I'm getting as tired of this stuff as some of the 100% straights.
Broadly speaking, there's a difference between core ( biological ) sexuality, and the more superficial "lifestyle" stuff. So, I'd maybe use different terms. 'Homosexual' for activities with the same sex ( males for males, females for females ) and for the tendency to do that more often than not. But 'gay' for the lifestyle choices side of it :- who you'd like to live with, places you like to go, things you'd like to do, how you dress, shop, eat, etc...
So. I think the underlying sexuality is largely down to your genes. And how you grow up, what influences you, etc. And maybe a little bit of the icing on the cake might be some aspects of who you choose to sleep with. So, I think some people are say 100% homosexual and some are 100% hetero. Some might be 50-50, but I think more are in the 70-80% zone one way or the other.
And if you are, let's say, a 70% homosexual person, you COULD choose not to act on that, and just get married, have kids, etc. A lot do. And sometimes ( not always ) they are happy enough.
But some occasionally indulge that side, with or without the understanding of their partner. That's all OK too, provided everyone is kept fully aware of what's happening and why. I don't think "supposedly straight" men or women who are actually bi, should hide that or cheat on their partners. No-one should, anyway.
So, I think it's to do with the general misunderstanding of statistics that we see on sites like this quite a lot. Some people will take a meeting with one or two straight married men who have homosexual sex with them, as evidence that all straight men are really bisexual. That's totally wrong.
But on the other side, some genuinely 100% straight men will take it as an article of faith that all other straight men are the same as them. That's just as much of an error.
So ... conclusions
- some men are very homosexual, but nothing like a majority. It's a relatively small minority whether it be 5% or 15% or 25% or whatever.
- homosexuality is about penises, and sometimes orifices. It's not about curtains and cushions and clothing. Or even leather, gym gear, etc.
- some men are bi, and can live out various lifestyles to fit in with that
- some men are totally straight in terms of what they do, let alone what they might occasionally think about
- some men are totally straight even in terms of what they think / fantasise about. Probably a fair % of straight men ... or men in general.
- it doesn't matter, really, because there are compatible partners for everyone.
- we should all just treat each other with respect, and not imply that other people are living in some kind of 'bad faith' about who they really are ...
... this last point is the one in question. Let's give it a rest ?
... and similar reasoning applies to women, though there may be some further influence on them, from their ability to give birth. That might swing the statistics, I guess. But many lesbians in relationships do have children, one way or another, so it equally well may not ...
:smile:
... but tactfulgal put it more succinctly. I hope I'm not undermining her thought, with my attempt at more comprehensive reasoning :wink: I agree with her conclusion though ...
Broadly speaking, there's a difference between core ( biological ) sexuality, and the more superficial "lifestyle" stuff. So, I'd maybe use different terms. 'Homosexual' for activities with the same sex ( males for males, females for females ) and for the tendency to do that more often than not. But 'gay' for the lifestyle choices side of it :- who you'd like to live with, places you like to go, things you'd like to do, how you dress, shop, eat, etc...
So. I think the underlying sexuality is largely down to your genes. And how you grow up, what influences you, etc. And maybe a little bit of the icing on the cake might be some aspects of who you choose to sleep with. So, I think some people are say 100% homosexual and some are 100% hetero. Some might be 50-50, but I think more are in the 70-80% zone one way or the other.
And if you are, let's say, a 70% homosexual person, you COULD choose not to act on that, and just get married, have kids, etc. A lot do. And sometimes ( not always ) they are happy enough.
But some occasionally indulge that side, with or without the understanding of their partner. That's all OK too, provided everyone is kept fully aware of what's happening and why. I don't think "supposedly straight" men or women who are actually bi, should hide that or cheat on their partners. No-one should, anyway.
So, I think it's to do with the general misunderstanding of statistics that we see on sites like this quite a lot. Some people will take a meeting with one or two straight married men who have homosexual sex with them, as evidence that all straight men are really bisexual. That's totally wrong.
But on the other side, some genuinely 100% straight men will take it as an article of faith that all other straight men are the same as them. That's just as much of an error.
So ... conclusions
- some men are very homosexual, but nothing like a majority. It's a relatively small minority whether it be 5% or 15% or 25% or whatever.
- homosexuality is about penises, and sometimes orifices. It's not about curtains and cushions and clothing. Or even leather, gym gear, etc.
- some men are bi, and can live out various lifestyles to fit in with that
- some men are totally straight in terms of what they do, let alone what they might occasionally think about
- some men are totally straight even in terms of what they think / fantasise about. Probably a fair % of straight men ... or men in general.
- it doesn't matter, really, because there are compatible partners for everyone.
- we should all just treat each other with respect, and not imply that other people are living in some kind of 'bad faith' about who they really are ...
... this last point is the one in question. Let's give it a rest ?
... and similar reasoning applies to women, though there may be some further influence on them, from their ability to give birth. That might swing the statistics, I guess. But many lesbians in relationships do have children, one way or another, so it equally well may not ...
:smile:
... but tactfulgal put it more succinctly. I hope I'm not undermining her thought, with my attempt at more comprehensive reasoning :wink: I agree with her conclusion though ...
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