State of confusion: virginity

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by fak_et, Jul 2, 2007.

  1. fak_et

    fak_et New Member

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    I know im not the only one in this boat, it kind of sucks, i am confused because I want to get in on the whole sex game but it just isn't happenin.

    Basically, im 19 still haven't banged a chick yet.

    I guess growing up, very strict parenting, pretty much enforced that is was unacceptable, bad, etc. till marriage. My mom was born in another country and those were the values she had and my dad was just pretty passive on the issue. So i kind of stuck to that. Basically abstinance only education.

    Anyways with that, I was reluctant to do any relationships and even avoided them all together even in highschool.

    So then i went to college and got to live away from the family and it was a great experience for me, got to see stuff outside the box and from a new perspective. This is just one of the many topics i learned an entirely new perspective on.

    The problem for me is not picking up chicks, i am naturally good at that, nor is it going on dates, good at that too. It is the whole sex part, I don't know how to initiate it.

    Now this is the thing that is killing me. Since i waited this long, don't want to just start off on anyone. Some girls are very experienced, don't know how that will work out, cuz i obviously have stuff to learn. Some girls are in the same boat as me, and are somewhat reluctant as well.

    Im sure once i break the barrier i will be a natural at it, no doubt.

    Throw in some advice if you got some, im def ready to goto the next step.

    (On a sidenote, i have been working my game like crazy this summer and i got quite a few ladies i could probably bang quite easily.)
     
  2. crescendo69

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    Well, I know a forty-year old guy who has just started some heavy petting and oral stuff with women (chicks?). He is still afraid to cum at all, lest his date stuffs the sperm up her vagina to get pregnant.

    But don't feel rushed into sex. Waiting for quality has its rewards.
     
  3. HazelGod

    Gold Member

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    Your odds will probably improve when you stop using phrases like that one.
     
  4. MattBrick

    MattBrick Member

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    There is nothing wrong with waiting

    On the other hand you're old enough to get married now
    Do you want to? Do you want to have to? Do you want to get tangled up in a monagamous relationship - possibly never meet anybody ever again?
    Haha, it happened to me. I was in a similar situation as you, only I was maybe a year or too older. Let me tell you, no experience - to a situation like that, is not where you want to be.
    Be careful, because when you start having sex, your feelings can get involved.

    The idea that you have to totally stay away from girls - or be having sex all the time is a false dichotomy. You can date freely, get to know a lot of people. You can tell girls, that as far as having sex, that is not how you operate, because of the way you were raised. That you are loking to get to know some girls, and see what you like at this stage in your life. Then when you find the right one, you'll know.

    As far as sexual contact, you can set boundries. If you don't want to have actual sex, you don't have to. And you can stick to that. Honestly, the first time you stick the big guy in is not a big deal for a lot of us. For me, it was probably the most anticlimactic moment of my life actually.
    You don't magically become a man or something once you do it.
    You don't magically become part of the crowd either. Trust me
    Good Luck
     
  5. D_Egloshayle Churchkey

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    LOL, I'm 20 years old and still a virgin, so my condition is much worse!
     
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