Sleeping with wives/girlfriends of friends - right or wrong?

elvid

Cherished Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Posts
409
Media
0
Likes
288
Points
208
Location
London (Greater London, England)
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I've had sexual relationships with quite a few wives and girlfriends of male friends, without my friends knowing about it. I've never gone after these women, they've always approached me for sex.

Now, before you judge... I would say that in each case, the women have been unhappy about the sexual side of their relationships, which has made the women feel unhappy generally. So, if by having sex outside their relationship makes them feel happier, in your opinion is it right or wrong to accept their advances?
 

n3150n

Experimental Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
May 23, 2013
Posts
72
Media
20
Likes
16
Points
143
Location
UK
Verification
View
Gender
Male
Sex should be between two (or more!) consenting adults. After that it's just a simple calculation of whether the benefits (pleasure/satisfaction) outweigh the risks (being caught/breaking up relationships). I don't think the simple act of consensual sex is ever "wrong" as such, but maybe it's not worth the risk if the chance of discovery/retribution is high or the woman is likely to want more than you are prepared to give.

If you can make people happy then that's got to be a positive thing surely! A balancing act though if their partners are the jealous sort...
 

elvid

Cherished Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Posts
409
Media
0
Likes
288
Points
208
Location
London (Greater London, England)
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
If you can make people happy then that's got to be a positive thing surely! A balancing act though if their partners are the jealous sort...

Yes. I agree. Clearly, these are not situations you go into if you think you're going to get caught... because that could cause a lot of unhappiness. Having said, sometimes, "things happen" in the heat of the moment that seem beyond risky in hindsight.

In my experience, women are usually pretty good at hiding their tracks... much more so than men. Obviously it's a generalisation, but women often seem so much better at spotting when a partner is cheating on them than vice versa.
 

nudeyorker

Admired Member
Joined
Nov 6, 2006
Posts
22,744
Media
0
Likes
776
Points
208
Location
NYC/Honolulu
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Just a thought but maybe they should be talking with their husband or boyfriend and not you about their issues. You are not really a friend if you are sleeping with their partners.
 

n3150n

Experimental Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
May 23, 2013
Posts
72
Media
20
Likes
16
Points
143
Location
UK
Verification
View
Gender
Male
Is it just coincidence that your name is anagram of "devil"? ;-)

I wanted to add that I personally would ask my partner if she would be ok with me sleeping with a particular person, just because I wouldn't want to risk hurting her if she found out later. I'm not sure I'd ever want take the risk of hurting my friends by doing anything behind their back, but I think it would depend a lot on the woman's reasons (and attractiveness let's be honest) as well as your own history with her.

Not sure if this is even slightly realistic, but you could suggest to the other party that they try and feel out whether they might do the same with their partner (no names though, just see how the concept goes down!). Obviously this could backfire - if he says "never" he might then be insanely suspicious. On the other hand it may be the kick he needs to realize that she's unhappy and make changes to fix it. And if he's ok with her having a bit on the side (with assurances of discretion etc) then you've got a perfect setup.

All about playing the probabilities for maximum benefit at minimum risk!
 
Last edited:

mikeyinbrooklyn

Legendary Member
Joined
Jun 4, 2006
Posts
1,196
Media
77
Likes
1,024
Points
333
Location
DuBois (Pennsylvania, United States)
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
Elvid, clearly you are just posting to stir things up. It is not possible to sleep with a friend's wife or gf, because if you would do it you are not a friend.

On the off chance that this situation happened to you once, let alone repeatedly, that is repulsive of both them and you. Worse of them, obviously, because they are the cheaters. But pretty terrible of you, too.

What's wrong with people? Ain't there no decency left?
 

puckman4

Experimental Member
Joined
Nov 4, 2011
Posts
351
Media
0
Likes
6
Points
53
Location
mid atlantic
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I've had sexual relationships with quite a few wives and girlfriends of male friends, without my friends knowing about it. I've never gone after these women, they've always approached me for sex.

Now, before you judge... I would say that in each case, the women have been unhappy about the sexual side of their relationships, which has made the women feel unhappy generally. So, if by having sex outside their relationship makes them feel happier, in your opinion is it right or wrong to accept their advances?
I'm calling bull shit. I've been sexually active for 39 years and considered a vary attractive man, I've certainly had plenty of friends wives get flirty with me, but ask me to fuck them, not once let alone several times.
If this is actually true your a creep not a friend
 

Mr 9r

Expert Member
Joined
Apr 5, 2008
Posts
189
Media
0
Likes
135
Points
263
Location
herenthere
Sexuality
99% Straight, 1% Gay
Gender
Male
I'm calling bull shit. I've been sexually active for 39 years and considered a vary attractive man, I've certainly had plenty of friends wives get flirty with me, but ask me to fuck them, not once let alone several times.
If this is actually true your a creep not a friend

^^My thoughts as well^^
 

NC_BBC

Expert Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2011
Posts
2,365
Media
8
Likes
107
Points
83
Location
Usually in NC, but I travel, so ask me where I am
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I can't even take the fuckin' threads here serious anymore. I seriously doubt any of this garbage is true,but in the OFF chance there is a shread of validity to your OP, you are a shitty person. Definitely not a friend. You're just some creppy guy who hangs with guys who have shitty, whoreish girlfriends.

I don't know how things work where you're from, but where I live "don't fuck my girlfriend" is pretty high on the list of friend duties. Right under "tell me if you find out my girlfriend is cheating on me"

Troll or not, the world needs less people like you in it.
 

Exbiker

Superior Member
Joined
Jun 17, 2010
Posts
3,182
Media
10
Likes
2,848
Points
258
Location
Ascot (Windsor and Maidenhead, England)
Sexuality
90% Gay, 10% Straight
Gender
Male
I'm inclined to agree with the system of morals that Immanuel Kant derived from his categorical imperative... A couple of hundred years ago ...

Ask yourself - would you be happy if everyone always acted in the way you propose?

It's very clearly wrong.
 

RubberHarley

Cherished Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2006
Posts
882
Media
4
Likes
255
Points
188
Location
Houston
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I have a friend at work and we sometimes workout afterwards. Of course he knows my dick size, etc. due to being in the shower after a workout. It seems he discussed me with his girlfriend one night. Damn if she didn't hit on me the next day. At first I told her that she was with my friend and should be loyal to him. She said, "He told me the size of your dick and I want all of that inside me right now!" She said said she could handle me. i could not resist, and sure enough she took all of me. They stayed together for some time but eventually broke up.
 

Jsamine

Experimental Member
Joined
Nov 12, 2013
Posts
168
Media
0
Likes
12
Points
53
Location
Boston
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
I'm all for consenting adults doing whatever they want whether they are married, involved or not. But friends significant others are completely off limits unless your friend gives the ok first! Some of you guys might have big cocks, but you guys have no balls!!!!!!!! And rubberharley..... you aren't that big so get over yourself with the "I want all of that inside me right now!"
 
Last edited:

elvid

Cherished Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Posts
409
Media
0
Likes
288
Points
208
Location
London (Greater London, England)
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I'm all for consenting adults doing whatever they want whether they are married, involved or not. But friends significant others are completely off limits unless your friend gives the ok first!

I don't entirely disagree with you. For example, I would never proactively hit on the significant other of a friend. It would never enter my head to do that. However, when these women have made plays for me, and they've spoken to me about their relationships, I can understand why they're unhappy and why they want to turn to someone else.

I would agree too with another poster above that said it would be better if they spoke about the issues in their relationships with the boyfriends/husbands, instead of talking with me... The only thing is, it seems that a lot of guys are not good about talking about these kind of aspects of relationships. I get the impression that they talk to me because they feel they can't talk to their husbands/boyfriends.
 

NC_BBC

Expert Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2011
Posts
2,365
Media
8
Likes
107
Points
83
Location
Usually in NC, but I travel, so ask me where I am
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I don't entirely disagree with you. For example, I would never proactively hit on the significant other of a friend. It would never enter my head to do that. However, when these women have made plays for me, and they've spoken to me about their relationships, I can understand why they're unhappy and why they want to turn to someone else.

I would agree too with another poster above that said it would be better if they spoke about the issues in their relationships with the boyfriends/husbands, instead of talking with me... The only thing is, it seems that a lot of guys are not good about talking about these kind of aspects of relationships. I get the impression that they talk to me because they feel they can't talk to their husbands/boyfriends.

You can't be serious...
 

hammer3342

Legendary Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jun 24, 2013
Posts
628
Media
35
Likes
1,433
Points
313
Location
Connecticut, United States of America (the)
Verification
View
Sexuality
80% Gay, 20% Straight
Gender
Male
op.. what the hell is wrong with you.I dont care if my buddys girlfriend was a supermodel. getting involved,makes you the biggest douche out there. If you were my so called friend. I beat the shit out of you, then spit in your eye. no wonder your single.
 

elvid

Cherished Member
Joined
Mar 4, 2010
Posts
409
Media
0
Likes
288
Points
208
Location
London (Greater London, England)
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
If you were my so called friend. I beat the shit out of you...

Well, that would be aggravated assault. You'll end up in jail if you go around being excessively violent to people. That's because beating the shit out of people is AGAINST THE LAW. On the other hand, two consenting adults having sex is entirely within the law (at least, it is where I live).