SexEd Advice

Sealofapproval

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I am part of a not-profitable organization that deals with going to schools and colleges for sexual education, since it is not mandatory in the country i live in and most parents have NEVER talked to their children about sex.
We also try to make a different approach to sexEd. For example, we explain to them the different contraceptives there are but focus more on the pill and the condom over the vasectomy and the DIU.
In regards to the condom we also try to explain to them how to put it on cut and uncut dicks, how to lube them up, why are there condoms with flavours and everything. We know that most of them are to awkward to ask us these types of things.
As you can see we take an original approach to teaching them about sex. Our lessons are about:
1. The anatomy and UTI
2. Contraceptives and Virginity
3. Masturbation
4. LGBTQQIAAP2
5. Questions

My main question for you is:

What things would you like to/should be taught in SexEd? Were you completely informed, or are there things that you only knew much later in life/ you found out through the internet/ you were misinformed etc.?

PS: If you could, also send me some feedback. Do you think this model of classes is better than the standard model of: here's a bunch of ways to not get pregnant. Here are some condoms, you put it like this in a cucumber. Dont have sex kids!
 

Call_Me_Daddy

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I think you should discuss how most people, male and female hate condoms. How condoms ruin male erection/ejaculation, and how if not properly lubed will not only be uncomfortable/painful for women, but will also fail. And speaking up about using extra lube needs to be taught to females since men can't feel if the women's dried up or not.

I personally fought a losing battle with rubbers when I was single and finally gave up on them due to breakage and lack of sensation.
 
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sykray

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I agree with both posts ^^. I found that teenage girls were more prepared to ask questions than the boys in a mixed group. The boys were much more prepared to speak in an all-boys group. It was easier to find the right coverage of topics and concerns when there was plenty time for questions after the "scripted" presentations. That way, the information could be tailored to the particular group of students.
 

Betty_Cocker

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1. You should be sure to include the information about the fallibility of the condom.. that they are not failsafe, but are the best way to protect both partners from STD's.
2. You didn't mention that you cover STD's (this is a BIG issue with young adults.
3. Also one thing I've found so many people to believe: Oral sex is not sex. (FALSE) You can get oral herpes and oral HPV from oral sex. (And it's called oral SEX for a reason.) So many young people experimenting with sex believe that giving the guy a blowjob is not sex, so they are safe.

These are things I've experienced personally (either from my own education or attempting to educate my children.) Yes, the biggest lack of education was regarding STD's and oral sex.
 

sexplease

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just topics that I find interesting.
Love and sex are two different things.
The human is 1st an animal - some behaviors cannot be legislated.
play safe - practice self control or a very least, birth control, 18 years is a long time to pay for 15 minutes of sex
From an anthropology stand point: men just want to fight and fuck. Women want to communicate and nurture.
.
.
 

pepinogrande

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I agree with #s 4 and 5 most emphatically.

2. I think the concept of love also has to be defined as 'LOVE IS TO WANT THE VERY BEST FOR THE OTHER PERSON'. (St Thomas Aquinas).

3. Therefore: When you love a person you will protect them from disease...even if you have to give up some pleasure to do that.

4. And yes, stress the problems with oral sex: it is the chief cause of cancers of the mouth, tongue, esophagus.

5. If you can find some films, cartoons, to keep it happy, cheerful, comical: you will find your teaching a lot easier.

6. And, yes, keep the groups separate, young men and women have different issues and sensibilities.

7. Good luck, you have a very important job to do.
 

Exbiker

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I think it should not all be about the mechanics and biology, and diseases etc., though that should be there. As should pregnancy, obviously, in the more usual heterosexual case.

But I think there also NEEDS to be something about the social, inter-personal function of recreational sex. IE, admit that some people are NOT just having sex to make babies AND that others aren't all just having it to fulfil a need for physical pleasure ( like eating a burger, or smoking ) ...

For many people, the communication you can get from sex, opens doorways to an intense kind of personal, spiritual, artistic thing, which can be very important in life, and should not be taken too lightly. Obviously it CAN be fun ( and/or funny ) too, but that's not all it is, or not necessarily ...

I think some people think all you need to explain is the social rules, the limits, and the risks.

I'd like to see someone try to spend a little time talking through the upside of it ... in all its forms. Celebrating diversity could be part of that. But even if there was only one race, and one form of sexuality, for some it would still all be like strippers and sex toys and juvenile humour ... and for others, it would be something very different, more gentle, more thoughtful and ultimately of higher value ...

You could do a discussion based on comparing the artistic value of a stripper show ( male or female ) and Michaelangelo's David, or Da Vinci's Mona Lisa... ?
 
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deleted356736

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I agree 100% with call me daddy and have rarely used condoms. They are dreadful things and most women dislike them as much as most men.

Even if you do use condoms for protection against STIs I don't regard them as being reliable enough for birth control (before the pill many couples combined condom useage with pulling-out because of this). I do recommend hormonal birth control as being the primary birth control with condoms seens as STI protection only. I type hormonal because the pill is very 1970s, and there are patches and implants which are much more reliable and less intrusive.

To me sex is more than genital to genital penetration and this really ought to be discussed with younger people before or when they start experimenting. It's about touch, taste, scent, arousing your partner and your partner arousing you, and of course that most women don't orgasm with intercourse and many men use oral sex or other ways to let their partner have an orgasm before penetration.
 
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Sealofapproval

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Thank you so much for your feedback so far. Id like to say some things about the discussion
1. Although it is not mentioned on the original post, it is obvious that we talk about stis and the pros and cons of each contraceptive
2. However, if we alert to the fact that most males and females dislike condoms, the most effective contraceptive against stis and birth control, they will stop using it to use just the pill and whatnot. We need to give them the information about the best way to use them but we mustnt teach them what they will prefer, as it wont make them use it, i guarantee.
3. In regards to separating male and females, i understand your point of view but we cannot do it for economical reasons and because we believe men and women should be taught in the same room, to be propelled to understand how the other sex reacts and to do some activities which envolve the opposite sex. Futhermore, in the beggining we definately feel that most of them are afraid and awkward to talk about sex; there is always that giggling when we say penis and vagina and whatever. However, these classes are not typical lessons. Forcing them to say penis and vagina for a minute or reading outloud really provocarive questions to ask the teacher and us answering them as straightforward as we can, makes them more relaxed and, at the end, it is hard to find someone who hasnt asked or participated in the discussion
4. About the joys of sex, we try to teach them that sex has to be a enjoyable activity, the importance of saying no, and recreational sex. However, i think we can cone up with some exercises to develop this topic. The debate suggested unfortunately cannot be made as we are always in a rush and that activity takes some time. That being said, we almost always are asked about prostitution and strippers.
5. Oral sex being sex, we talk about it on stis but i think,, when we talk about virginity we can definately emphasize that. We are asked many times if doing oral sex is considered losing virginity. My answer is always: ' you lose your virginity when you think you lost it. I was raped at 13 but i only lost my virginity at 18. That being said, oral sex is sex and can transmit diseases'

Thanks so much for your responses. Keep them cumming (hehe)
 

KindlyJedi

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REAL anatomy, show them textbook anatomical drawings, NOT bananas and doodles on the chalkboard. Be specific; foreskin, labia, clitoris, vagina, eurethra, etc. So many people are clueless about these things...even some of the adults here don't understand the function of the male prepuce or the difference between the vagina and the vulva.

Emphasise condom use. Drill it into their brains. Use whatever techniques, including FEAR, to make them understand about STDs and unwanted pregnancy.
 
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