sex or friendship?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by MattMatt, Sep 8, 2006.

  1. MattMatt

    MattMatt New Member

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    Ive always said ,
    If you get along IN the bedroom you'll stay together,
    If you only get along OUT of the bedroom, youre doomed to fail.

    Whats more important to LPSG members, sex or friendship?
    (relationship-wise, not casual or one-nighters ( of course)
     
  2. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

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    If I have to pick one or the other, I pick friendship. Technically, you can have sex with anyone, but you can't be friends with them all.

    Fortunately, they are not mutually exclusive.
     
  3. Ed69

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    My wife and I were friends first,sex came later.Now both go hand in hand if we are not getting along there is no sex even if she wants it.When I'm upset I'm not horny,so I would say both are very important to me.However my experience is limited she was my first lover(yes I was a virgin till I was almost 22 yrs old).We've been together 15 years and still love to hang out,play billiards and fuck like bunnys when the mood strikes us!(which is quite often!)
     
  4. rawbone8

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    Ed, you and sassy Lisa seem like a great couple. Glad to see both of you here.
     
  5. Love-it

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    Beautiful comment.

    During our 32 years together friendship held us together and the sex was wonderful, until I found that she experienced pain during intercourse. THere were years where there was little sexual activity and we persevered, later on she started to enjoy oral sex even more and that sustained us, now she is using increasing diameter dildos to see if she can get used to my size. There is hope and she likes her orgasms from oral and vibrators it is and has been very nice that she wants to make love. But friendship is the glue that binds.
     
  6. Gillette

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    Friendship.

    What's been left out is that if you only get along IN the bedroom it is also doomed to fail.

    For a truly strong bond both should be present.
     
  7. 13estPen

    13estPen New Member

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    For me friendship is much more important.
    Friendship is last longer and can turn into sex sometimes :p.

    Also, you can buy sex not friendship.
     
  8. Lex

    Lex
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    If you can't fuck your friends, who can you fuck?!?
     
  9. joyboytoy79

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    Friendship!!!

    With that said: Even if you are the fastest of friends, if there's no sexual chemistry, you will only be friends. I've also found the inverse to be true. If you have GREAT sexual chemistry and everyone involved agrees it's the best sex to have even graced the planet, and you DON'T have any friendly bonds... well, you may have the occasional (rare) fuck and that's all.

    In a romantic relationship you really need a healthy dose of both sex and friendship, or it just isn't going to work out!
     
  10. karmen

    karmen New Member

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    MattMatt:

    Does the old friends having sex ever work--really. A recent development for me is talking to guy who want to be friends first and then sexual partners. After due consideration, I think that's probably a good idea.

    But I've never had sex with a male friends. No excuses like we were both high on drugs, we were both sloppy drunk or the famous we were both bored excuse.

    A friend is a friend is a friend and a sexual partner is hopefully not only a sexual partner but also very good friend. :wink: .

    Hugs and Kisses,

    Karmen
     
  11. Heather LouAnna

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    Can't you have both?

    All of my recent "relationships" have been friends with benefits. I make this specifically clear to all of them before engaging in anything that we're just friends that like to have sex sometimes.

    I don't want despairing emotions. I don't want anyone to freak out or get attached. I want things comfortable, casual, simple. No boundaries or labels. Just friends. In fact, I've very few friends (male and female) that I've not done something sexual with.

    lol and I know a good many people...
     
  12. Bigboys girlfriend

    Bigboys girlfriend New Member

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    Hmmmmmmmm........

    Well sex with somebody is certainly a good way to make a friend!
     
  13. stud_hunter

    stud_hunter New Member

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    I know couples who had great sex but the relationship broke down for other reasons. I don't know any couples whose relationship ended purely for sexual reasons. If there are sexual problems it's usually because of other issues. If you're talking about a monogamous relationship I think you need both - getting along in the bedroom and out. I don't think we can say one is less important, although in most cases I'd guess it's easier to fix a sexual issue than a non-sexual one - in most cases.
    As for the question of which is more important to me, sex or friendship, it really depends on what kind of relationship I'm looking for. Right now I'd say sex because I'm not looking for monogamy or anything longterm. I'm very much in a friends-with-benefits stage. If I eventually settle down to a real relationship then once again I think I'd need both, I don't think one is less important than the other.
     
  14. hot-rod

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    once met a guy, became good friends, decided to buy a home together because we both decided that throwing our money away on rent was stupid. Over time, fell in love. Are each other's best friend. That was 27 years ago and counting.
     
  15. hot-rod

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    Damn straight!......Like my brother always says, "git ur in the shitter"
     
  16. Ethyl

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    I'm greedy. I won't consider involving myself in an honest-to-goodness monogamous relationship unless both are included, among other things..
     
  17. yhtang

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    You lucky so-and-so....
     
  18. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Obviously your creepy neighbour.:rolleyes:

    I am a firm believer that a good relationship starts with friendship.
     
  19. Mr. Snakey

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    Yes Thats what friends are for:biggrin1:
     
  20. ajay38

    ajay38 Member

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    Gotta disagree with ya there bud! Been with my partner for 5 years now the sex was good at first we never have it now except once in a blue moon! But we are still partners and passionate about each other emotionally. Sex is really just a bonus in my opinion. Physical passion usually burns out but emotional bonds last!

     
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