So, how important is truth to you in your life.

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223790

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For me, my word is my bond, and a handshake actually means something. Sadly, this isn't the case for everyone. When people lie to me, they lose my trust forever, and I will never believe them or have any dealings with them again.
 

Alex22876

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The world isn’t black and white.

If you expect it to be, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. Yes, there are times when people lie intentionally to you. But the vast majority of times an action is not a precise replication of what was said is because 1) a difference in interpretation, 2) misremembering or 3) external factor.

Expecting someone to live and act by an implied transcript of verbal contracts between people is self centered.

:)
 
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EllieP

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I work with very busy people. They give me their word that they will follow through on what they agreed to do. Sometimes that doesn't happen. And it's not because they lied. It's because other situations have arisen that forces them to alter the agreement.

But sometimes they do lie. Sometimes they have no intention of doing what they agreed to. They are marked. And they are ostracized. If they are employed by me they no longer will be.

On a personal level I have a child who would sometimes withhold the truth and sometimes give alternate facts. That was a very difficult period to work through, but it was worth mending.

I was married to a habitual liar. He could not tell the truth even if it was convenient for him. That's what I cannot understand! What type of pathology he displayed I could never fathom. But he simply could not tell me the truth. That was not worth mending, and in fact, I let it go too long.

I don't lie for the simple fact that my memory is not the best, and you have to remember too many stories.
 

Enid

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I will concede that lies of omission are okay in some cases. For instance, I won't tell my dad i smoke pot sometimes. Or stuff like that.

Otherwise, truth is important and beyond little white lies like oh I feel fine or whatnot (when I'm dying inside), I will always be truthful when and where it counts. If it concerns something that is hurtful to someone else, then I'll consider the value of the truth and whether it's prudent to share and move forward from there.
 

MisterB

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I learned the importance of telling the truth at an early age when caught lying by my Mother. Rather than punish me, she sat me down and talked with me about the importance of telling the truth. I remember that day like it was last week.

I remember she closed with the line (I'm paraphrasing here): The truth is easy to remember because you experienced it. You'll always have trouble remembering a lie, especially when you are asked to repeat it more than once.

That little life's nugget has stuck with me.

So yeah, truth is important in my life. Like @Enid said above, lying by omission can be okay. Cuz her example hit home with me. Sometimes it's just not necessary to share everything!
 

LaFemme

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Truth is pretty important to me. I’m going to be kind whenever possible, but sometimes hard truths need to be told. And sometimes one needs to keep one’s mouth shut. The key is knowing the difference.

I try to be ethical in my work and personal life. When I give my word, it means something. I have a good reputation and I’m proud of that.

I try to be honest with myself. I try to fix what’s wrong, be curious about myself and not lie to myself. It’s the only way to grow.
 
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944592

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I struggle with this one.

I have always believed that telling the truth was absolutely crucial in all things.

I still hold to this, but how do I reconcile this with the two years, almost a decade ago, that I spent cheating on my wife with an active secret life in the swinging world?

Lust won out over truth and honesty in that period of my life. It ended with me realizing how my integrity was in the toilet, quitting my activities cold turkey, and confessing to my wife, in that order.

I restored truth to my life and our relationship, but I caused her an enormous amount of pain. We worked through it with counseling and decided to stay together, ultimately strengthening our relationship.

I believe truth must be told, but as human beings, along with our strengths, there will always be weaknesses that show up.

Confession is good for the soul, it is said.

I hate that I hurt my wife. AND, I had a hell of a lot of great sex in those two years. I wish I could still do it, but my marriage is more important to me.
 
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I work with very busy people. They give me their word that they will follow through on what they agreed to do. Sometimes that doesn't happen. And it's not because they lied. It's because other situations have arisen that forces them to alter the agreement.

But sometimes they do lie. Sometimes they have no intention of doing what they agreed to. They are marked. And they are ostracized. If they are employed by me they no longer will be.

On a personal level I have a child who would sometimes withhold the truth and sometimes give alternate facts. That was a very difficult period to work through, but it was worth mending.

I was married to a habitual liar. He could not tell the truth even if it was convenient for him. That's what I cannot understand! What type of pathology he displayed I could never fathom. But he simply could not tell me the truth. That was not worth mending, and in fact, I let it go too long.

I don't lie for the simple fact that my memory is not the best, and you have to remember too many stories.
There are some people who find it easier to lie than tell the truth. Pointless lies, often. Habitual. I avoid them like the plague.
 
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944592

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I answered the subject but not the original question. I find it much easier these days to forgive lies, at least white one or lies of omission. But the sheer affrontery of lies like Trump makes hourly make me sick to my stomach and are unforgivable.

I struggle with this one.

I have always believed that telling the truth was absolutely crucial in all things.

I still hold to this, but how do I reconcile this with the two years, almost a decade ago, that I spent cheating on my wife with an active secret life in the swinging world?

Lust won out over truth and honesty in that period of my life. It ended with me realizing how my integrity was in the toilet, quitting my activities cold turkey, and confessing to my wife, in that order.

I restored truth to my life and our relationship, but I caused her an enormous amount of pain. We worked through it with counseling and decided to stay together, ultimately strengthening our relationship.

I believe truth must be told, but as human beings, along with our strengths, there will always be weaknesses that show up.

Confession is good for the soul, it is said.

I hate that I hurt my wife. AND, I had a hell of a lot of great sex in those two years. I wish I could still do it, but my marriage is more important to me.
 

EllieP

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It is very difficult to shake one's faith in untruths even when confronted with incontrovertible evidence.

When I hear lies uttered by top leaders I immediately know they're not true. But I watch a believer, and for one instant they're stunned by such a falsehood. And then they shake it off and nod their heads in agreement.

To me that's scary as hell. And that's why I'm no longer religious.
 

LaFemme

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Getting lied to is tough. Political lies make me angry. Personal lies make me sad.

Most of the time when a friend, or family member lies to me - I know it. I just go with it. Let them lie to me, see how far they’ll take it. In fact I’ll force them to spin it out until they hang themselves with it. My trust is fairly is easy to have, but easy to lose and terribly difficult to earn back. Don’t fucking do it. My family knows that. Regrets it terribly. My trust is something worth having.
 
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Haggard_Wisdom

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I will concede that lies of omission are okay in some cases. For instance, I won't tell my dad i smoke pot sometimes. Or stuff like that.

Otherwise, truth is important and beyond little white lies like oh I feel fine or whatnot (when I'm dying inside), I will always be truthful when and where it counts. If it concerns something that is hurtful to someone else, then I'll consider the value of the truth and whether it's prudent to share and move forward from there.

This is important. If someone confides in you and asks to keep it secret and someone else connected with that person who may be affected by the truth asks about what was told to you in confidence I think a lie might become necessary. It might even be noble to lie depending on the situation.

Lies told out of malice or jealousy are usually unforgiveable in my opinion.
 
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ronin001

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I need to stop lying to myself about a lot of things Like

Buying something because i can afford it, when I really cannot; or Leaving home 30 minutes late, but telling myself, I will still be on time for work

I try to generally be truthful, though bending the truth now and again does help work proceed better