so called "Cougar"?

[madame_zora]

FEAST YOUR EYES, I SAY.

Holy shit, that's scary!

Surfergirl, the last time we had this discussion, it was just about older women with younger men- it wasn't about women who try to ACT younger than they are. If I'm with a younger guy, I want him to know he's fucking a 43 year old women, otherwose it would just be creepy. I never thought twice about having an affair with a 53 year old guy when I was 26, so what's the difference? Nothing.

 

[SurferGirlCA]

... Surfergirl, the last time we had this discussion, it was just about older women with younger men- it wasn't about women who try to ACT younger than they are. If I'm with a younger guy, I want him to know he's fucking a 43 year old women, otherwose it would just be creepy. I never thought twice about having an affair with a 53 year old guy when I was 26, so what's the difference? Nothing.

Why am I being brought into this, MZ??? :tongue:

 

[transformer_99]

Holy shit, that's scary!

Surfergirl, the last time we had this discussion, it was just about older women with younger men- it wasn't about women who try to ACT younger than they are. If I'm with a younger guy, I want him to know he's fucking a 43 year old women, otherwose it would just be creepy. I never thought twice about having an affair with a 53 year old guy when I was 26, so what's the difference? Nothing.

Not even if he was making your car, insurance or rent payment ? :biggrin1::wink:

See that's the difference, do an old bag and all you get is sex, have a "sugar daddy" and he helps you thru college. :biggrin1::wink:

 

[SurferGirlCA]

See that's the difference, do an old bag and all you get is sex, have a "sugar daddy" and he helps you thru college. :biggrin1::wink:

Ohhhh, you're gonna get letters.

 

[ClaireTalon]

I could possibly fuel a lot of thought fires here with stories about a very sexy, hot-bodied and pretty hung (not super-hung) early-20s guy I'm currently seeing. Actually, since the beginning of the year. I say seeing, because we're not dating; Except for an eventual drink somewhere we've never gone out. We don't even have much to talk about, it's really a matter of mere sex. He comes to me two, three times a week, we have sex, have something for dinner, have some more sex and he leaves, and I'm quite happy with that. I don't want more, and he has a girlfriend, who doesn't want to have sex with him yet; I guess she'll be very surprised once she does have sex with him, and wonder where his abilities have come from.

I guess Madame Zora got another point here, the thing that makes us sexy in the eyes of younger men is that we don't try to behave younger than we are. It's not even what these boys want from us, if they want a twenties girl, there are more than enough real ones out there. But a lady acting like one promises something unique for them. Lol, I remember how I met this young stud, he was actually together with a few of his friends, who all dropped their faces into their drinks when he and I had our first drinks together. I guess they were reading the signals between him and me from their end of the bar, and knew he had landed the jackpot, including the power ball ;-) Well, he said it had raised their respect for him a lot.

 

[karmen]

I'm 24 and like older women (for exemple between 28-38 for me but it depends and age in itself doesnt mean anything and younger or older can also be good...) ! I think it's often more exciting and interesting. Not only on the sexual side. An attractive woman, older, ....How to say that : it's a turn on !


I don't know really why, but I feel better with a girl who is older. She makes me more confident...
Maybe it is more easy too, when you're a big boy to be with a woman who is not affraid... I don't know how to express it...It is more simple.

Am I the only man in this case? (I think I'm not !)

And for women who prefer younger guy : what are you looking for in younger guy ?

thanks!:

Parisian:

I think that a sexy woman is a sexy woman--period. It's good that you go for what you want. I think too many young men are so trying to impress their mates that they don't always go for what they want.

Think of all the good relationship that we've all missed out on because we fear what others will think of the choice(s) that we've made. You know what I'm talking about--he's too young, too old, too dark, too pale, too poor, too rich, too fat, too skinny, too short, too tall, wrong religion, wrong social status--hell the list goes on and on.

I, myself, still prefer older guys. The closest I've come to dating a younger guy is when I've dated someone my own age. I just think older guys rock.

I figure if a guy has it going on in his 30s and 40s then he's going to get even better in his 50s and 60s. All older men are NOT created equal. And the exact same thing can be said about older women (MILFs or Cougars or whatever term you wish to use.)

Among other things, I'm looking for the experience and knowledge that an older man has to offer. I like being introduced to new adventures inside and outside of the bedroom. But, hey that's just my opinion. :wink:

Hugs and Kisses,

Karmen

 

[transformer_99]

Ohhhh, you're gonna get letters.

Not really, I don't think that I'm not that naive, to be able to understand that this kind of stuff doesn't go on. In the case of older man, younger woman, it's not too uncommon for the older man to be better funded than the younger men that the younger woman has choice to be with. Big dick or not, shopping sprees, going to finer restaurants, riding in higher end automobiles are perks for the older set. I hardly doubt a 20 something is going to go hang out with an older guy who drives a 10 year old Honda Civic or similar. And I won't say there aren't cases where the younger male is getting incentive based perks from wealthier older women just the same. And that's not to say either circumstance is or isn't purely sexual either, but you have to admit, that on a case by case basis, you could separate and isolate the pluses and minuses of each relationship.

 

[SurferGirlCA]

Not really, I don't think that I'm not that naive, to be able to understand that this kind of stuff doesn't go on. In the case of older man, younger woman, it's not too uncommon for the older man to be better funded than the younger men that the younger woman has choice to be with. Big dick or not, shopping sprees, going to finer restaurants, riding in higher end automobiles are perks for the older set. I hardly doubt a 20 something is going to go hang out with an older guy who drives a 10 year old Honda Civic or similar. And I won't say there aren't cases where the younger male is getting incentive based perks from wealthier older women just the same. And that's not to say either circumstance is or isn't purely sexual either, but you have to admit, that on a case by case basis, you could separate and isolate the pluses and minuses of each relationship.

Uhhhh, it was your choice of references as to each gender I thought might raise eyebrows... not your argument. :smile:

 

[transformer_99]

Uhhhh, it was your choice of references as to each gender I thought might raise eyebrows... not your argument. :smile:

It would take substantially more than my reference to roust/ruffle a cougar. Besides mine still may be coming as a past due bill, the real battle royale is going on in the thread as to whether a woman can have too many sex partners. :wink:

 

[Pumblechook]

Is it not possible that two people from different age groups could just like each other like anyone else? I don't think this would have to be all about money/sex at all.

The hardest part it seems would be meeting, since social boundaries tend to prevent people from differing age groups from interacting with each other in the same places where they would meet people of their own age group.

And I also agree with Karmen, sexy is sexy, age is not a limiter.

 

[naughty]

Whew!

After reading the mulitple definitions of a cougar I can say unequivocably that I am NOT one! Unfortunately, I think cougars may be a product of a society who still does not fully appreciate the assets that a mature woman in her sexual prime bring to the table.

 

[Ethyl]

I've dated several younger men and recently met someone who is 9 years my junior. After reading through this thread, I don't know that I fit the generalized lurid definitions of "cougar". I'm not a "MILF" (I don't have children). I don't have a fake orange tan. I enjoy being 36. Most of the younger men i've bedded pursued me, rather than the other way around.

It's funny to see nasty comments from posters about "old bags" mixed with honest posts from other women regularly bedding younger men who keep coming back for more. Guess our zero complaint policy in the sack speaks for itself.

 

[B_horribleperson]

FEAST YOUR EYES, I SAY.

i think i just threw up a little in my mouth

i hope she didnt have to pay for any of that work she got done.

 

[transformer_99]

Is it not possible that two people from different age groups could just like each other like anyone else? I don't think this would have to be all about money/sex at all.

The hardest part it seems would be meeting, since social boundaries tend to prevent people from differing age groups from interacting with each other in the same places where they would meet people of their own age group.

And I also agree with Karmen, sexy is sexy, age is not a limiter.

Oh, you mean like Anna Nicole Smith being with an 80 year old man isn't the same as a 20 something going for/being approached by a 40+ cougar ? I guess it's possible in a vacuum, devoid of any external factors. Don't get the wrong impression, I never said it was good or bad, it's really between those two individuals and they both need to evaluate their true motives and play it out between themselves.

 

[transformer_99]

I've dated several younger men and recently met someone who is 9 years my junior. After reading through this thread, I don't know that I fit the generalized lurid definitions of "cougar". I'm not a "MILF" (I don't have children). I don't have a fake orange tan. I enjoy being 36. Most of the younger men i've bedded pursued me, rather than the other way around.

It's funny to see nasty comments from posters about "old bags" mixed with honest posts from other women regularly bedding younger men who keep coming back for more. Guess our zero complaint policy in the sack speaks for itself.

Touche, as you are 36 and appear "hot/hard bodied" for 36, it's all relative. In the case where the guy being 9 years your junior, that's 27, the guy has had an opportunity to get out of HS, perhaps gone to college, start a career and so on. So is that really a cougar situation even ? I mean ,depending upon the 27 year old, you might be in better shape than the 27 year old will ever be at any stage of their life, both mentally and physically. There are so many factors/variables involved in anything. To take my quick replies as my total response to it all is myopic. The term "cougar" was thrown out by another, the definition is what it is, I made remarks based upon that, hardly a a case by case situational analysis. The original post, a 24 year old interested only in 28-38, 38 could be a stretch even if the roles were reversed. And for a 38 yo to pursue the 24 yo male, that's a borderline call too. 24 yo, at best one could be a year or two out of college and that's if they had themselves together. I'd seriously have to question your or anyone else's judgement (mine included) for hooking up with anyone that just left their HS graduation ceremony, and that is the part of the topic of another thread about ex-sex.

I guess I could have been a little more tactful/less abrasive and not gone as far as "old bag", but it's too late at this stage. Sometimes you have to call it what it is and don't hold back, especially when being candidly open and honest ?

 

[SurferGirlCA]

To take my quick replies as my total response to it all is myopic.

Well, people are prolly going to respond (or not) to what you choose to post... not the entire breadth of your opinion on a topic you may or may not choose to share. This is LPSG, not the Psychic Friends Network.

The term "cougar" was thrown out by another, the definition is what it is, I made remarks based upon that, hardly a a case by case situational analysis.

The "cougar" discussion has been had here before. The supposed definition is any woman dating/seeing/screwing any man 7+ years her junior, particularly if she has an ongoing preference in that regard.

The original post, a 24 year old interested only in 28-38, 38 could be a stretch even if the roles were reversed.

Meaning a 38 year-old man with a 24 year-old woman? Ummm, right, which is why someone had to come up with a new label to apply to women who go for younger guys (cougars), whereas when the roles are reversed and it's an older man going for a younger woman, he is referred to as... a man (if anyone even notices).

I guess I could have been a little more tactful/less abrasive and not gone as far as "old bag", but it's too late at this stage. Sometimes you have to call it what it is and don't hold back, especially when being candidly open and honest ?

So every "cougar" is automatically an old bag? :tongue: Your "honesty" is just your opinion, dude. Your choice to put sugar daddy in quotes and leave old bag without quotes in your earlier post suggests your own gender stereotyping issues.

 

[transformer_99]

I like this, point by point rebuttal that is:

"Well, people are prolly going to respond (or not) to what you choose to post... not the entire breadth of your opinion on a topic you may or may not choose to share. This is LPSG, not the Psychic Friends Network."

So what's the beef, I don't assume that anyone's post is all encompassing to thier total opinion on any subject, I don't crucify anyone for that. So what would being psychic have to do with that ? Just know that it's a brief response there's much more to read between what is posted and thought.

"The supposed definition is any woman dating/seeing/screwing any man 7+ years her junior, particularly if she has an ongoing preference in that regard."

This would be a summarized definition, it leaves out many of the important concepts and traits that the actual definition lists. When your definition becomes the hard and fast accepted overall definition of the concept, I will give you your point on the argument. When the definition is what it is, alteration of it or selective filtering voids your arguments, you are no longer talking about a cougar, you are referring to another animal/cat altogether. How can we have a discussion/debate when the ground rules aren't perceived in the same terms ? By your definition, a 38 year old and a 30-31 year old indicate a cougar on the prowl. I'm on record as indicating as 36 &/vs 27 year old relationship may not even be a cougar situation. Your definition clearly puts mercurialbliss as a cougar, the real definition doesn't.

"Meaning a 38 year-old man with a 24 year-old woman? Ummm, right, which is why someone had to come up with a new label to apply to women who go for younger guys (cougars), whereas when the roles are reversed and it's an older man going for a younger woman, he is referred to as... a man (if anyone even notices)."

You and any other female that feels inequity and injustices are free to coin a term for males that do similar. I'm sure they already exist, males may be unaware of them, maybe they haven't caught on. But in that regard, trust me, there are just as many guys that think it's interesting to say the least when they see it happening whether it be older male-younger female or vice versa.

Originally Posted by transformer_99
I guess I could have been a little more tactful/less abrasive and not gone as far as "old bag", but it's too late at this stage. Sometimes you have to call it what it is and don't hold back, especially when being candidly open and honest ?
So every "cougar" is automatically an old bag?

Your "honesty" is just your opinion, dude. Your choice to put sugar daddy in quotes and leave old bag without quotes in your earlier post suggests your own gender stereotyping issues.

Every cougar an "old bag" ? According to the definition wouldn't you say that's implied ? That's odd, you quote me, yet "old bag" is clearly within quotation marks after calling me out on not doing so. Sometimes I catch it, other times I don't. I don't stereotype genders so there are no issues in that regard. Again, I was working with a definition that other's had laid out in my post. I'm hardly Webster when it comes to defining or categorizing. Any of the terms I use weren't of my making, I did choose them to post, interpret them as points of references for a varied audience, but hardly something I manufactured as a definition.

 

[jeff black]

BAH,

An older woman is very attractive, just like a younger one. Provided they are over 18, I am all for it!

 

[Mr. Snakey]

I'm 24 and like older women (for exemple between 28-38 for me but it depends and age in itself doesnt mean anything and younger or older can also be good...) ! I think it's often more exciting and interesting. Not only on the sexual side. An attractive woman, older, ....How to say that : it's a turn on !


I don't know really why, but I feel better with a girl who is older. She makes me more confident...
Maybe it is more easy too, when you're a big boy to be with a woman who is not affraid... I don't know how to express it...It is more simple.

Am I the only man in this case? (I think I'm not !)

And for women who prefer younger guy : what are you looking for in younger guy ?

thanks!:

Nothing wrong with that thats great Good luck!

 

[SurferGirlCA]

So what's the beef, I don't assume that anyone's post is all encompassing to thier total opinion on any subject, I don't crucify anyone for that. So what would being psychic have to do with that ? Just know that it's a brief response there's much more to read between what is posted and thought.

:tongue: If you think you're being "crucified", you should read through a lot more of the old threads to gain some perspective.

The point is people are going to read your posts and assume it reflects how you feel on a topic. Duh. To complain that someone read your posts and questioned you about them without considering the fact that you might have other thoughts on the subject is weak. You've also posted repeatedly in this thread, not just one "brief" response, so you've had several opportunities to alter/expand on your earlier posts. Like I said, what you choose to post is what people will respond to - that's basically the way online message board dialogue happens.

"The supposed definition is any woman dating/seeing/screwing any man 7+ years her junior, particularly if she has an ongoing preference in that regard."

This would be a summarized definition, it leaves out many of the important concepts and traits that the actual definition lists. When your definition becomes the hard and fast accepted overall definition of the concept, I will give you your point on the argument.

Where is this "actual definition" of which you speak? The urbandictionary.com one? Yeah, a site that allows any one to submit their own interpretation of words/phrases (one qualification listed there is that all cougars have to wear pink nail polish :tongue; I hope you aren't using that as a source. As I mentioned, this topic was discussed before you joined the boards here. Maybe you should check out this ABC News link interviewing the woman who first brought the term to the public eye when her book on the "phenomenon" was published...

"May 5, 2005 -- What do Samantha on "Sex and the City," and Gabrielle on "Desperate Housewives" have in common? Sex and relationships columnist Valerie Gibson would call them "cougars" — women who date men more than eight years their junior — and they're part of a trend that's coming off the screen and out of the bedroom."

http://abcnews.go.com/Primetime/Health/story?id=731599&page=1

That definition is purely mathetmatical. I am 31, so if I date a guy 23 or younger, I am a cougar. If mercurialbliss is with a guy nine years younger, she's a cougar. It does not break women into age groups or cast aspersions on them, which is a lot less subjective than the definition(s) you seem to favor.

By your definition, a 38 year old and a 30-31 year old indicate a cougar on the prowl. I'm on record as indicating as 36 &/vs 27 year old relationship may not even be a cougar situation. Your definition clearly puts mercurialbliss as a cougar, the real definition doesn't.

No, but according to the definition provided by the woman who wrote the book that brought it all to light, it does. :smile:

"Meaning a 38 year-old man with a 24 year-old woman? Ummm, right, which is why someone had to come up with a new label to apply to women who go for younger guys (cougars), whereas when the roles are reversed and it's an older man going for a younger woman, he is referred to as... a man (if anyone even notices)."

You and any other female that feels inequity and injustices are free to coin a term for males that do similar. I'm sure they already exist, males may be unaware of them, maybe they haven't caught on. But in that regard, trust me, there are just as many guys that think it's interesting to say the least when they see it happening whether it be older male-younger female or vice versa.

Yeah, I am sure there are lots of guys who think it's "interesting" when Sean Connery is paired up with Catherine Zeta-Jones as a love interest in a movie. There's a difference between thinking it's interesting (or being envious of it) when it's older man-younger woman and questioning it in a different way when the gender roles are reversed.

Every cougar an "old bag" ? According to the definition wouldn't you say that's implied ?

According to the definition that was first used to break this story, I for sure would not say that's implied.

That's odd, you quote me, yet "old bag" is clearly within quotation marks after calling me out on not doing so.

Ummmmmmm, no, scroll back to your post. It's not.

Any of the terms I use weren't of my making, I did choose them to post, interpret them as points of references for a varied audience, but hardly something I manufactured as a definition.

No, but your choice to write "sugar daddy" (quotes) vs. old bag (no quotes) in the same sentence implies you're denoting the first as a term used by the larger society while the second is your own personal interpretation. My reason for even calling you out on this to begin with is that there is still clearly a double standard about this, no matter how in vogue cougars may be at the moment. Maybe that's not how you meant it, but, again, people are going to respond to what you choose to post... not what you also/in addition to/if asked on another day might say on the topic. :smile: