Sports- The Ass Smack

YourAvgGuy

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Definitely a gesture to congratulate and say "job well done." There are different ways to acknowledge this sentiment. In sports, an ass smack has become the norm. Nothing wrong with that; nothing sexual about it.

Italian978 has made some excellent points. If I smack you on your ass while playing B-ball or some football it is just a friendly gesture to say good job... nothing more. If I wanted it to mean more trust me, I would think I would be doing more than smacking someone on the ass...
 

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You guys are looking at it all wrong. It's simple. In sports its loud, lots of people are around, so to let a guy know he did well you smack him on the ass. The reason why it's a smack on the ass is because in most sports the athletes don't wear any protective padding over the ass, so the guy can feel it when you give him a smack. In hockey you never see smacks on the ass because they wear padded shorts. If they do smack an ass, they use their sticks, but mainly they high five. You do what you can to get his attention because you want the guy to know he did well. That's the reason for it. There's nothing gay about it.
 

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Pretty ironic that one of the only things straight guys have left to show affection is something that is so gay.

It's really funny. Let two gay guys slap each other on the ass, and everyone will see it as nothing BUT sexual. Let two straight guys on the field do that, and people will deny passionately that it's sexual in any way.

Reminds me of a quote I read somewhere. A lady in the LA Times said that the behavior among men in the football locker room is so close to the behavior of gay men in their bedrooms -- that it makes them (the ball players) that much more homophobic.

It's weird. You can be straight and get away with gay behavior; or you can be gay, do the same behavior, and have to endure discrimination. Go figure. :confused:

Ass smacking is the only thing straight guys have to show each other affection anymore without looking queer. That and the other one is the quick bear hug and 3 hand pat to the back with immediate release.

Wouldn't want to look gay now would we?
 

B_henry miller

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If there's nothing to it, then why do they do it?

Let's see you or me go up to a football player and slap him on the butt to say "well done." He'd be likely to give you a fat lip. Why? Because you aren't on his team. You don't have a relationship with him.

So ... the butt slap is a part of a relationship these men have with each other; it's not just something that anyone is allowed to do. It's a privilege as a member of the club. This ass slapping is an indication of "belonging" to one another in some ways.

Some day, straight men will realize that ultimately there is very little difference between their behavior and the behavior of gay men. :rolleyes:

I agree. There's nothin in it. Just a well done.
 

B_henry miller

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But I've seen baseball players do this, and they don't wear any protection that I'm aware of. And I've seen football players smack each other on the ass in college when they are in class; no football anywhere near them.

You guys are looking at it all wrong. It's simple. In sports its loud, lots of people are around, so to let a guy know he did well you smack him on the ass. The reason why it's a smack on the ass is because in most sports the athletes don't wear any protective padding over the ass, so the guy can feel it when you give him a smack. In hockey you never see smacks on the ass because they wear padded shorts. If they do smack an ass, they use their sticks, but mainly they high five. You do what you can to get his attention because you want the guy to know he did well. That's the reason for it. There's nothing gay about it.
 

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Get it right, dammit! If you're str8, it's got to be a passing smack to the ass,..and there are other rules.

If you are slapping the bare ass of a guy as he shaves or dresses, you must assault him as you are moving through his space--coming or leaving. You can also smack his bare ass as he moves through your space; passing your locker or parting ways with you, as you are shaving at a sink. You can even slap a guy on the butt, as you walk up to a nearby sink to shave. What's important here is that, once the smack has been delivered, one of the straight guys MUST always be in motion.

Straight guy don't ever smack a guy's bare butt, smile and hang around,..and he don't :wink: wink, either. You also don't bend over and solicit a hard smack on your bare ass, like "Yeah, Big Daddy! Slap that ass! That's right!".

Don't ever smack another guy's bare ass, then force his butt-crack onto your crotch. Looks a little gay, I think.

Don't ever smack and squeeze or tweak.

It must also be a hard enough :eek: slap to get the subject's immediate attention. If he's a white, the smack should flush his bum a dull, :redface: rosy color--bright red, if he's :biggrin1: Irish.
 

str82fcuk

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henry miller is completely correct except for the fact that that this sort of gay behaviour has to be done very rapidly, while in motion, and strictly without any indication of enjoyment, in order to make it appear straight enough for people to fool themselves into thinking that there is really nothing gay about it ...
 

fratpack

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When I played sports in high school and college, it was always meant as congratulations, job well done sort of thing. Hmmm, maybe that's why I did so well, because I just loved it! LOL.
 

B_henry miller

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Interesting algorithm. But it still fails to address the question of Why would self-described heterosexual men even WANT to slap another guy on the ass?

The only real explanation I can come up with is that you guys want to slap each other on the ass because it is pleasurable for you; which is the same fuckin' reason that gay men want to touch each other -- because it's pleasurable for them. All any of these "rules" are intended as is a deflection from the fact that it is pleasurable for these self-identified straight men.

I think the only difference between "gay" men and "straight" men is that straight men play by the rules, and gay men don't. Straight men express their love for one another in these incredibly cumbersome contexts, and gay men sort of just cut to the chase.

"What else can I say? Everyone is gay." ~ Kurt Cobain

Get it right, dammit! If you're str8, it's got to be a passing smack to the ass,..and there are other rules.

If you are slapping the bare ass of a guy as he shaves or dresses, you must assault him as you are moving through his space--coming or leaving. You can also smack his bare ass as he moves through your space; passing your locker or parting ways with you, as you are shaving at a sink. You can even slap a guy on the butt, as you walk up to a nearby sink to shave. What's important here is that, once the smack has been delivered, one of the straight guys MUST always be in motion.

Straight guy don't ever smack a guy's bare butt, smile and hang around,..and he don't :wink: wink, either. You also don't bend over and solicit a hard smack on your bare ass, like "Yeah, Big Daddy! Slap that ass! That's right!".

Don't ever smack another guy's bare ass, then force his butt-crack onto your crotch. Looks a little gay, I think.

Don't ever smack and squeeze or tweak.

It must also be a hard enough :eek: slap to get the subject's immediate attention. If he's a white, the smack should flush his bum a dull, :redface: rosy color--bright red, if he's :biggrin1: Irish.
 

B_henry miller

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Exactly. I hadn't even read this response of yours yet, and I had fired off my response: that all these rules are about is an attempt to mask the inherent homosexuality in it. Accept it, guys. We're all just a bunch of queers. ;)

About the "rule" that the ass slapping must take place while in motion, that's very interesting. That hadn't occurred to me. But it's interesting to note that throughout art history there have been incidences where nude depictions of the male form were not allowed unless the nude male figure was in motion. In other words, feminine beauty can be appreciated within an aesthetic context (just for the look of it); but male beauty can only be appreciated within an athletic context, that is, for what it does.

henry miller is completely correct except for the fact that that this sort of gay behaviour has to be done very rapidly, while in motion, and strictly without any indication of enjoyment, in order to make it appear straight enough for people to fool themselves into thinking that there is really nothing gay about it ...
 

str82fcuk

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I think the only difference between "gay" men and "straight" men is that straight men play by the rules, and gay men don't. Straight men express their love for one another in these incredibly cumbersome contexts, and gay men sort of just cut to the chase.

I think you've hit the nail on the head. I had this incredibly eye-opening moment a few years ago when I shared a six hour car ride with a straight couple who didnt know I was gay and while speaking to his gf he referred to gays as 'those bastards' in a resentful tone, like he was really annoyed that we dont play by the rules and dont find it necessary to go through all of that elaborate hetero stuff just in order to keep face and feel accepted as part of the team whatever because we dont care if we're part of the big old straight team what bastards we are lol anyway basically I think this is all an evolutionary technique to keep guys directed at women when its so much simpler to go with other guys and this evolutionary policy (which has been observed in other species) is now breaking down due to overpopulation et al so now its ok for you, if i like the look of you, to do what comes naturally without pretending its just part of team-spirit
 

B_henry miller

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The other thing is that ultimately society, at least as it is currently constructed, does not want men to be peaceful and love each other. This society, and I suppose all (to some degree), want men to be warriors. They want men to be conditioned to fight other men. This is all sports is about; men being conditioned to fight other men. This is the first step toward having men join the military and being turned in to killing machines who are dropped in other countries (Iraq, etc.) to kill other men. Spectator sports is just a degree away from the military, a degree away from the battle field in a war. The same terms are often used in military and sports. In my area, when the two biggest college football teams face off, they call it "Civil War."

Men aren't supposed to love each other. They're supposed to kill each other. So, you have two choices: 1. Rebel, like gay men. 2. Disguise your need for love from other men, such as with these in-motion ass slappings that are NOT to be followed by a wink. ;)
 

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It must also be a hard enough :eek: slap to get the subject's immediate attention. If he's a white, the smack should flush his bum a dull, :redface: rosy color--bright red

That's the only type of smack I ever recieve in sports or locker rooms. However, in wrestling, we smack ass even if the other dude is not in motion. Coach would always do it to emphasize a point or statement or directions on attack/strategy.
Funny- We would ass smack and bang chests in public/in front of the crowd. We'd hold each other, cry, hug, listen, talk, fight, yell, laugh, grab and be silly in the lockers/showers. I grew up knowing to hold it in until we were alone, nomatter if it was a celebrational feeling or sadness at losing.
Jake
PS I never thought of locker rooms/showers as ultrahomoerotic. But looking back at all of it, I now see what some people mean.
 

B_henry miller

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I never wrestled until recently. Only as an observer did I witness it. By observation, I thought it was extremely homoerotic.

Well, I recently attended a wrestling class. Sorry, guys, but GOOD GOD it is the most blisteringly homoerotic thing on the face of the planet. It's about as close to having sex with another man as you can come without actually having sex. It was palpable how these straight guys could not WAIT to get their hands on each others' bodies.

Again, this is why jocks and athletes are so homophobic -- because they have to work very, very hard to suppress their awareness of the fact that they are extremely homoerotic.
 

B_henry miller

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I read that in ancient Greece warriors were encouraged to become lovers with one another because this meant that in battle they would fight even harder to defend one another. I wonder if this is at all similar to guys on sports teams slapping each others' asses, hugging each other, even kissing each other. Doing everything that in any other context would be defined as "gay."
 

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Actually some coach from my old high school just recently, patted some kid on the ass and the homophobic kid turned around an hit the coach. a lawsuit insued.