and well opinionated as I always have been. Number one, my son for whom I am very greatful to have. He is my love and my life and one reason to focus on how to make this a better world so he has hopefully a better life as an adult as I have. He is a true gift as I had a rough pregnancy and almost died during his delivery, as did he. My dad also died when I was 28 weeks pregnant and on bedrest. But it gave our family a focus and to look forward to the future and happiness of telling him what a great man his grandfather was and to keep traditions alive in our family! Number two, I refuse to let the man that treated me so bad for close to 10 years take away my main focus in life and my main reason for wanting to better myself and the world we live in. I simply want the best for my son but if my son chooses to want his father in his life I will respect his wishes at any age. But I am sure my son will see his fathers true colors and decide on his own the opinion he has of him and that will always be my son's right! I will remain an adult and never bad mouth my son's father in front of him as my son has a right to come to his own conclusion, and it's just a bad example. Number Three, as a former pre-hospital and hospital worker. I am completely frustrated with the BS and red tape someone has to go through in this country to get decent healthcare. So what, if I currently have public aid. I don't deserve the looks I get from people just because they think I am some kind of white trash. Fact is, I have had a very hard adult life healthwise. I try to make the best of it and am trying to focus on the positives these days. It is sometimes harder than others. Many of them don't know I started volunteering on an ambulance at 15 years old and gave 9 years and over 10,000 hours in call time and training back to my community. I started even paying into the tax system at 12 years old detasseling corn every summer! So, please don't judge me before you know some of the facts. I am not out of work because I choose to be. I am out because I am legitimately sick. I will continue to try and get medical care until I have a quality of life for myself and for my son. I am determined to make noise, write letters, and do what I can to improve the situations for people like myself and my family members who can't get insurance at a reasonable cost or are denied due to pre-existing conditions. My life since a young age has been devoted to helping others, that is how I was raised and that is how I am raising my son. My son is being raised to respect people, be tolerant and understanding, know where he came from and appreciate what his ancestors sacrificed for him to have these freedoms, to love his family and friends and not be afraid to show it, and to always give back to his community! He may only be 5, but if he goes and brightens up a strangers day who is having a hard day and makes them smile or feel better, he is giving back already. He does this regularly. Number Four, after I am better. I plan on fighting for causes I believe in and trying to make this world a better place for all to live in. There are certain topics I am passionate about and I will make my voice heard. I may be disabled, I am not dead yet! If I am able to work full time one day. I will likely return to school then go to medical school. I feel I have so much to give to others and I will never let anyone take that from me! Number Five, thank you to my true friends and those who have been supportive of me during these hard times. You never will know how much I appreciate all of you. I certainly hope one day to return the favor and please if you ever need me just to listen or you want an honest opinion just write or call me. I will always be there for my friends! Many of you are the reason, I am staying strong and becoming more determined to keep fighting! Number six, I am just grateful to be alive and have passionate feelings that drive me everyday. The more I feel like I get shit on, the more pissed off and driven I become to make life better for my family and others like us! Final thoughts: Try to learn from each day you are given, remember the good times in life, but always remember they will outshine any difficult time you have gone through. Don't forget the difficult times, do your best to learn from the situation and improve your life. Also, never give up! There will always be someone out there who really does care or want to help you. It may take some work to find that person but it is worth the effort! Live, Love, and Learn!!!!