Straight Guy Crush

Digiporn

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has anyone ever dealt with it? Meaning have you developed strong feelings for a straight guy and now you got over it?
 

Brodie888

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Usually straight crushes happen because people have no better options to get their need for emotional intimacy met.

It's usually not just sex that will fix things. Sex alone is a bit like chewing gum. It's similar to eating but doesn't give you the sustenance you are looking for.

So the cure is making more gay friends. Hopefully a few of those will become lifelong friendships. With a bit of luck, some of those friends will be much more.
 

Enthralled

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I've been in love with my best friend and have also been his "oral provider" for some time while he was between girlfriends and desperate (and I was in the closet).
I was "over-idealizing" him. His masculinity, his sexual power, that thick tree trunk between his legs I thought was the absolute perfection...
When he told me it was over I was devastated. In my mind my sex life was over. I thought I would never set my eyes on a cock that would arouse me in the same way. I was jealous. I hated the girl who was now cumming on that dick I took care of a hundred time without asking for anything in return.

Well. It was all bullshit. I hated that I couldn't kiss him anywhere but on his dick. I hated the fact that I was not allowed expose or touch myself and had to go home and masturbate to his pictures afterward. I hated that he wasn't turned on by my butt. I hated when he was making me wear fucking lipstick an teased me about it. He purposely made me felt vulnerable and inferior to him and at some point I just wanted him to hold me and confort me. Show some appreciation, tell me that what I'm doing is good and he needs me. Of course it never happened. "haha good girl" doesn't count.

He's not an asshole. He laid out his condition and I accepted it. He did not owe me a thing. I'm the one at fault for going head first in that toxic sexual relationship. I don't regret it because it was a great adventure of self-discovery, but the experience as a whole has been unfullfiling and was messing with my head in a super masochistic way. And that's probably the best you'll get from a straight guy.

Finding a man who cares. Thats how I got over it.
 

RobertHunter30

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The story of my life! It took a long time for me to figure out that there was no way a straight guy was ever going to turn gay and love me the way I loved him. It was a brutal lesson to learn. I lost one VERY good friend over this too. It was losing him that made me come to an understanding that I had to be ok with just being good friends and never anything more.
 

Digiporn

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The story of my life! It took a long time for me to figure out that there was no way a straight guy was ever going to turn gay and love me the way I loved him. It was a brutal lesson to learn. I lost one VERY good friend over this too. It was losing him that made me come to an understanding that I had to be ok with just being good friends and never anything more.
Going through it now :/
 
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RobertHunter30

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Going through it now :/
I am really sorry to hear that - it is very difficult and even confusing especially depending on the vibes that friend is giving - hang in there - it will get better
 

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The story of my life! It took a long time for me to figure out that there was no way a straight guy was ever going to turn gay and love me the way I loved him. It was a brutal lesson to learn. I lost one VERY good friend over this too. It was losing him that made me come to an understanding that I had to be ok with just being good friends and never anything more.

THIS. this was pretty much my experience of falling completely for a straight guy in my early 20s.

there's an odd disconnect between some gay guys knowing that they're born gay and that being gay isn't a choice no matter what bible-thumping fuckwits say, but simultaneously thinking they can convert straight guys if they just try hard enough. it doesn't happen. you are who you are, he is who he is. confessing all and attempting to cop a misjudged feel will no more make him abandon a lifetime of chasing pussy than the misplaced affections of a loving woman will make you give up cock. unrequited love is SHIT, but there we are. there are people you just can't have, whether you're gay or straight or whatever, people who will never feel for you what you feel for them, and you have to learn to deal with it and move on with your life.
 

Digiporn

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THIS. this was pretty much my experience of falling completely for a straight guy in my early 20s.

there's an odd disconnect between some gay guys knowing that they're born gay and that being gay isn't a choice no matter what bible-thumping fuckwits say, but simultaneously thinking they can convert straight guys if they just try hard enough. it doesn't happen. you are who you are, he is who he is. confessing all and attempting to cop a misjudged feel will no more make him abandon a lifetime of chasing pussy than the misplaced affections of a loving woman will make you give up cock. unrequited love is SHIT, but there we are. there are people you just can't have, whether you're gay or straight or whatever, people who will never feel for you what you feel for them, and you have to learn to deal with it and move on with your life.

Yes, I feel the same way. Meh!
 

tangas

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I had crushes with straight guys when I was younger then at 20 I realized that I must be gay or bi at least. Never made a move on my friends but I surely thought about it especially at sleep overs and drunk seeing them in their underwear. Underwear really turns me on go figure.
 
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deleted3321641

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I have a friend.
He is in my school i always saw how he look at me and i looked at him sometimes too. Then however we talked because of a friend of mine and his. He added me on snapchat and we talked two weeks long every day. And i really thought he liked me. Than i went to school and my best girl(friend) told me that she liked him and she confessed to him but he didn't want her so however we there got in contact and we groupchatted everyday for hours so we were really close friends. After some time we meet after school and i saw how she was really touchy with him and he was the same way. They got together and they are for 7 months together now they broke up. And he writes to me again sometimes with red hearts... i don't know how to feel i know i like him a lot but i don't know how he feels about me. I thought he liked me but he got together with my best girlfriend. We still write and in school he always comes to me. I told about this to my best friend and she told me thats he is playing with me but i don't know... what do you guys think. Does he like me or isn't he sure about his sexuality :[
 

Digiporn

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Well this is still happening.... almost a year later

I ended up telling him during a drunken night out that I had a crush on him, he didn’t seem bothered by it. I on the other hand was super embarrassed about it and couldn’t speak to him for like a week.

long story short: I felt so embarrassed I did the most infantile thing and unfollowed him on ig (for my own sake). He in returned unliked my photos WTF?

There’s obviously other things he’s done, comments made and instances that have happened that make me question him and my own sanity to be completely honest...
 

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While a crush happens, I don't think of them as healthy. The one with the crush assumes the other party to have some sort of magical powers. The only power the other party has is the one over the other's emotions.

The crushee (sorry, I am doing this quickly) may not be aware of the crush, or, be somewhat put off by it.

It is best for the one with the crush to get out and meet even more people, so that he or she meets the "one", who can also reciprocate the feelings.
 

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I did and one night we actually had sex. The next day, he said he was always curious and could trust me. Not sure if he was gay/bi but he ended up going back to women. I think about him all the time. He game the that upside down spider man kiss before the movies did. It was the hottest sex I ever had but we were both drunk and high, so I don't know.
 
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