Should I Tell My GF About This Site

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Knight, Mar 10, 2005.

  1. Knight

    Knight New Member

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    Hi people.

    So my girlfriend is comin to stay next Saturday for the weekend and maybe into the week ;)

    Anyway I was wondering whether I should tell her about this forum. I'm wondering how she'd react to this forum being about penises and me having my pictures up here. I guess I really wanna know what women though of their partners showing them this site but also some of the guys, just reactions and stuff. I would like to tell her, it'd be cool if she were on here too :D
     
  2. zzorus

    zzorus New Member

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    Well, she would soon learn that a lot of people-straight, gay and in between- who have never met her boyfriend think highly of him because he is so honest and straightforward. He says what he thinks, but always in a way that will not cause offence.
    She will learn that her boyfriend is intelligent and thoughtful, and wise beyond his years.
    She will also learn that he has a great sense of humour; maybe she she will learn that he is open and tolerant and brightens the day for many people.

    Sincerely,

    zzorus
     
  3. Dr. Dilznick

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    I don't know her (obviously) and it certainly does depend on the person but I wouldn't risk it.
     
  4. bigtwin

    bigtwin Member

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    Naturally, one is reluctant to make a recommendation not knowing all the individuals involved. It seems I've read some of your posts (you are a fairly prolific poster, if I've got the right guy) and you talk openly about your gf and what she thinks/does that involves your penis. For that reason, it seems to me she'd be open minded about this site. I don't think I'd make a big deal of bringing it to her attention, bright lights, neon signs and so forth. Its part of who you are, an interest, a leisure activity, so if it comes up along with "I like cooking" or "watching rugby on tv" then there should be no harm.
    My wife has known about lpsg from the beginning. She often reads it along with me. Although she is not interested in doing any solo posting, she likes being an internet back seat driver. Alas, she is not here to weigh in on this one.
     
  5. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    I wouldn't.

    Everybody's gotta have a place to go that's special, private and liberating, that does no one harm, yet allows us to have the 'space' we need sometimes to just blow off steam.

    You may never know that your gf has such a place, not necessarily on the internet, where she wouldn't want you to go.

    Don't even mention it to her. If you do and don't let her see LPSG she'll naturally begin to think badly of LPSG and you.

    Just enjoy your special place. Let her enjoy hers.
     
  6. Imported

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    orionsword57: I told the woman that I now see that I might start communicating with others who were either well-endowed or interested in related issues, just as I told her I "talk" each day to another group that is formed around a totally different subject. She was fine with this group, although she asked me to indulge her by not posting any pictures.
     
  7. txquis

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    It depends on your girlfriend's attitude.

    Despite my utter awe and amazement at cool and together women on this board (like Madame Zora and Texassgirl and bblumbee, etc) I think they are the exception, compared to the women in my real life.
    The women in my own life (with perhaps one or two exceptions) would not be totally comfortable with a site that is about sex....even if it is primarily about your own anatomy, rather than female anatomy.

    Funny, the boyfriends didnt/dont care. But that is different...sexist as it sounds i dont think guys have a huge problem with sexual sites.
     
  8. Kimahri

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    I would tell her. I was pretty upfront about this place to my new partner. He's got some good size on him, so he may join here too.:)
     
  9. lokican

    lokican Member

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    I wouldn't tell her about it in case things dont work out. Sometimes when relationships end one person can feel very bitter and if you dont want many people to know about you being on this site I would keep it private.
     
  10. viking

    viking New Member

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    Why do you want her to participate in the forum?
    BECAUSE YOU THINK SHE WILL ENJOY IT OR GET SOMETHING OUT OF IT/

    OR

    Is it because you want to let her in on part of YOUR life?

    Both are valid things, but one serves her and one serves you.
    There are other ways of communicating with her about who you are.
    Keep this space for yourself. It's good to have a safe place to be honest
    with others but really important to be able to be honest with yourself!
     
  11. bigtwin

    bigtwin Member

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    The way I see it is that privacy is one thing and secrecy another. This may be one girl for one weekend visit. Tell her or not, no big deal. But in the future this girl or another may stay longer, maybe you'll live together, maybe you'll marry. You can be open with her and she can accept it whether she likes it or not. If she decides you're a monster and leaves then maybe its for the best. If you never tell her then one day you might find yourself sneaking away to the internet port in the basement. "Nothing honey, did you know they let Martha out? How about the Jackson trial!"

    Not in my house!
     
  12. Altairion

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    There is always a possibility that a person could use the fact that you visit a place like this and post a great deal of personal information here. Telling people you know about this site definitely would involve a great deal of trust depending on the type of person you are.

    One thing you know better than the rest of us about your gf is how she will react if you ever have a problem or situation rise between the two of you. From what you have said here about her, I doubt you would have this problem, but its something to keep in mind.
     
  13. jeepwranglerboi

    jeepwranglerboi New Member

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    I think ebviking hit the nail on the head. For me, I have only told a few people about this place. I suppose that I am a bit selfish and I just don't wanna share. It's my place to get away, I guess it's my 'Cheers'!
     
  14. woskxn

    woskxn New Member

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    Well, I doubt a lot of those things (from experience) but that has nothing to do with this. Really, coming on this board would not serve that purpose anyways, if those things are true, she doesn't need a internet message board to tell her that. (or you would hope not)

    I think she would find it kind of funny that you were on this forum (because lets face it, it is abit humerous any way you look at it) I dont see the harm though..if you have a strong relationship it would not pose any problems.
     
  15. Kimahri

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    I told my bf about this place only because if I ended up hiding it and it was found down the line, he'd wonder. Having a 24/7 sex drive and being in the midsts of Herble, Ashlar, DMW, JWB, Kozmik, BuffMusicIdol.......um.....anyway, it might make him wonder about my real intentions if I wasn't up front with him.

    :evilgrin:
     
  16. Knight

    Knight New Member

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    Okay thanks guys :D

    I decided I wont tell her just now, maybe later. I mean there's no real reason too I was just wondering...Maybe later but not right now. This is still a cool forum though :)

    Thanks.
     
  17. Pecker

    Pecker Retired Moderator
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    Bingo, viking.

    Or, as that faux Indian in Short Circuit would say,

    "Bimbo!" B)
     
  18. B_HungSpermBoy

    B_HungSpermBoy New Member

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    Hey Knight,

    I think that was a great decision you made. I know my g/f is not as open-minded as the women on this site. She is also a lot younger. I think that in a couple of years she would be cool with it, but my g/f's just getting used to her own body & needs & it would confuse her.

    Have a fun time with yours!! She must be cool because she has a cool b/f like you!
     
  19. Steve26

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    It's a tough call, Knight. I've been open with my wife about this site almost from the start (I've been here on and off for 4 years), but I'm pretty sure I'm in a very small minority.

    My personal reasons for spilling the beans included a general preference for avoiding secrets, even trivial ones like LPSG. There was the more pragmatic issue that I didn't want it to appear that I was hiding something from her when she found the inevitable signs of my having visited the site on our computer. (Secrecy, when discovered, generally creates the impression of something illicit.) I also didn't want to have to be sneaky about visiting the site, as bigtwin alluded to earlier.

    My wife is very open-minded and has been 100 percent supportive. I know different people are here for different reasons, but I am here as a member of a support group. It's hard to argue with offering support to other people, even if on topics that many might regard as sordid. My wife understands that I've had (and continue to have) some issues owing to my size, and thinks it's great that I can share advice and guidance with those facing similar difficulties.

    I find that my openness with her has in no way compromised my privacy here. Then again, I am not a particularly high-profile member and do not share many intimate details of our life together. Frankly, she's not interested enough in large penises (other than mine!) to have ever visited this site on her own, further safeguarding my privacy. I suppose if she were more of a "size queen" that might be different.

    I think in general it's great if members who are in serious relationships can be open with their partners about their involvement here. However ... based solely on the fact that you've had some doubts, it's probably not yet the right time for you to share this with your GF. It's like proposing marriage: you probably shouldn't go there unless you're pretty sure you're going to get a favorable response. ;)

    ~ Steve
     
  20. Dr. Bubbles

    Dr. Bubbles New Member

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    This response comes somewhat late... my apologies...

    I think all the responses given were truly adequate and responsive. However, like many, it would depend on the maturity, the comfortability and the open-mindedness of your friend. Being female, I know that many women would be somewhat disaster proned if they found out there bf or significant other was visiting a site where open dialogue about personal issues was/is being discussed, let alone the fact that pics are often being shared or posted. We tend to have a complex about sexual references and about who knows what and how - so to speak. Another thing is the potential of her asking your very poignant questions about your own identity and orientation. To be honest, it was something of a "cultural shock," one that is different from the many I have endured, to see men actually gauging in conversation, openly and with detail, about their issues, interest, concerns, fantasies, and whatever else. I was floored; dumbfounded is probably a better way to describe it. However, after being here for so long I have come to realize that is superficial and things discussed here are actual, real concerns... not perceptions. Honestly, most women probably would not view it as the same.

    You are on the "up and up," at least I think you are, about what you are doing. I think that is best. However, sometimes it is best to keep some things to yourself. Like my mother told me before, "Sweetheart, some things are just better left unsaid." Should the need arise for you to engage her in the site, then so be it. At this juncture, however, I am not certain it would be beneficial to you or her. Besides, sharing something like this should only be considered when dealing with a serious and committed relationship.

    I have only discussed this site with a couple of my dearest friends. They were shocked that I am even a member here and I don't think they even visit the site anymore. I could trust them. If and when I get involved, that will determine if I will continue to post and visit the site as well as me conveying to my significant other actual information about the site.

    I think Pecker and Jeep said it best when he called things our secret places. This is one of mine, and I like it like that!
     
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