So who really goes by the urinal etiquette?

B_patrickmcc

Sexy Member
Joined
Jun 22, 2010
Posts
165
Media
0
Likes
61
Points
63
Upon emailing Miss Manners, received this reply:

Dear Kind Reader,
Of course there is a proper etiquette required when visiting a male public rest room, and I will be happy to outline the procedure. The need of evacuation is universal, and if the proper methods are followed, the process in a public environment will be of comfort to all. Let me begin with the steps of correct public urination, whether alone, or in a crowd. Upon entering the facility, determine the optimal urinal of choice. If premises are empty, proceed to the urinal closet to the exit. If the premises are occupied, proceed to the urinal furthest from the current occupant(s). Avoid the designated urinal for those with special needs, as the lower height may lead to the soiling of one’s clothing. Do not acknowledge the presence of other occupants, and maintain your head position exactly parallel to the facing wall. With your right hand, lower your zipper. You may now extract your evacuating device from your undergarment (this technique may vary, depending upon the design of said undergarment). Grasp said device with the left hand, index finger under, and thumb over, location approximately ¾ of an inch behind the device opening. Using this gentle grip, device should be pointed at an angle, determined by the operator, to insure stream will not ricochet back into the user. This may differ according to urinal design. Once flow has commenced, gentle patron should raise head, maintaining parallel status to front wall, until eyes are focused directly ahead. Upon termination of flow, user should once again lower head, and in a gentle method, briefly vacillate in an up and down direction, promptly return evacuator to undergarment, and raise zipper. Pivot 90 degrees quickly, and retreat from urinal area. Promptly proceed to lavatory, and cleanse hands with soap and warm water.

Common errors in urinal etiquette that must be avoided:
1) Verbally greeting other occupants, offering to shake hands, or “high five”.
2) Lowering one’s trousers over the buttocks
3) Idle chatter should be avoided, particularly common statements such as “Need to drain the monster”, “Whoa.. this water is really cold”, “It takes to hands to handle a whopper”, “wonder where that boil came from”, “Wish it didn’t burn every time I do this”, or “down boy! Down”
4) Placing both hands on the back of the head and gyrating one’s hips while exhaling audibly
5) Asking your fellow patron for help in stream guidance while lighting a cigarette
6) Skipping the lavatory, then upon return, pawing the crudités platter.

Hope this is of use to you, kind reader.

Miss Manners
 

simbablk

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Nov 16, 2005
Posts
2,271
Media
26
Likes
4,200
Points
368
Location
USA
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
When going to the restroom I find the empty one - don't really care if it's between two men or not - I gotta pee!

Don't really care if people take a peek. It happens. What can you do. Just DON'T stare! That's rude.

Simba
 

maxcok

Expert Member
Joined
Nov 17, 2009
Posts
7,153
Media
0
Likes
126
Points
83
Location
Elsewhere
Gender
Male
Upon emailing Miss Manners, received this reply:

Dear Kind Reader,
Of course there is a proper etiquette required when visiting a male public rest room, and I will be happy to outline the procedure. The need of evacuation is universal, and if the proper methods are followed, the process in a public environment will be of comfort to all. Let me begin with the steps of correct public urination, whether alone, or in a crowd. Upon entering the facility, determine the optimal urinal of choice. If premises are empty, proceed to the urinal closet to the exit. If the premises are occupied, proceed to the urinal furthest from the current occupant(s). Avoid the designated urinal for those with special needs, as the lower height may lead to the soiling of one’s clothing. Do not acknowledge the presence of other occupants, and maintain your head position exactly parallel to the facing wall. With your right hand, lower your zipper. You may now extract your evacuating device from your undergarment (this technique may vary, depending upon the design of said undergarment). Grasp said device with the left hand, index finger under, and thumb over, location approximately ¾ of an inch behind the device opening. Using this gentle grip, device should be pointed at an angle, determined by the operator, to insure stream will not ricochet back into the user. This may differ according to urinal design. Once flow has commenced, gentle patron should raise head, maintaining parallel status to front wall, until eyes are focused directly ahead. Upon termination of flow, user should once again lower head, and in a gentle method, briefly vacillate in an up and down direction, promptly return evacuator to undergarment, and raise zipper. Pivot 90 degrees quickly, and retreat from urinal area. Promptly proceed to lavatory, and cleanse hands with soap and warm water.

Common errors in urinal etiquette that must be avoided:
1) Verbally greeting other occupants, offering to shake hands, or “high five”.
2) Lowering one’s trousers over the buttocks
3) Idle chatter should be avoided, particularly common statements such as “Need to drain the monster”, “Whoa.. this water is really cold”, “It takes to hands to handle a whopper”, “wonder where that boil came from”, “Wish it didn’t burn every time I do this”, or “down boy! Down”
4) Placing both hands on the back of the head and gyrating one’s hips while exhaling audibly
5) Asking your fellow patron for help in stream guidance while lighting a cigarette
6) Skipping the lavatory, then upon return, pawing the crudités platter.

Hope this is of use to you, kind reader.

Miss Manners
..:chairfall::lmao::rofl: Fucking brilliant!!! Welcome to LPSG!

* "high fives" poster while lowering trousers below buttocks and gyrating hips in a celebratory manner *
 

thad

Experimental Member
Joined
Nov 19, 2005
Posts
53
Media
0
Likes
4
Points
153
Location
idaho,usa
Sexuality
80% Straight, 20% Gay
Gender
Male
Pee shy here. So I have issues. Pee shy means I can't pee in the urinal next to you, but have no problems if u see my cock - they are two different things altogether.
 

D_Martin van Burden

Account Disabled
Joined
Oct 6, 2002
Posts
3,229
Media
0
Likes
42
Points
258
So, if there are three urinals and the stalls are empty, I'll use one of them; otherwise, sorry, duty calls and I need to piss. If there are five, and the dudes take the far end, I'll take the middle, no problem. When I'm at the urinal, face is down or forward. I don't check other dudes out, and I'm oblivious if they are to me. It's usually not a big deal.
 
8

817051

Guest
The "urinal etiquette" is ridiculous. Of course if several urinals are free, I won't choose the one right next to another dude. But if there's only one free space, I won't wait for someone to be done, just because I might violate the "urinal etiquette". If this makes someone uncomfortable, I think they have a problem, not me.

If there are, for example, three or five stalls, I'll generally go for the far end. But that's just because I "like" the far end better. I'm not thinking "oh, yeah there's the urinal etiquette, I should choose the far end so the other dudes won't be bothered".
 
D

deleted871301

Guest
Pee shy here. So I have issues. Pee shy means I can't pee in the urinal next to you, but have no problems if u see my cock - they are two different things altogether.

Same here :redface:
 

MilstarSD

Expert Member
Joined
Aug 20, 2014
Posts
142
Media
0
Likes
188
Points
78
Location
San Diego, CA
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
A urinal is a urinal. Im there to do my business and leave. Ive had conversations with buds from work in there and will stand right next to them so not sure what the issue is. Ive seen them all in the shower and vice versa so not anything new
 

chigitychaunc

Sexy Member
Joined
Jan 15, 2008
Posts
218
Media
9
Likes
98
Points
113
Location
Central NJ
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I dont look at other guys because i dont care nor am i interested. Im not normally pee shy but at for instance a football game i have to use the stall bc if im cold it takes a solid 30 secs before imcan start to pee.
 

perthjames

Cherished Member
Joined
May 22, 2004
Posts
339
Media
0
Likes
300
Points
533
Location
Sydney (New South Wales, Australia)
Sexuality
No Response
Gender
Male
I was in China this year and experienced what I thought was the opposite of this. Literally every time I used a urinal, a guy would stand right next to me. Well, everyone except the Western guys - they would always stand at the opposite end of the urinal. The Asian guys didn't seem as worried.
 

frogman

Expert Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Aug 8, 2014
Posts
213
Media
21
Likes
196
Points
178
Location
Northeast
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Gay, 0% Straight
Gender
Male
The only 'urinal' etiquette I have heard of is if there is a row of them free don't pick the one next to someone who is peeing.

But if there is three urinals and the two on the ends are occupato and I gotta pee, I'm gonna use the one in the middle?!


Yup. And I've been in busy airports with long rows of urinals, all occupied. And yes, when one opens up, it gets taken.

If there is a row I won't take the one next to someone, but if there is only an open one next to someone else I'm going to use it.

Yes, I'm gay, but I'm in the bathroom to take a leak, not scope out other cocks. I don't care if you look at mine, but I'm not going to acknowledge you.
 

JohnDoeXXXm

Legendary Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Mar 12, 2007
Posts
2,246
Media
0
Likes
2,402
Points
443
Location
Houston, TX, USA
Verification
View
Sexuality
60% Straight, 40% Gay
Gender
Male
I went to a bar last night where the men's room has a 2-man trough along with a single toilet with a surrounding privacy stall. I think I went in there three times- and it's sooooo lame: all the guys there were doing the "leave a spot open" thing- if one guy was peeing at the urinal trough (either right or left side) the next guy to enter the room would go and piss into the toilet in the stall- rather than standing next to his brother at the trough.

I asked one guy about it (he was standing next to some girls at my table in the bar.) Interesting response- he said he always gets pee shy about peeing INDOORS- something about confined spaces, he said, and then continued- "If we were outside and peeing up on a tree I cold stand right next to you, practically touching cocks together and it wouldn't matter. Something about being in a confined space, vs being able to get away quickly if I was outside."

When will the madness stop!!!!!