Societal attitudes to high sex drives.

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deleted3782

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Are we expected to control the drive...?

I thinks its humorous when folks (males and females) act as if they must have sex on a regular basis, that sex is as necessary to them as eating or sleeping...and that without it, life is intolerable. People who exclaim "I haven't had sex in three days!" or "If my girlfriend has her period I won't get sex for five days!" get no sympathy from me. What's even worse is when people use their "high sex drive" as an opportunity for self-indulgence by having sex with others beyond knowledge of their partner. In my opinion, those folks need to get a grip and control their sex drive instead of having it control them...so yes...I expect of of you to control your sex drive. :nono:
 

RawDog

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Women with a high sex drive have it easier to find someone to drive their sex than men.

Two problems with that statement:

First, if the average "High Sex Drive" woman's criteria for choosing a guy to fuck were the same as a guy's I'd agree. The average woman is very picky in what guy she would deem as fuckable. Guys are typically horn dogs and will fuck anyone that says "Yes" to them, whereas a woman who may have the same libido would hold back satiating that hunger and pass Mr. GoodEnoughForNow to find Mr. Right.

Secondly, the typical guy may be hornier than the typical woman, but the typical woman can outlast, outfuck, outcum and recharge faster than most guys to begin with. So, if 2 horndogs meet passing through the night happen to hook-up, chances are the woman gets the short end of the stick performance-wise.

These are anecdotal observations from my short time observing women's sexual side. Am I on the right train of thought here?
 

B_subgirrl

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Why does a high sex drive necessarily result in multiple partners anyway?

It won't always, but if the person with the high sex drive is single there is a good chance it will.


I think what society disapproves of is promiscuity, with its inevitable results--
STDs, unwanted pregnancy, the "Jersey Shore" reality show...
[/QUOTE]

The results are not inevitable, although they do occur often when people are not responsible (and occasionally when they are). And it's not really because of these results that society disapproves. Society disapproves because it's attitude towards sex is stuck in the dark ages.


Women with a high sex drive have it easier to find someone to drive their sex than men.

There is some truth to this. If we are willing to settle for anyone, we probably do have it easier.


And: use of toys for masturbation is more accepted for women than for men.

True, but for me, as with many others (men and women) with high sex drives, masturbation just doesn't cut it. It doesn't even really take the edge off, it just encourages things and makes me hornier.



Two problems with that statement:

First, if the average "High Sex Drive" woman's criteria for choosing a guy to fuck were the same as a guy's I'd agree. The average woman is very picky in what guy she would deem as fuckable. Guys are typically horn dogs and will fuck anyone that says "Yes" to them, whereas a woman who may have the same libido would hold back satiating that hunger and pass Mr. GoodEnoughForNow to find Mr. Right.

Listen to Rawdog. He knows what he's talking about. Except I would have said Mr RightForNow :smile:


Secondly, the typical guy may be hornier than the typical woman, but the typical woman can outlast, outfuck, outcum and recharge faster than most guys to begin with. So, if 2 horndogs meet passing through the night happen to hook-up, chances are the woman gets the short end of the stick performance-wise.

Oh, this is so, so true. I have only ever met one guy who has a sex drive to match mine (although he still can't outcum me :biggrin1:). He's the only guy who has ever even come close to getting me to a point of absolute satisfaction and exhaustion - and he still hasn't quite achieved it.
 

D_Andreas Sukov

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I regret the Nobel Prizes cast to the curb, in pursuit of sex drives.

:rolleyes:
Lol! The sad thing is, i would of done better last semester if i had a lower sex drive. And wasnt such a lazy ass. Probably more the latter, but add a 50 minute walk and leaving a sexy women who is constantly horny and it always equals missed lectures and corsework deadlines.
 

B_subgirrl

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Lol! The sad thing is, i would of done better last semester if i had a lower sex drive. And wasnt such a lazy ass. Probably more the latter, but add a 50 minute walk and leaving a sexy women who is constantly horny and it always equals missed lectures and corsework deadlines.


I withdrew from two of my three subjects last semester because I was too horny to concentrate and couldn't keep up with my assignments.
 

D_Andreas Sukov

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Well, we'd both be working and then one would give the other the look, and we'd fuck and not do any more work.

We had to moderate it. She was better at it than me. Id be too horny to focus, she could be horny, write an essay then fuck.
 

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....
.... I have only ever met one guy who has a sex drive to match mine (although he still can't outcum me :biggrin1:). He's the only guy who has ever even come close to getting me to a point of absolute satisfaction and exhaustion - and he still hasn't quite achieved it.

Oh subgirrl :rolleyes: What a challenge!
 

B_subgirrl

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Well, we'd both be working and then one would give the other the look, and we'd fuck and not do any more work.

We had to moderate it. She was better at it than me. Id be too horny to focus, she could be horny, write an essay then fuck.

Damn those people who manage to get their work done first!



Oh subgirrl :rolleyes: What a challenge!

Apparently I'm even worse when drunk. It desensitises me so I can just keep going, and going, and going . . .
 

D_Barbi_Dahl

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I love this question! I think in the US we are very uptight compared to other countries (in general). People with high sex drives are typically judged and looked down upon unless they are in a monogomous relationship. Discussing one's sex life seems to be a pretty taboo thing to do in general.

Seems like most people talk about their significant other's lack of sex drive and somehow this topic of conversation is acceptable - perhaps because so many people can relate? But, take a single person with a high sex drive and immediately people start judging them.

I left my husband after basically 13 years of no sex and wanted nothing more than to make up for lost time. I was open and honest about my desires to fullfill that need. I am not/was not ashamed of anything I did - no regrets at all. However, I'm blown away by how many people think I was just horrible to have gone out and had *relations* without a relationship. To me it's a basic human need and we all deserve to have a fullfilling sex life if we want it. As a single person I shouldn't have to apologize to anyone nor should I be judged for it - but of course I was/am. I just wonder who it is who gets to decide how many partners is *too many* or when it's okay and not wrong - this sort of thing drives me nuts. I'm not sure why people look at those with a high sex drive and judge. I see people doing a lot worse things out there like being deceitful, mean, etc. It's crazy. People need to losen up. Sex between consentual adults doesn't hurt anyone if both partners take precautions to keep healthy -

I'm sure a loving relationship between two people (of any level of desire) makes sex great but that doesn't mean people who are not in love should not get to use those body parts that we were given and expected to use.

Long winded and rambling - sorry

Not rambling...you hit the nail on the head. This is pretty much my same situation. I love to have sex. I'm a sexually charged strong woman.Why should I not make up for lost time being in a boring, unsatisfying marriage? Ideally, I'll be in a long term, loving, relationship with someone who's sex drive and sexual preferences are compatible with mine. But until that time comes, I'm going to do what I need to do to be happy. And when I'm having lots of GOOD SEX, I'm happier.
 

D_Barbi_Dahl

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Two problems with that statement:

First, if the average "High Sex Drive" woman's criteria for choosing a guy to fuck were the same as a guy's I'd agree. The average woman is very picky in what guy she would deem as fuckable. Guys are typically horn dogs and will fuck anyone that says "Yes" to them, whereas a woman who may have the same libido would hold back satiating that hunger and pass Mr. GoodEnoughForNow to find Mr. Right.

Secondly, the typical guy may be hornier than the typical woman, but the typical woman can outlast, outfuck, outcum and recharge faster than most guys to begin with. So, if 2 horndogs meet passing through the night happen to hook-up, chances are the woman gets the short end of the stick performance-wise.

These are anecdotal observations from my short time observing women's sexual side. Am I on the right train of thought here?

You are BRILLIANT! And CORRECT.
 

D_Barbi_Dahl

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To Quote SubGirrl

[/QUOTE]
Oh, this is so, so true. I have only ever met one guy who has a sex drive to match mine (although he still can't outcum me :biggrin1:). He's the only guy who has ever even come close to getting me to a point of absolute satisfaction and exhaustion - and he still hasn't quite achieved it.[/QUOTE]

I've yet to meet someone who matches my sex drive on a sustained basis. Seems, I wear guys out. That's one of the reasons I prefer younger guys, they tend to keep up wiith me better...but I make them exhausted...No one outcums me either. I want sex at least daily, preferably multiple times per day. Morning and night!

Kinda sounds like I just threw out a challenge....ha ha.
 
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B_subgirrl

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I've yet to meet someone who matches my sex drive on a sustained basis. Seems, I wear guys out. That's one of the reasons I prefer younger guys, they tend to keep up wiith me better...but I make them exhausted...No one outcums me either. I want sex at least daily, preferably multiple times per day. Morning and night!

Kinda sounds like I just threw out a challenge....ha ha.


It seems we are on the same page, Red :smile:
 

RawDog

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True, but for me, as with many others (men and women) with high sex drives, masturbation just doesn't cut it. It doesn't even really take the edge off, it just encourages things and makes me hornier.

I keep saying that and people keep calling me a bullshitter (including my wife). Well said.

Listen to Rawdog. He knows what he's talking about.

I think I found my new signature, thanks (and thanks)!


Oh, this is so, so true. I have only ever met one guy who has a sex drive to match mine (although he still can't outcum me :biggrin1:). He's the only guy who has ever even come close to getting me to a point of absolute satisfaction and exhaustion - and he still hasn't quite achieved it.

Is this the 10-incher guy you were talking about on the other thread? What exactly does it take for you to be satiated? I know that's such a nebulous question, but sometimes the nebulous answer is clearer than you (or I) think.

You are BRILLIANT! And CORRECT.

Hmm, I may have to re-think my signature. I can have multiples! (Sigs unfortunately)

Thanks and thanks, Red.

I've yet to meet someone who matches my sex drive on a sustained basis. Seems, I wear guys out. That's one of the reasons I prefer younger guys, they tend to keep up wiith me better...but I make them exhausted...No one outcums me either. I want sex at least daily, preferably multiple times per day. Morning and night!

Same nebulous question I asked subgirrl, I ask you. What does it take? Are we talking internal time, number of orgasms, exhaustion, your pussy so raw from all the friction?

Kinda sounds like I just threw out a challenge....ha ha.

If I had a twin for every woman I wanted to sexually satisfy on this forum, I'd have ... hmm ... 15 twins!!
 

B_subgirrl

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I keep saying that and people keep calling me a bullshitter (including my wife). Well said.

Ahhh, the difference between a normal sex drive and an extremely high one.


I think I found my new signature, thanks (and thanks)!

You're welcome :smile:


Is this the 10-incher guy you were talking about on the other thread? What exactly does it take for you to be satiated? I know that's such a nebulous question, but sometimes the nebulous answer is clearer than you (or I) think.

It is indeed him :biggrin1:. I suppose satisfaction is the result of a whole lot of things, many of which I can't even pin down or vocalise.

Time is a massive factor. Most guys seem happy to stop after an hour or so. I always want to keep going for a whole lot longer than that.

Sheer number of orgasms is probably a factor. If every orgasm releases chemicals and hormones, eventually my system would have to be overloaded (you'd think). I know that the more orgasms I have, the more floaty my head space gets, so I suppose if someone gave me enough they could probably get me so spaced out I wouldn't even notice what they're doing any more. My FB has come close to this, but hasn't quite achieved it.

The biggest factor for me is probably the mindfuck. My FB is as into BDSM as I am and knows exactly which buttons to press. Vanilla sex could never completely satisfy me because this factor is conspicuously missing.

Size is unfortunately a factor. I say unfortunately because it always seems like such a superficial thing to say, but the fact of the matter is that small/average guys just can't give me orgasms as intense as big guys can. Only big guys can reach the deep spots.

I suspect that given an entire weekend with nothing to do but have sex, my FB could get me to that point of total satisfaction. Unfortunately we've never had the opportunity.

The problem is, that even when if I reached that point of complete satisfaction, it just wouldn't last long. A lot of people seem to think that a session of good sex should last you a few days at least. I don't even feel satisfied for a few hours (or minutes). I'll still be running the wonderful memories through my mind and enjoying them, but my body craves more.



I do enjoy a challenge :rolleyes:

If you were unmarried (or allowed to play) and in the same country as me, I might even take you up on it :biggrin1:
 
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D_Barbi_Dahl

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I keep saying that and people keep calling me a bullshitter (including my wife). Well said.



I think I found my new signature, thanks (and thanks)!




Is this the 10-incher guy you were talking about on the other thread? What exactly does it take for you to be satiated? I know that's such a nebulous question, but sometimes the nebulous answer is clearer than you (or I) think.



Hmm, I may have to re-think my signature. I can have multiples! (Sigs unfortunately)

Thanks and thanks, Red.



Same nebulous question I asked subgirrl, I ask you. What does it take? Are we talking internal time, number of orgasms, exhaustion, your pussy so raw from all the friction?



If I had a twin for every woman I wanted to sexually satisfy on this forum, I'd have ... hmm ... 15 twins!!

Short answer...I didn't say I wasn't satisfied. I've never had better sex in my whole life than I am right now. And I've had a lot of sex. But when the sex is amazing, I want more. I never get enough. I never get tired of sex, exhausted, bored. It's addicting. I have so many orgasms I lose count.

There was one fuckapallooza weekend in Vegas, in the LUV TUB suite when I was raw, bruised and so swollen that I could not be fucked anymore. But that was only once. And that was a little slice of heaven.
 

sbat

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I think younger people are not as accepting as people percieve. Alot of my friends, mostly male, think that im weird for having a high sex drive.

My partner has a high sex drive and she thinks she is weird. Self-judgement just shows how strong society's view is.

People will think you are weird if you are substantially different from the norm in any respect. The sex drive issue with women - I guess that depends on where you're from. Most of the girls in the circles I've been in have been open about their high sexuality, and at least publically act nonchalant about the little criticism they get about it. Although I did live in France, which has a very different general attitude about sex than mainstream US
 

RawDog

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I suppose satisfaction is the result of a whole lot of things, many of which I can't even pin down or vocalise.

You did a pretty awesome job describing it, by the way.

Time is a massive factor. Most guys seem happy to stop after an hour or so. I always want to keep going for a whole lot longer than that.

Unfortunately, it's probably more physical fatigue that hampers the best of us. Missionary is unbelievably tough on the arms if your're doing it for more than 30 minutes. The key (for me anyway) is trying to make the act of fucking as easy as possible on the muscles. If one set of muscles start getting fatigued, I find keeping a hard on hard gets too be difficult.

We have a moified sex swing where the seat's been converted so it feels like you're slouching on a chair instead of the biting straps that comes with it. The sex on that thing is so damned effortless (on her and my part) I can see it being used for hours on a stretch.

Sheer number of orgasms is probably a factor. If every orgasm releases chemicals and hormones, eventually my system would have to be overloaded (you'd think). I know that the more orgasms I have, the more floaty my head space gets, so I suppose if someone gave me enough they could probably get me so spaced out I wouldn't even notice what they're doing any more. My FB has come close to this, but hasn't quite achieved it.

Not meaning to brag (ok, maybe a bit), but on the, "Multiple/Highly Orgasmic Women (and the men who adore us =)" social group board, since there isn't much activity, I've been using that space as my personal orgasm log/journal. You might enjoy reading some of my entries (to make a long story short... 45 times in an hour and a half, 130 times in one whole weekend)

The biggest factor for me is probably the mindfuck. My FB is as into BDSM as I am and knows exactly which buttons to press. Vanilla sex could never completely satisfy me because this factor is conspicuously missing.

Here's where I fall short with my skills. I'd like to get better at this, but haven't had the opportunity to practice much. (my wife doesn't do the whole BDSM thing... an ex did though)

Size is unfortunately a factor. I say unfortunately because it always seems like such a superficial thing to say, but the fact of the matter is that small/average guys just can't give me orgasms as intense as big guys can. Only big guys can reach the deep spots.

Never apologize for having preferences, much less being honest about those preferences. I was telling my wife a few minutes ago that one of the draws of this forum was not only because the women are honest about what society labels as "superficial" preferences, but are celebrated as well.

The problem is, that even when if I reached that point of complete satisfaction, it just wouldn't last long. A lot of people seem to think that a session of good sex should last you a few days at least. I don't even feel satisfied for a few hours (or minutes). I'll still be running the wonderful memories through my mind and enjoying them, but my body craves more.

Ditto. Once again you've hit the nail on the head. I can identify with that wholeheartedly. Even after an orgasm, and I go soft and can't get hard again, I still want sex.

Short answer...I didn't say I wasn't satisfied. I've never had better sex in my whole life than I am right now.

When you said, "I've yet to meet someone who matches my sex drive on a sustained basis." I took from that that you hadn't been satisfied. I should've read that as not being satiated on a sustained basis. Totally different. Sorry for the confusion.

And I've had a lot of sex. But when the sex is amazing, I want more. I never get enough. I never get tired of sex, exhausted, bored. It's addicting. I have so many orgasms I lose count.

Yup, same here.

There was one fuckapallooza weekend in Vegas, in the LUV TUB suite when I was raw, bruised and so swollen that I could not be fucked anymore. But that was only once. And that was a little slice of heaven.

Love that feeling, wish I had it all the time. My wife loved the word "fuckapalooza" by the way.
 

B_subgirrl

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You did a pretty awesome job describing it, by the way.

Thanks :redface:


Unfortunately, it's probably more physical fatigue that hampers the best of us. Missionary is unbelievably tough on the arms if your're doing it for more than 30 minutes. The key (for me anyway) is trying to make the act of fucking as easy as possible on the muscles. If one set of muscles start getting fatigued, I find keeping a hard on hard gets too be difficult.
I didn't mean that they need to keep hammering me for hours (although it would be nice - the more, the better :biggrin1:). But with most guys the entire play session seems to be totally wrapped up within an hour or so. I want it to keep going for many, many hours. Penetration is my favourite thing though, so the more they can give me, the higher the chance of them sexually exhausting me.


We have a moified sex swing where the seat's been converted so it feels like you're slouching on a chair instead of the biting straps that comes with it. The sex on that thing is so damned effortless (on her and my part) I can see it being used for hours on a stretch.
I saw your thread about it. It looks fun!


Not meaning to brag (ok, maybe a bit), but on the, "Multiple/Highly Orgasmic Women (and the men who adore us =)" social group board, since there isn't much activity, I've been using that space as my personal orgasm log/journal. You might enjoy reading some of my entries (to make a long story short... 45 times in an hour and a half, 130 times in one whole weekend)
Your wife sounds like a woman after my own heart. I also have extremely high numbers. :biggrin1:


Here's where I fall short with my skills. I'd like to get better at this, but haven't had the opportunity to practice much. (my wife doesn't do the whole BDSM thing... an ex did though)
:frown1: I would be permanently unsatisfied if I didn't get my mindfuck fix. You can learn a lot through reading :smile:


Never apologize for having preferences, much less being honest about those preferences. I was telling my wife a few minutes ago that one of the draws of this forum was not only because the women are honest about what society labels as "superficial" preferences, but are celebrated as well.
*Waves at MrsRawDog*
I struggle with having this particular preference. My preference is based on physical possibilities (and impossibilities) but it just seems way too close to choosing based on appearance, which for me has always seemed somewhat distasteful.


Ditto. Once again you've hit the nail on the head. I can identify with that wholeheartedly. Even after an orgasm, and I go soft and can't get hard again, I still want sex.
I think it makes things quite difficult. It's a brilliant way to be if you're matched with a partner who is similar, but those people are few and far between.
 

D_Barbi_Dahl

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My current Fuck buddy is the best sex I've ever had, his cock is perfect he does satisfy me, but I'm afraid I've worn him out. We used to fuck about 2x a night and in the morning 5 days a week and now...sadly... That's dropped off significantly. I'm ready for more!