Like most everything in life, the answers to your question will vary from person to person. There are entire communities and websites (like fetlife.com) devoted to the Dominant/submissive lifestyle. As someone above pointed out, there are people who choose to live the lifestyle 24/7, others who keep it strictly in the bedroom, and a wide variety in between.
I think the most important thing anyone can do when faced with the idea of D/s is to talk about it with their partner. If the bedroom play and real life are causing confusion, that's cause for concern and there's a chance someone could get hurt - emotionally, as well as physically.
I've met many people in my local kink community that tried to fight their feelings or ignored their partners' interest for too long and they all say the same thing - that if they would've addressed it sooner it would have saved them all a lot of confusion and frustration.