Should both top and bottom get off?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by BaldwBeard, Mar 10, 2011.

  1. BaldwBeard

    BaldwBeard New Member

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    Do you always make sure the guy you are with gets off after you do?
    The reason why i ask hopefully is obvious lol. I just got from this hot older muscular studs house. We didn't have Intercourse but I we did have plenty of
    Oral sex... After him blowing him with his big
    Ass load all over my beard he began what I like to
    Call a, "giggle orgasm". He's uncut I get it very sensitive, no problem. so several mins go by with just me stroaking my cock alone with not a single touch from muscle guy.... as I stop stoking my cock he says to me, "you still wanna get off"? I get up grab my clothes and walk to the bathroom rince off his cum out of my beard and furry chest I then grab my pants and walk out...
    Is that something you ask the man you are with or just make sure you do the right thi g and get him off without question?
     
  2. AM_092

    AM_092 Guest

    No matter what, unless a person insists, both people should cum. And you should do your best to help each other.

    I'm the bottom and I'm usually more eager to perform oral sex. I don't mind the guy cumming first. Just help me out when it's my turn :)

    Easy.
     
  3. Florida Boy

    Gold Member

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    No question about it. He should have made the effort. Then If for some reason you did't cum, then not his fault.
     
  4. arthur

    arthur New Member

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    You did right. Walk out. You can have selfish sex if you want.. it's called masterbating. Don't involve anyone else. Ignorant pig. Leave him be.
     
  5. r214

    r214 New Member

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    Yes both should get off. But I do know that I tend to take longer than my bf and because of that from him holding back he loses his ability to orgasm. But if I know, most of the time he comes and then will assist in me finishing.
     
  6. hungboy18

    hungboy18 New Member

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    I think people should be more generous with their partners and even during one night stands, people should never forget that there is a person with feelings and necessities next to them.

    Sex is a very personal and beautiful way of getting pleasure and loving someone, sometimes it's about love, while others it's completely about attraction, hopefully both, but it should always be about getting both people to that moment of euphoria, that an orgasm is.
     
  7. golddong

    golddong Active Member

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    I think its only fair that both cum, its sex etiquette, you wouldnt go to a restaurant together and just order one meal, its selfish! You did right walking out!
     
  8. helgaleena

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    The situation the OP describes sounds like the guy was impatient and also not being any help at all. Very boorish, especially when your partner is wearing your spooge at the time.

    I have had reactions like that from partners in the past who do not think your enjoyment of their 'gift' is a badge of honor. They secretly think their own secretions are filth and you are wrong for liking them. They are seriously mistaken in such an attitude. They must have learned it from repressive potty-training or something.

    If you think it's demeaning to come on me, don't. But I like it and would love to do the same to you.
     
  9. maxcok

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    I'm going to swim against the tide here and say it really depends on the circumstance and especially on the individuals involved. I've had more casual encounters than I count where someone wanted to get me off and was not the least bit interested in reciprocation. I've even been in dating relationships with the same dynamic, one for example where my partner liked to fantasize back on the event later and get himself off when he was alone. It wouldn't work for me, but hey, who's to judge as long as everybody's happy?

    I wasn't there of course, so I have no way of knowing whether the guy was sincere in his offer, but he did ask you if you wanted to get off, so you can't blame him entirely for not communicating your desire. Had I been in your shoes, I would have said, "Hell yeah!", and then proceeded to tell him how, rather than stomping off in a huff. I'm a big believer in being open and communicating up front rather than assuming where sex is concerned. (Applies to other matters too.) Not everybody's wired the same as you or lookiing for the same thing, and to assume otherwise is a prescription for disappointment.
     
  10. baltoguy

    baltoguy Active Member

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    I do believe that yes, you should both get off. Just plain common courtesy!
     
  11. B_Nicodemous

    B_Nicodemous New Member

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    Hm. Ok what was the tone? Was it a "*heavy irritated sigh* so, do you still want to get off?" or was it a *hopeful note* "hey...do you still want to get off? *cuz I would really like to give you a hand or mouth or whatever*

    If it was the former then, you maybe were right in leaving. I would have said, "Uh, yeah!" and if he was less then eager to do so, then would have left.

    But if it was the latter? I guess that's why I would have answered him. It would have shown which meaning he had in mind.

    Like Maxcok says, some people don't care about getting off. He may have had a string of those types. He also may have been a bit embarrassed about his "Dear god, don't touch me, I'm too sensitive" tome. Maybe he felt too much time had passed or that you would speak up. Maybe he was a self serving douche. You (and we) will never know. Next time speak up. Then act accordingly.

    For me, as long as my Guy is trying to please me as much as I am him, it's all good. It also takes me (most of the time) a long time to get off, and sometimes it is just not going to happen. I am too wrapped up in his pleasure, and anyways I don't really see penile orgasm as the end all be all of everything. He (my Guy) is the same way. Knowing this we have wonderful sessions and as we are relaxed and not sweating it, we have way more fun than I have had with anyone else.

    Maybe the real question should be: "Should both partners do all they can to give as much pleasure as they can to the other?"

    Easy answer: Yes.:smile:
     
  12. scottredleter

    scottredleter New Member

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    Depends on the situation. Sometimes I don't want to cum... maybe I just started my night and I want to suck off a lot more guys - if I cum, then i'm not really interested anymore (it's the straightest thing about me). Cumming is not the goal for me. I like when I run into a guy who has that as a goal because it means I can really go to town on his dick.
    Usually when I cum it's because I've sucked so much dick that I just cum hands free, or I'm in a more Top mood and doing the fucking. Or, when I'm having full contact, intimate sex with someone who I know well and share more than just sex.
     
  13. LordDivineFist

    LordDivineFist New Member

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    I suppose it depends really, I'm a total bottom personally and I oftentimes don't care if I cum or not. As long as I've satisfied my man then I am happy and content. Unless of course, I'm going to be milked afterword...But I normally don't care either way.
     
  14. coolhungluke

    coolhungluke Active Member

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    Yes. I think both should get off.
     
  15. HeBop

    HeBop New Member

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    My thought exactly.
     
  16. poppinfresh

    poppinfresh New Member

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    being a bottom for me and not climaxing keeps me in the mood for as long as he wants to blow a load once i do it takes me few hours to get back in the mood.
     
  17. BigD_2

    Verified Gold Member

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    It does depend on the situation and the people involved, as does pretty much everything in life - sexual and non-sexual - it is awfully hard to make sweeping, blanket statements that are universally applicable.

    If "Do you still want to get off" was asked of me in the situation you describe, I would say, "Yes, it just takes me a while" (true) and also "You could help by ___" where the blank was filled in with whatever I was feeling like at the time. I could see how you would get offended, but some people aren't that skilled at asking things correctly and what he may have meant was "Can I help you get off?"

    If what he meant was, "I got off, what's your problem?" or "I'm done here, hurry up" then you were 100% right to leave his stupid ass sitting there.

    For me, I don't consider a hook-up complete unless both of us have cum. Which is fairly easy since I do generally last longer - I want the partner to cum, then I will.
     
  18. kayman

    Verified Gold Member

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    I agree. 90% of the time the only way I can cum is if a guy eats me out (rimming) and knows how to go to town down there. Only 1 guy I dated knew how to do that well, the rest was so-so...
     
  19. ThickPup

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    As a top, I like to get off while topping.
    I do like to make sure the bottom gets off as well.
    I prefer I cum first, then I can keep topping them and give them a helping
    hand to get them off as well. However there are times that I make them cum
    just by topping them. But in general, I think both should return the favor :)
     
  20. art

    art
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    Of course!
     
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