Shyness during sex

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Army_boy, Apr 29, 2008.

  1. Army_boy

    Army_boy New Member

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    Last night was the first time I've had sex with my boyfriend, let alone with anyone. This morning we decided to have some more fun, well this time while I was mounted ontop of him he wanted me to cum for him while he was inside of me. When I got the sensation as if i was cumming nothing happened, and he got pissed. Is this normal for first timers, is it just shyness, or is something wrong with me?
     
  2. sandwulf

    sandwulf Member

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    I wouldn't worry about it to much if I were you.
    It does happen on occasion, and not just to first timers. The same thing used to happen every once in a while to one of my early boyfriends. More often when he bottomed from the top then any other position.

    What would concern me more than anything is that your boyfriend actually got pissed about it. Sex is rarely ever perfect. Ok probably never 100% perfect no matter how many times you've done it before.
    Things like this or other oddities that you'd never expect to happen do pop up from time to time.

    Personally I feel that the best way to deal with these weird things that sometimes happen is to simply say, well that was odd. Laugh about the odd little things a bit and continue on.

    One of the things I love about my boyfriend is that he is not afraid to laugh along with me when something doesn't go as planned in the bedroom.
     
  3. B_Hung Muscle

    B_Hung Muscle New Member

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    I've had an orgasm without ejaculating. It doesn't happen often, and it can be hot and weird. I feel it all building up and then feel as if I'm shooting, but the well is dry.

    The problem is not with your lack of cumming, but with your boyfriend being "pissed" you didn't react sexually in the way he wanted. There is not a thing wrong with you, handsome. Relax, and tell that boyfriend to be more supportive.
     
  4. Army_boy

    Army_boy New Member

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    Thnx guys. I talked about it earlier with my bf and he was fine with it; he was just mad cuz he had 3 orgasms and I hadn't yet had any. He was afraid I wasn't into him.
     
  5. luke nutley

    luke nutley New Member

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    If it would have been the first time you'd cum in front of someone, it's no surprise you got nervous and you couldn't cum.

    He's a jerk for getting pissed.

    Does he know that this was your first time? If he doesn't, that might explain his reaction. But if he does know, he's definitely a jerk.
     
  6. B_boynextdoorkpt

    B_boynextdoorkpt New Member

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    How can you have orgasm with out ejaculating?
     
  7. B_Hung Muscle

    B_Hung Muscle New Member

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    Just shows how that ugly insecurity manifests itself in relationships. Much better to be honest about your feelings and talk through these kinds of issues instead of lashing out at your partner. You sound like a great boyfriend, Army -- your man should consider himself lucky.
     
  8. B_boynextdoorkpt

    B_boynextdoorkpt New Member

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    Army,
    i have a question, I just noticed it was your first time having sex, did it hurt?
     
  9. Freddie53

    Gold Member

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    I used to think the same thing. I never masturbated before puberty. But guys here report that they had dry orgasms before puberty. That is because no semen is being produced. But the body still goes through all the feelings that it does if there is semen shooting.

    I can remember a few dry orgasms when I had already cum several times that day. I just assumed that it was because I had drained all the available semen and my body hadn't had time to make some more yet.

    Since I broke my neck in 1995, I have had some dry orgasms. I had all the feelings of cumming except nothing came out. Sometimes only just a little comes out. I blame that on the anti spasm medication that I have to take for the spinal cord injury.

    Another interesting thing is that the sperm count and the amount of semen aren't directly related either.

    Landon, I have always said as long as it shoots or I feel the same as if I had shot a big wad, I'm fine with it.
     
  10. Bbucko

    Gold Member

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    I've always been easily bored by someone with no sense of humor, especially in the bedroom. What is sex without joy, and what's joy without laughter?

    Orgasm and ejaculating are not always the same thing. When I'm really up and running, especially during a long session of edging, my entire body shudders and quakes in near-continuous orgasm. This can last for hours.

    In contrast, the actual ejaculation, even a spectacular one, rarely lasts more than, say, 3-5 minutes. Getting your body to sing and vibrate is much more satisfying.
     
  11. B_boynextdoorkpt

    B_boynextdoorkpt New Member

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    What is edging and how can I do it?
     
  12. Big Swinging Dick

    Big Swinging Dick New Member

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    Edging during sex is the same as edging during masturbation. Think about when you're jerking off. You can crank out a load real quick or you can go at it for an hour or two if you slow down whenever you're getting close to cumming. No doubt you've edged during masturbation. Just do the same thing when you're having sex. Slow down the pace. Concentrate on something else but not too much so you lose your erection. Then pick up the pace.

    You know those guys that fuck for hours? That's what they're doing. Edging.
     
  13. bbristow

    bbristow New Member

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    ^ isn't edging kinda like stopping before reaching the point of no return, then restarting after a while?
     
  14. open501s

    open501s Member

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    there is another thread here about being " pee shy ".

    a problem I had for a long time was " cum shy ".

    It took a lot of work but I did get over it :evil:
     
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