserver like this.
  3. uncut7in

    uncut7in Well-Known Member

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    Performance anxiety is more often about not being able to get an erection, and that doesn't seem to be your problem. I would enjoy the fuck and not get hung up about it. I was very much in love with my last boyfriend, and when I fucked him I often didn't spunk inside him. I still enjoyed the fuck, knowing I was giving him pleasure.
     
    Fusionheat likes this.
  4. Anthony_OZ

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    There is nothing wrong with you mate. What you describe sounds exactly like myself, and I’ve had this ‘issue’ with partners before but once you stop thinking about it you’ll be fine.

    Funnily enough I actually spoke to a therapist about it - I had no issue with getting off with random hookups. In those situations I almost allowed myself to be more in the moment, and the act of being someone I didn’t know was in itself a turn on to me. Sex with someone who you’re more familiar with is different, and for me it was about becoming used to the new normal, if that makes sense.
     
    nicnic, fxstsb96 and Fusionheat like this.
  5. bi_todd

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    Something from my life that may be relevant ...

    With random hookups, I am mostly focused on my pleasure.

    Sex within a relationship is many times focused on the other persons pleaaure.
     
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