Start of Relationship

[D_Petherick_Poundlouder]

Are you married to Mick Jagger?

 

[double_digit]

I didn't say all that. Just never had a real relationship, so I'm trying to see what it's all about.

It means you will have to buy a second nun-chuck and share all of your Wii discs. ;D

 

[petite]

My last relationship started 12 years ago, and it's still going on even stronger. But it didn't start like any relationship I ever had before. I think my first one was a means to an end - I wanted desperately to be a mommy and it worked. But the relationship didn't. Not a good plan for a relationship.

After years of terminal relationships I wasn't in the mood for any more. I had a shopping list that just couldn't be filled. Nobody had all the ingredients. So I tossed the list and resigned myself to be single forever.

Well, boom. My best friend invited me to hear this band, and I really wasn't in the mood to go out but I did. He wasn't the lead singer, he wasn't the loudest player, he was cool as a cucumber and looked like nothing on my shopping list. But I was terribly in lust with him. To this day I cannot explain why I reacted that way, but I seriously wanted to get to know him better. I told myself he probably has more young groupies and would never bother with a single mom. Our eyes connected somehow and I felt like he was watching me the whole time. Seems he was. He finally came directly up to me and said a gentle hello. He was smelly and sweaty and a complete turn off - ordinarily. But I would have jumped his bones if he gave me the slightest signal. He didn't. I think if he had we probably would have ruined anything.

Like I said, I've never had a relationship start that way before, but this one is forever. Oh, it's a roller coaster, all right. Lots of highs and lows, and I mean high highs and low lows. But we hang on and sometimes we throw our arms up high and ride it like crazy. He gets me more angry than any other man I ever knew. But he also makes me happier than anyone in the universe can.

A relationship isn't happily ever after. You sail on that happiness over the rough drops, but you have to know how to do it. Otherwise you'll fall like a rock and won't have the strength to get up. It helps if you have someone to rely on to always lend a hand with the sailing.

That was beautiful! Thank you for posting that. I loved reading it. :smile:

 

[Corius]

I have been coming back to this thread and note that there is still confusion.

Ideally, everyone should appreciate that the term relationship has a lot of meanings.

Think of it: Life is relationship. We could not exist without connection to other persons. And, we would all be better off if we had thought more about relationships when they were not yet connected with sex for us.

Remember the line from the song: "People who need people are the luckiest people in the world.?" Those needy people are really all of us. Thousands of generations has learned by doing: a person reaches out in friendship to another; and, very often that move is met by a reciprocal move from the other. Soon they are bonding as friends and in the vast majority of friendships there is no sexual connection at all.

The nice thing about friendships and relationships is that they can be started in many venues. One of the members suggested that the OP was much to young to worry about relationships. Sorry, IMHO, that is about as wrong as you can get. Every elementary school child these days is observed for how well he/she relates to other persons and that observation is shared with the parents.

Not all relationships are positive. Some seek to dominate others while others are willingly submissive to others. When we observe that we ought to be talking about the demands of love. To love someone ought to mean a settled disposition to seek the good of that other person for his/her own sake rather than one's own. And when two persons deal with each other from such settled dispositions both are enriched.

May I add? When two persons relate to each other that way, the bond may be so strong that sex happens and that sex IMHO is the best and most fantastic because it confirms the bond of friendship and love that already exists. A friendly relationship has turned into a sexual relationship. That's the way it has happened for thousands of years.

Some persons are not as alert to the good that comes into life as they should be. Children who are taught to recognize opportunities that come into their lives are likely to be more successful generally than those who don't recognize these boons. Often the boon is a person; it could be a chance meeting or a meeting that happens simply because one person finds in another person something worthy of attention.

Become an observer of persons who have wonderful relationships; they come in all varieties. And, it helps to consider the relatonships (non-sexual as well as the sexual) that have made your life richer. Along the way you will become aware that you are in awe of the wonderful mystery of it all.