Should I dump my date for Saturday night?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by barbsdaughter, Oct 6, 2010.

  1. barbsdaughter

    barbsdaughter New Member

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    I went with a friend whose brother goes to SMU to watch Rice-SMU game and then to a party at a frat house off campus where there were about even mix of guys and gals. At the end of the night or rather morning, the guy I was with, who seemed to be a complete gentleman, took me to meet my girlfriend for our drive back home, close to a 7 hour drive. He wanted to see me this saturday and I agreed to the date. Today at school, I find out from my friend some second hand information that this guy had a $500 bet with 5 or 6 other guys that he would 'bang' me, his words, by the second date. I was furious. My friend is very reputable and she confirmed these details with SMU friends how she found out and it all made sense. He's suppose to call me tonight......should I do the right thing and confront the bastard tonight on the phone and call off the date Saturday or wait for him to drive 7 hours to turn him down. The latter is what I'm leaning toward right now. Any ideas ladies.....ladys' responses will carry more weight because after reading a lot of these forums I know what the guys will say. Gone to work out.
     
  2. ManlyBanisters

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    Let him make the drive, go on the date with him and talk about nothing but the amazing sex you used to have with a REALLY HUNG ex, how no man could ever live up to him, blah, blah, blah.

    Leave the date early. Do NOT tell him you knew about the bet.
     
  3. tgirlsrgreat

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    i am a little insulted by the "i know what guys will say" comment, but here goes anyway. call him up and cancel the date. if you want to call him out then that is fine, but do it via long distance (so to speak). do not, let him get all the way there and then do it. mine is not one of concern for his long drive (he's an ass and has proven it if he is doing what you say and i have no reason to doubt that), but rather for your physical safety. if he is that big a jackass, you really don't know what he will do. secondly, cut him off at the knees and be done with it. he comes all the way there and then you do it, he just might want to get even. i don't think you need that to worry about.
     
  4. nudeyorker

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    OK I know you wanted hear from ladies, but how about some simple advice? Don't play games and be an adult. Talk to him about it on the phone and tell him what you heard and see what he says and share your feelings. Then decide what you want to do.
     
  5. petite

    petite New Member

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    A guy like that is likely going to repeat everything you say to all 5 or 6 other guys, and anyone else, so I'd be careful about whatever story you tell him in an attempt to make him jealous. You don't want your attempt to make him jealous to backfire and end up ruining your own reputation or making lots more people gossip about you. Keep in mind that what you say to him will be passed around "telephone game" style, too, and that can affect the details and significantly change the story if it's too complicated or elaborate, etc.

    When it comes to being the victim of gossip, I've been there, and it sucks, but that's what happens. That's how it works. By the time the story is finished going around, any original resemblence it had to the truth has be destroyed and you sound like a hussy in a gossip magazine.

    I think that you should let him drive all 7 hours because he deserves it. The problem is, if he claims that he fucked you and he didn't, how will YOU prove that he didn't? It's better to just turn him down. That way, there's no question that nothing happened.
     
    #5 petite, Oct 6, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2010
  6. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    Id make him do something stupid. maybe even teach him a moral lesson.

    stuff that would humiliate him, maybe even let him take all clothes off and then say I had a bet with my girls that I could make you undress without giving you sex.

    For reputation sake you need someone or something to validate you had no sex with him at all because guys will tell their friends they had sex with a girl even if they didnt.
     
  7. Mr_Bulldog

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    I feel a little belittled by the knowing what guys will say thing but I will give my 2 cents none the less.

    First off I understand you take what your friend says seriously. But I know from experience some friends will sabotage what your doing just so they are happy. Not saying this is the case. This has happened to me and a few others I know of.

    But then again it may be true and I'd say let him drive take you on a date and then leave him with blue balls and 500 bucks in the hole
     
  8. tgirlsrgreat

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    okay, i am going to stand up as a dad. i already said this in my other post, but i am getting very concerned about all the "humiliate him and make him pay" advice you are getting. never put yourself in a dangerous situation if you don't have to. and since you are in no danger now and this is not an issue of national defense, please just cancel the date and let it go.
     
  9. petite

    petite New Member

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    This is true! You never know if he's going to react badly and that could be dangerous.

    All around, it seems like the best thing to do is just cancel the date.
     
  10. Argonaut 1975

    Argonaut 1975 New Member

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    I would go with the "call him, tell him what you heard, and call off the date" approach.

    Don't share your feelings, he hasn't earned that. Simply lay out the situation in a detached fashion.
     
  11. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Why stoop to his level? Simply call him tell him what you know and that he's a total sleazeball then hang up without allowing him to reply. You will retain your dignity and not being able to respond will piss him off any hopefully make him think twice about doing it again.
     
  12. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    I think this is the best approach. I would additionally make sure that all the OPs female friends hear about the kind of guy this is. Unfortunately, however, jerks like this rarely learn lessons. In this case, the a-hole will more likely make sure that his next target doesn't hear about it in advance.
     
  13. Ej4

    Ej4 New Member

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    Split the winnings
     
  14. Stretch

    Stretch New Member

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  15. tgirlsrgreat

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    i just hate it when i try to be a nice guy and get suckered in like this.

    or at least feel like i did.:banghead2:
     
  16. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Whether or not she is sincere is not really important in this scenario. The situation is one that could commonly happen and therefore is worth discussing despite the OP's initial intentions.
     
  17. minimag

    minimag Active Member

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    There's always the passive-aggressive approach. Let him make the drive, go on the date, when it's time for "business" just tell him it's "that time of the month," and you're not feeling up for "business."
     
  18. minimag

    minimag Active Member

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    Another option: turn the tables. Tell him that his friends told you about the bet and they offered you half of the $500 they'll win if you don't sleep with him. He'll probably offer half of what he'd win for "banging" you, but then you can retort that you're not a whore, and have even more justification for dumping his sorry ass.
     
    #18 minimag, Oct 6, 2010
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2010
  19. D_Neeson Niceone

    D_Neeson Niceone New Member

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    Be an adult with some class and self-control. Call him up, explain what you heard, and cancel the date. Don't do it in a fit of anger, but instead show him how little he affected you. Your dignity will remain intact, he'll realize he screwed up and did something disrespectful, and it will end gracefully with maybe an apology on his end.

    Or do the vengeful thing. Make him burn his time and money and then slam it in his face. Become a "bitch" to him and all his friends and enjoy a new enemy in your life. See how that goes for you.
     
  20. barbsdaughter

    barbsdaughter New Member

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    After 43 cell phone minutes later and 8 call backs, saturday date is canceled, he's pissed at his friends, his cell number is now blocked.
     
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