Should we get back together?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by emungaie, Mar 16, 2008.

  1. emungaie

    emungaie New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2007
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Toronto
    i've known him for the last 10 years. We got engaged 3 years ago and about 3 months after that I broke it off. I got so scared of committing to him even though we'd know each other 7 years. He was my first and to date he's the biggest i've ever known, but that's besides the point. He was my first love, but we broke up because I was terrified of making such an important life long commitment to him at the time. I was only 25 and I felt too young to get married.

    I now feel ready to make that commitment to him. And I know he will take me back if I ask but i'm scared that he will never trust me again. I've been with 2 other men since we broke up but none of them serious. the sex was crap with them. I miss him terribly and I want him back. But i'm still scared. Should we get back together? What if he doesn't trust me any more? what if my fear of commitment comes back?

    Very confused here. What do you guys think?
     
  2. B_dumbcow

    B_dumbcow New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2008
    Messages:
    3,220
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    1
    Simply do whatever you think is right...
     
  3. ZOS23xy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2007
    Messages:
    5,073
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    directly above the center of the earth
    Why do you fear commitment?
     
  4. emungaie

    emungaie New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 4, 2007
    Messages:
    8
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Toronto
    you know I'm not sure. I think i fear failing in marriage. I'm a control freak and a perfectionist and a failed marriage would just destroy me. But i'm ready to take the chance now.
     
  5. ZOS23xy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2007
    Messages:
    5,073
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    7
    Location:
    directly above the center of the earth
    Being a control freak is difficult when it involves another person. You need to let go of a few misconceptions or issues and work with someone. Sounds easy to write, hard to practice.
     
  6. maestro071

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Oct 16, 2007
    Messages:
    1,722
    Albums:
    4
    Likes Received:
    504
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    In your bed, lol
    Verified:
    Photo
    Get back to him... Start relation, then you will discover what happens. No need for fear, after all you know him well. At least, you will have good sex again, no? You have nothing to loose...
     
  7. Charles Finn

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 20, 2006
    Messages:
    2,538
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    29
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Toledo Ohio
    trust takes time
    yes by all means go for it
    you will never be sorry you did but you may be sorry you did not.
     
  8. EagleCowboy

    EagleCowboy Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 10, 2007
    Messages:
    1,031
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    136
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    TEXAS
    If he takes you back, then he still trusts you and is willing to put up with all your little idiosyncrasies to be with you. Just make sure you return the favor 100% or let him go.

    You should want to risk everything for true love.
     
  9. dreamer20

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2006
    Messages:
    4,492
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    N.Providence
    You'll never know unless you ask. Find out if he is ready to marry you.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted