Should I or should'nt I?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by CarlXL, Nov 15, 2010.

  1. CarlXL

    CarlXL New Member

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    I'm in the need for some moral guidance.

    I have a girlfriend who I'm living with and who I love very much. The sex is great and there are no complaints really. A couple of weeks ago I stumbled across a couple online that were looking for hung young men for threesomes and we started chatting. We switched pictures and they're both really hot and good looking and seem interested in me. I didn't really know what I gave myself into - I think that it originally started out as an hunt for attention but now that they want to meet and here's my I'm in need of guidance;

    What should I do? I would love to fuck this guy and his wife and never tell anyone about it but I have no idea weather or not it's going to come back to haunt me later on in life. I'm also living with my girlfriend and I know that this is really the girl that I want to spend my entire life with and I really dont want to screw it up - but then again I can't stop thinking about this couple and turning them down makes me think that I will regret myself in a couple of months.

    So what should I do? Risk ruining the love of my life for an experience of a lifetime or is my relationship too valuable to risk?

    Spare me any kinds of references to the bible, thanks.

    /Carl
     
  2. petite

    petite New Member

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    Well, according to a lot of the respondents in this thread, most threesomes are a disappointment. It may not be the experience of a lifetime, so maybe you shouldn't risk your relationship over it.

    http://www.lpsg.org/210642-fulfilled-fantasy-left-me-unfulfilled.html

    I'm assuming that your girlfriend isn't interested in a threesome, or else you'd be thinking about having one with her, right?
     
  3. tgirlsrgreat

    Verified Gold Member

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    I have a girlfriend who I'm living with and who I love very much.


    if you meant that, then why did you go down the other path? putting that behind, if you meant the above, then absolutely do not pursue the threesome any further. you asked for an opinion, that's mine.
     
  4. B_bi_mmf

    B_bi_mmf New Member

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    Obviously, you think there will be serious fallout if you do it and your girlfriend finds out. But how will you feel if you do it and your girlfriend does not find out? Will you be saddled with all kinds of guilt that will interfere with your relationship with her? Will you feel compelled to tell your girlfriend?

    What if you do it and find that you want to continue with similar exploits? Would you feel comfortable with a long-term double life? Does your girlfriend show any interest in exploits involving other people?

    I'm not advising you against going ahead and doing it. I just think that there are certain questions you ought to be asking yourself before making your decision.
     
    #4 B_bi_mmf, Nov 15, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 15, 2010
  5. NY4Curious

    NY4Curious New Member

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    If your girlfriend neither wants to be part of the party, nor doesn't mind if you join it, by all means go and screw your head off.

    When its over remember your dedication to the woman you live with.

    Open relationships are possible when two very mature people behave very responsibly and truly respect one another. All of the above are unchangable musts if your three way is going to work at all.

    If your girl friend doesnt want you to join the three way, well, you have to choose. That's what life is, making choices. Make a wise one that make's you a better person.

    and remember, there are many hot and not hot three ways floating around out there.
    This isnt the only chance you're going to get to join one.

    No matter which way is going, be cool, don't throw anything up to your girl (even if she throws something up to you.) This may be one of those measures of what kind of man you are.
     
  6. aajjxx

    aajjxx New Member

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    I wouldn't do it, personally.
     
  7. Woody110

    Woody110 Active Member

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    I've got to agree with the posters above.

    Ask yourself what you'd rather live without - the threesome or your girlfriend?

    There's your answer.
     
  8. Stephenmass

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    Especially if this is the girl you are going to marry, by all means do NOT do it. At the same time, in your OP you said you wanted to fuck the guy and his wife too. I'd be asking myself other questions also. Am I bi to want to do this? Do I or will I have regrets if I got married and "down the line" I MUST have the mmf or m2m experience? If your sexuality surfaces say after perhaps you marry the girl, and I'm not judging your sexuality whatever it is, how would you deal with it then? You need to be honest with yourself and you need to be honest with her too. You may not tell her, but then another poster above put it well about if you could live with yourself AND more importantly, would she live with you if she knew?

    Not up to me or anyone else to make these decisions without knowing you better.
     
  9. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Honesty is really the best way to go. You might be better off telling her that this is an experience that you really want in life and see if she will be cool with it. Maybe she loves you enough to let you do this if you are safe? It does not mean she wants to be there or know the details. If she does, she'll tell you that too.

    I would never cheat, but that is my choice. You have one to make. What if you get a disease and give it to her? Also, cheating is the most dishonorable thing you can do to someone you care about. Can you live with that?
     
  10. D_Philodendra Pastieswirls

    D_Philodendra Pastieswirls Account Disabled

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    While this is not exactly identical, an ex-boyfriend of mine told me that he had always been interested in being with a man. We discussed it, talked about safe play and what the parameters would be, and then I let him go and enjoy his fantasy without me. If he had done it without my knowledge, that would have been the end of the relationship, but talking to me about it first made it something that I was comfortable with.

    Your mileage may vary, but maybe you should try to determine what her attitude is on this before you do something rash.
     
  11. DasLeezard

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    I'mma break it down real simple for you:

    If you truly care for this broad, you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

    If not, hey, cut her loose, and have fun.

    No need to have 4 people fucked in this situation.
     
  12. curioustitan

    curioustitan Member

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    Well, if you're thinking things through before acting upon your impulses, at least your moral compass is still functioning, regardless of which way it's pointing, so that's good i guess.
    If you're in a committed and monogamous relationship - or at least a monogamous seeming relationship - wherein your girlfriend hasn't expressed any interest in sharing or any tendencies towards sexual 'left-of-the-middleness' then perhaps you should give this 'ride' a miss. I think that the regret you'll feel on losing out on a possible threeway, will be far less than the regret of losing out on a potential life partner (that could still yet fulfill all your darker desires)... but then, that's just me... i'm a prude LOL.
     
  13. tgirlsrgreat

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    nice


     
  14. DasLeezard

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    s'how I roll. Like cinnamon roll.
     
  15. tgirlsrgreat

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    okay by me

    :lmao:
     
  16. D_Etienne Neerdowell

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    I think that this is typical sex risks that men take when we become too comfortable in a relationship. For most men the yearning passes but those who go for it I think are forever unfulfilled as they then are looking for the next risk to take.

    I would in your case it's not only the sexual acts that excite but also the adrenaline rush from carrying out a threesome without your girlfriend knowing.

    I would advise to avoid it, in fact I think that your desire to engage in such an act points towards the fact that your perhaps a little scared about finally settling down into a monogamous relationship.
     
  17. haulthat

    haulthat Member

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    If its not something you can feel comfortable even asking her if shes cool with, its definitely something you will regret. Even if she could be cool with it, if you don't clear it with her first and years down the line it comes up. She will question if she can trust you, and with good reason. You know her I don't. If you think it would be ok to tell her I love you, your the most important to me there is just some shit I need to get out of my system that is completely physical. Do that. If you think she would go ape shit and burn things... then why risk the girl you said you want to spend the rest of ur life with for a roll in the hay with some couple? and SERIOUSLY? Did you forget what forum you were posting on... what site at that? Biblical references here!? o_O

     
  18. Penis Aficionado

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    If I may ask, MissCaroline, at what point in your relationship did your boyfriend bring this up? How long had you been together?

    More generally, at what point should a guy reveal to a girl he likes that he's had, or thinks about, homosexual experiences? Does this information need to come out around the first date, so that if it's a dealbreaker the girl can escape the situation with no harm done? Or is it OK to wait until both people are comfortable with frank discussions about sex?
     
  19. kurios

    kurios Member

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    Think with your head on this one
    Don't do it
     
  20. D_Philodendra Pastieswirls

    D_Philodendra Pastieswirls Account Disabled

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    He brought it up after we were together about three months. It may not be comfortable to talk about early in the relationship, because both parties are extra concerned about not saying or doing something that would jeopardize the fledgling relationship. But, once there's a real connection, you should be free to share your fantasies, though by no means obligated.

    My concern would be with a girl who really loves you wanting to "escape" because you've had homosexual fantasies or experiences. If that really did happen, maybe it's better that you find someone who isn't so closed-minded, judgmental, and hypocritical.
     
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