Sexual Compatibility?

[13788]

H8Monga: What exactly is sexual compatibility?  I remember in college one of the guys was trying to figure out why I wanted to be a virgin. He brought up sexual compatibility, saying I'd never know what girl would be compatibile with me sexually unless I sampled the field.
I didn't think of it then, I just defended myself, but I never asked him what he meant exactly.

Does sexual compatibility mean that you and your partner have common interests, fetishes, and fantasies? Is it about sexual experience? How many people the other has been with and how good they've become from experience? Or does it imply that if you are big, you have to find someone to handle it or if you are small you'd have to find someone who doesn't care? Is it all the above and then some?  

What does it mean? (I didn't know where to put this post so sorry if it's in the wrong category).

 

[benderten2001]

No doubt, many here in this board will immediately jump to applying the "size" issue to the answer.

While that physical aspect I suppose has to be considered (somewhat) , I tend to believe the size factor becomes one which can be "adapted to" over time in most cases.

What's most important regarding "compatibility" I think is the mutual acceptance of each other's sexual drive (and sexual energies) and the willingness to seek ways to please one another in EVERY aspect possible within the sexual relationship.

A truly meaningful sexual "bonding" and "blending" of two people would have to (somewhat) gradually occur over a good length of time.

 

[13788]

Trackers: Well Chubby-Sexy, I'm not enitrely sure what it means either. I'm guessing that it could be a number of things though. The idea about the amount of sexual experience makes the most sense to me, but I may be wrong.

 

[13788]

bustyredhead: You know how some people love "Unreal Tournament", while others love "Connect Four". It's like that, but for sex. I need a guy who's neither too passive nor too domineering. A couple in love can adjust, but starting from a point where your mutual enjoyment is higher is advantageous.

- Nene (The Games People Play In The Middle Of The Night)

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Another ingredient of sexual compatibility is mutual enjoyment of specific activities. For example, if you dig blow jobs, but she has lock jaw. Or if you dig doggy, but she'll only agree to missionary. In cases like this, sexual compatibility is lacking.

 

[13788]

Ineligible: There are all sorts of compatibilities that might be considered. There is sleep compatibility: Do you need similar amounts, at similar times? Does one of you snore while the other requires absolute quiet? Does one of you need complete darkness, while the other insists on a night-light? There is money compatibility: Does one of you spend everything before it's earnt, while the other insists on saving as much as possible? There is entertainment compatibility: Does one of you like quiet nights at home, while the other wants to party? And there are so many others: religious; professional; and let us not forget personality.

I think the message is that, while some degree of compatibility is essential, especially in things that are important to you, to expect complete compatibility in everything is unrealistic. Sexual compatibility might come high on one person's list of crucial things; it might not appear at all on another person's list. The things that are lower down the list for both members of a couple can usually be worked out to some sort of compromise.

 

[jonb]

Yeah, sex isn't the only issue. Personality, trust me, is more important.

Sexually, you have to only do what you're both comfortable with.

 

[13788]

H8Monga: Thanks for the definitions.

 

[13788]

rainfletcher: I think this is mostly a cop out excuse. When men say this, mostly what they are saying is that they hope the girl will fuck them 10 times a week in the manner most pleasurable for them. If not, then they are not 'sexually compatible'

In reality, in a loving relationship, this is almost never an issue. Both parties WANT to please the other in every way possible. And if it's not degrading or physically harmful, then both parties are excited to do whatever is necessary. My partner and I are completely selfish, but in the opposite way. We argue everynight about who will get to 'pleasure' the other person. We wager on it! "If I win, then I get to eat you out for 45 minutes tonight!"...that type of thing.

The size question is almost never an issue. If you love each other, than pleasing each other is the greatest pleasure!

 

[txquis]

I think sexual compatibility is very important.
In CAT ON A HOT TIN ROOF, Big Mama says that
when there are rocky places in a marriage the rocks are
"there" and she points to the bed.

There is tension in any relationship where there is not compatibility both in and out of bed.