Should we get back together?

[emungaie]

i've known him for the last 10 years. We got engaged 3 years ago and about 3 months after that I broke it off. I got so scared of committing to him even though we'd know each other 7 years. He was my first and to date he's the biggest i've ever known, but that's besides the point. He was my first love, but we broke up because I was terrified of making such an important life long commitment to him at the time. I was only 25 and I felt too young to get married.

I now feel ready to make that commitment to him. And I know he will take me back if I ask but i'm scared that he will never trust me again. I've been with 2 other men since we broke up but none of them serious. the sex was crap with them. I miss him terribly and I want him back. But i'm still scared. Should we get back together? What if he doesn't trust me any more? what if my fear of commitment comes back?

Very confused here. What do you guys think?

 

[B_dumbcow]

Simply do whatever you think is right...

 

[ZOS23xy]

Why do you fear commitment?

 

[emungaie]

you know I'm not sure. I think i fear failing in marriage. I'm a control freak and a perfectionist and a failed marriage would just destroy me. But i'm ready to take the chance now.

 

[ZOS23xy]

Being a control freak is difficult when it involves another person. You need to let go of a few misconceptions or issues and work with someone. Sounds easy to write, hard to practice.

 

[maestro071]

Get back to him... Start relation, then you will discover what happens. No need for fear, after all you know him well. At least, you will have good sex again, no? You have nothing to loose...

 

[Charles Finn]

trust takes time
yes by all means go for it
you will never be sorry you did but you may be sorry you did not.

 

[EagleCowboy]

If he takes you back, then he still trusts you and is willing to put up with all your little idiosyncrasies to be with you. Just make sure you return the favor 100% or let him go.

You should want to risk everything for true love.

 

[dreamer20]

I was only 25 and I felt too young to get married.

I now feel ready to make that commitment to him. And I know he will take me back if I ask but i'm scared that he will never trust me again. What if he doesn't trust me any more?

You'll never know unless you ask. Find out if he is ready to marry you.