Should I talk to her again?

bafflio

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I knew this girl who I really liked but she was in a relationship back then. I liked her so much that I couldn't help but approach her and hang out with her like a friend - although now I think it probably didn't help much. I don't know if she's still in a relationship.

At first she was quite nonchalant about me in general but when I started backing out she started initiating contact. I told her about my feelings in our last meeting 6 months ago and she still talked to me after but I just replied curtly to get over her and eventually the communication died.

Yes, I have been seeing other girls but she is still there on my mind. Back then I thought I saw redflags like she would make fun of some dumb people and stuff and she'd receive my gifts with no hesitation... but still I miss her. I am so confused.
 

Reddhott

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I tend to move forward. If you two naturally cross paths again, worry about it then. In the meantime, keep meeting and seeing other girls. If it was going to happen, it would have.
 
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185248

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Yup, move on. You are getting all moany over something you can't have. Put your energy into somebody that wants you.
 
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185248

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I knew this girl who I really liked but she was in a relationship back then. I liked her so much that I couldn't help but approach her and hang out with her like a friend - although now I think it probably didn't help much. I don't know if she's still in a relationship.

At first she was quite nonchalant about me in general but when I started backing out she started initiating contact. I told her about my feelings in our last meeting 6 months ago and she still talked to me after but I just replied curtly to get over her and eventually the communication died.

Yes, I have been seeing other girls but she is still there on my mind. Back then I thought I saw redflags like she would make fun of some dumb people and stuff and she'd receive my gifts with no hesitation... but still I miss her. I am so confused.


What I have placed in red does not make much sense to me, maybe I'm reading it wrong. But it seems to me you told her your feelings and she told you to move on.


Maybe there are some freudian slips there. But basically your telling yourself it's finished and you posted here because you are feeling a bit of a twinge from the past.
 
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bafflio

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What I have placed in red does not make much sense to me, maybe I'm reading it wrong. But it seems to me you told her your feelings and she told you to move on.


Maybe there are some freudian slips there. But basically your telling yourself it's finished and you posted here because you are feeling a bit of a twinge from the past.

I told her feelings and I thought that was it - that I'd never speak to her again. But she kept talking to me after and I was half-annoyed and half-happy and I couldn't help it. Then eventually she seemed to get the message (i didn't even say happy birthday to her in the summer) and our communication died out.
 
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puckman4

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I knew this girl who I really liked but she was in a relationship back then. I liked her so much that I couldn't help but approach her and hang out with her like a friend - although now I think it probably didn't help much. I don't know if she's still in a relationship.

At first she was quite nonchalant about me in general but when I started backing out she started initiating contact. I told her about my feelings in our last meeting 6 months ago and she still talked to me after but I just replied curtly to get over her and eventually the communication died.

Yes, I have been seeing other girls but she is still there on my mind. Back then I thought I saw redflags like she would make fun of some dumb people and stuff and she'd receive my gifts with no hesitation... but still I miss her. I am so confused.
not as confused as I am
 

kurios

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I would really like to let you know what I think but I can't follow the situation.
Maybe just write down facts
If you told her you were hung up on her and she just gave you a yellow light it means she doesn't feel the same. That's all.... doesn't mean she won't talk to you or that she doesn't want you to stop talking to her. Just means the connection isn't going where you want it to
Keep moving unless you want her as just a friend and that may be ok too
 

bafflio

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I would really like to let you know what I think but I can't follow the situation.
Maybe just write down facts
If you told her you were hung up on her and she just gave you a yellow light it means she doesn't feel the same. That's all.... doesn't mean she won't talk to you or that she doesn't want you to stop talking to her. Just means the connection isn't going where you want it to
Keep moving unless you want her as just a friend and that may be ok too

When I told her I 'liked' her I really wanted to end it there - and I left it at that. I couldn't ask her to leave or cheat on her bf. I thought back then that was the only choice I had (I could have just moved on without telling her anything but I wanted to let her know.. but now that i think about it there's no way she didn't know I liked her more than as a friend). I forced myself to cease communication with her because I'd only feel worse.

I miss her still. I never asked her - do you see us as more than friends? Never asked if she liked me. You'd think normal people would tell you how they felt about you when you tell them what you feel about them... she didn't. She just listened and said thanks and left. But then she kept talking to me.

I guess the reason why i am all the more hungover is because i have changed since then. I don't wear glasses anymore and now i do care about my looks and appearance - like my hair, clothing, etc. Back then when I met her i was like a nerd. I am not anymore. Admittedly I have gotten more numbers and went out with more girls than ever since I changed but - to my disbelief - it seems I am still hung up on the girl. I guess I really want to see if she would change her mind (although I'm guessing probably not).
 

Reddhott

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Being hung up on a girl you can't have is a great way to distance the girls you could be with. It is a lose lose.