Stage fright at the urinals
- Thread starter D_Harry_Bunz
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Somebody i know called it "bashful bladder". It can be a big pain in the ass. My roomy has the problem if i walk into the bathroom when he is trying to start peeing. I just turn the water on and that seems to help him. I just have to plain sit down if i am in a public place.I remember when i was about 17 and at a concert, i went into a very busy restroom and this beautiful guy was obviously buzzed and having a good time just pulled it out and peed in the garbage can, hung like a horse and did'nt have a care in the world. I tell you the things you remember....
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There are varying degrees of a shy bladder. Some guys just can't use urinals if there are people around, others can, but there have to be dividers. Sometimes if it's a familiar place it's fine--like the work restroom. Usually its bothersome if the guy can't go unless the restroom is empty, or and "individual" one, that locks, it's not that big of a deal.
Penis size doesn't have anything to do with it. Guys can be small average or large. It's usually about getting over the perception that people are watching or would be wondering if you are peeing or not.
This gets in the way the most if the guy is exposed to situations where it's inconvenient, like football games, bars, or situations where multiple guys have to go at once and it's hard for the guy to go. Anyone that has this can google it, and look at online sites. A lot of sites say you need to break the problem with having a "pee buddy" where you go to a whole bunch of places and pee with someone else who doesn't have the issue. You start out by peeing alone in the bathroom, and work your way up to the "trough" bathroom. I think that's a great way to break the cycle of going to a urinal and not being able to take a piss, but you have to talk to a buddy about the issue, and then set aside a fair amount of time to go through the motions of peeing together in public. Websites on the subject can give some step by step things to try yourself.
Penis size doesn't have anything to do with it. Guys can be small average or large. It's usually about getting over the perception that people are watching or would be wondering if you are peeing or not.
This gets in the way the most if the guy is exposed to situations where it's inconvenient, like football games, bars, or situations where multiple guys have to go at once and it's hard for the guy to go. Anyone that has this can google it, and look at online sites. A lot of sites say you need to break the problem with having a "pee buddy" where you go to a whole bunch of places and pee with someone else who doesn't have the issue. You start out by peeing alone in the bathroom, and work your way up to the "trough" bathroom. I think that's a great way to break the cycle of going to a urinal and not being able to take a piss, but you have to talk to a buddy about the issue, and then set aside a fair amount of time to go through the motions of peeing together in public. Websites on the subject can give some step by step things to try yourself.
D_Miranda_Wrights
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I have this periodically and I'm the opposite of shy. I think it's kind of a product of overthinking. Like, I think about how I'm not going fast enough, and it makes it harder to. I have the same thing with sleeping. My mind races and the rest of me kinda freezes.
JacquesValue
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Pissing operates on the same vibrational frequency as emotional expression. When and where you can't speak your mind, you'll have a hard time pissing.
People piss all over the place in broad daylight at Burning Man. It's a place full of self expression.
Women are repressed by society, and have the hardest time peeing in public.
Try this: burst into a busy restroom and shout out something like "my mom's a big old bitch". Then see if it's easier to piss.
People piss all over the place in broad daylight at Burning Man. It's a place full of self expression.
Women are repressed by society, and have the hardest time peeing in public.
Try this: burst into a busy restroom and shout out something like "my mom's a big old bitch". Then see if it's easier to piss.
Hopefully all men with male kids will expose them to urinal peeing as natural. I wish mine had.
I have had this problem since I was in the 4th. grade. It has gotten better over the years, but is not totally gone. At times I am fine now, but at other times I couldn't pee if you held a gun to my head. I have more trouble around people I know. I can pee beside a stranger, but I don't think that I could pee beside one of my buddies. I can shower beside or go in a steam room with them, but just not pee. Why should taking a piss be this much pressure?
SR_Pepe Le Pube
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dude, sometimes i lean back and let the dudes watch me take a leak. any chance to show off
I once asked my wife if any women she knows are pee shy or have bashful bladders (paruresis). She said there were two women who are. When they go into the stall to pee and a woman in the next stall hasn't started to pee, they wait each other out. Very often one or the other never can pee at all and leaves the stall with a very full bladder. Some women can't pee in their own home if they think anyone can hear their pee going into the toilet. One said that she went with her husband to his sister's home. They drove for 5 hours. She was bursting to go. They only had one bathroom next to the living room. She went in there bursting and couldn't piss a drop. She had to wait until they went to bed until she could urinate. It took her 15 minutes to drip a little and then she pissed for 3 minutes straight. For help: www.paruresis.org
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- dirk,
i think a lot of it has to do with overthinking as i had this problem as a kid and young teen. i was never worried about people seeing my dick at all, it was more that i was afraid of people being conscious of the fact that i could not piss or was not pissing. so it was almost like a paradox, i couldn't pee because i could almost imagine those behind me (who i could not see) knowing that i was having difficulty.
i got over it by, and this sounds hilarious but its true, imagining a crowd of strangers cheering me on as opposed to my previous paranoid thought about them all being conscious of me taking too long. the imagined encouragement really helped and i got over it and don't even think about it anymore.
i think its just the more you think about it, the worse it is. just do anything to take your mind away from focusing on the fact that you cannot piss.
mind you, not everyone seems to have this problem. on two seperate occasions at a strip club i've experienced men quite visibly masturbating into the urinal... and i'm not a frequent customer to strip clubs at all. both of the men in question were asian business-looking types, strangely enough.
i got over it by, and this sounds hilarious but its true, imagining a crowd of strangers cheering me on as opposed to my previous paranoid thought about them all being conscious of me taking too long. the imagined encouragement really helped and i got over it and don't even think about it anymore.
i think its just the more you think about it, the worse it is. just do anything to take your mind away from focusing on the fact that you cannot piss.
mind you, not everyone seems to have this problem. on two seperate occasions at a strip club i've experienced men quite visibly masturbating into the urinal... and i'm not a frequent customer to strip clubs at all. both of the men in question were asian business-looking types, strangely enough.
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when i go to my friends home they (both male) will leave the bathroom door open just outside of the living room and both will stand and take a long piss- which echoes thru the room. I've gotten used to it- but at first I will say I was a bit intimidated. I have told them that I always sit when I am not at my own home- because I don't want to spray all over their floor...
Sometimes I can go with no problem. Sometimes, I choke. Sometimes, I keep telling myself over and over again, "You can do it. Yours is way bigger than theirs.". Sometimes, it works. 
I enjoy letting guys see me piss...they usually appreciate the view too...making sure it's not too blatant, of course.
But I still get pee shy, which is to say that the stream dries up for no reason as soon as I get to the urinal. So THAT is embarassing, not the showing. I have to wait until I really HAVE TO go, before I use a public john.
But I still get pee shy, which is to say that the stream dries up for no reason as soon as I get to the urinal. So THAT is embarassing, not the showing. I have to wait until I really HAVE TO go, before I use a public john.
There is a man I know well who spent a great deal of time doing gay porn in front of a camera. This man now retired and wanting to keep it that way was well known back in the 1970's and 1980's in that field.
What is absolutely hilarious however is that while he could perform every sex act that you could (and a few you couldn't) imagine in front of a camera, he could not start a stream of urine at a urinal if other people were near him.
Pee shy is common and the cause is not really known other than something taking place in childhood.
This is no different than the shyness of people in communal showers or restrooms as found on some military bases a few generations back.
It is surprisingly common. . . .
- sdbg,
My piss stream splits and makes a mess when I stand at a toilet unless I'm extremely careful. I've peed sitting down most of my life for that reason. From all the years of sitting to pee, I became self-conscious of the noise that my pee made when I stand at a toilet and pee into the water. However, some of my guy friends do exactly as you post below:
I know exactly how you feel. I was jealous of them for the lack of inhibition and for being able to pee so casually. Then I go into their bathrooms, shut the door, and they don't hear a sound. That made me feel even more inadequate. A few years ago, I decided to retrain myself to pee standing up. After a few months, I had become sufficiently accustomed to standing to take a piss that I started doing it when hanging out with my guy friends, both at their home and mine, but with the door closed. Being that the bathroom is right next to the living room, I knew that they could hear me. That was an accomplishment in itself. These guys never close the door to pee. We never talk about it. About a year ago, I started to leave the door cracked and had no trouble peeing. I progressed to the point where I could leave the door completely open and even continue a conversation while emptying my bladder. I believe that it's conditioning as I have no problem with nudity or people seeing my dick.
Oddly enough, I've never had issues with being pee shy when outdoors - only in bathrooms. I'm glad that I've overcome 95% of the pee shy thing.
This probably is worth repeating : it is something that you can get over. I was completely piss shy in my late teen years, and gradually managed to be able to piss anywhere with anyone beside me, just by training myself : initially not to look, to close my eyes until the stream started flowing. Haven't had any trouble since my mid twenties.
