Strong minded women turn me on.

bluekarma

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Lord, I'm going to flip this topic a little and say - Men who appreciate strong minded women turn me on....

I was with a man for 10 years who constatnly fought my 'free spirit' and desire to gain knowledge and learn. He felt it was an insult to his ego, and hated that I wanted to think for myself and was capable of such. I will never make that mistake again. A man who not only appreciates, but gets off on my strong will is very appealing to me. In fact several men I met here (and others IRL) proved to me that not all men want a dumb submissive woman to boost their ego. I thought for a long time that in order to be a good wife, or SO this is the way I should behave....never so thankful to have been enlightened in all of my life.

I can truly be myself now....*sigh* while it has been a long bumpy ride, now that I'm "here" having been "there", only makes me appreciate it that much more. I have a screen name on another board that sums up this new phase in my life - Free2Bme.....pretty much says it all, right?
 

faceking

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Anyone else get really horny when the ladies are forthright and intelligent.

It gives me the horn so.

Do you think I have a little sub side coming through or is it just admiration for a peer.

Can be both. I do too. I work with a handful of ladies in relatively powerful positions, worth oodles of $$$...AND a few are very attractive. So may it's some submissive/dominant thing...to be able to just make them lose it in bed.:redface:
 

Blocko

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Give me a smart strong woman who loves a bit of mental sparring before a hungry torrid tryst of heightened awareness and tension that unleashes itself in a explosive series of flash-bulb moments that will be imprinted in my mind long after we pant in each other's arms.
 

naughty

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Give me a smart strong woman who loves a bit of mental sparring before a hungry torrid tryst of heightened awareness and tension that unleashes itself in a explosive series of flash-bulb moments that will be imprinted in my mind long after we pant in each other's arms.

Wow!

You wore me out just reading that description...:biggrin1:
 

ClaireTalon

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Anyone else get really horny when the ladies are forthright and intelligent.

It gives me the horn so.

Do you think I have a little sub side coming through or is it just admiration for a peer.

Thank you for this compliment, finally someone who screams it out loud in an own thread, and not in just a mere post.

I don't think it's your sub side, admiration for a peer quite meets it, from my experience. Admit it, you just like some intellectual sparrings as fore-foreplay, and find it sexy when your partner doesn't just submit into anything you come up with, in bed or else.

Being forthright turns off some men, I have made that bad experience. Some act like the prima donna if they get in contact with your outspokeness, others shift into a defensive mode that kills any sexual tension that could arise from a little fight, and others ignore it completely. I take it you are none of these kinds, right? Remember, there's only one correct answer you can give now :biggrin1:
 

fluoro

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The best relationships I've had in my life were with intelligent, independent, strong-willed women. Not only is life more fun and interesting with smart women, but sex is better as well. I've never had great sex with submissive-type women - just not as interesting. I haven't had many partners over the years, but I think this is one of the great distinctions between good relationships and forgettable ones (for me anyway).
 

Belly_Dancer

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Here I go again :rolleyes:, but I don't want to kill this interesting thread. If anyone doesn't feel like reading my mega-post, please just skip it and move on...I won't be offended. :wink:

In Non-Sexual Situations:

I am a very strong woman -- a natural leader. I am intelligent and am by no means afraid to speak my mind. I do this with my partner as well, and he appreciates it. He never has to wonder what I think or feel about something -- if I have an opinion (positive or negative) I will not hesitate to voice it.

I am very stubborn (sometimes to a fault -- can I blame it on being a Taurus?) and I will fight for what I think is right, at work, with friends and loved ones, or with my Significant Other (who is also a Taurus...hmmm)

In Sexual Situations:

As I've said before, I am a lifelong sexual submissive, and I've discovered I'm far more masochistic than I originally believed. I don't think these things are anything to be ashamed of. My submissive nature does not mean that I am passive in bed like some kind of rag doll. Rather, it means that I give the gift of control (over my very strong will and equally strong body) to my lover, and the resulting experiences are deeply satisfying (sexually and emotionally) for both of us.

Submitting means nothing if there is nothing to submit. Artfulwilly knows he is taking control of a very strong woman, and that she willingly does his bidding.

No matter what situation we are in, if he snaps his fingers, I have 30 seconds to be sucking his cock. Many women would be outraged, but I am deeply fulfilled by being dominated in this way.

My entire body belongs to him, to be used for his pleasure as he sees fit, when he likes, and how he likes. If I happen to get off while he's taking his pleasure, so be it. If he happens to feel like making me get off, so be it. But I don't give orders in bed. I take them.

That said, I don't think anyone will ever beat the sass out of me. I don't expect most people to understand the "high" I get from being physically punished with his hand, implements of torture, or his cock (which is a force to reckon with), but I enter a zone where every sensation is magnified and I am set free from my need to control.

(And I apologize if this behavior offends anyone. It isn't meant to. I would never want to be physically abused in the classical sense...what AW & I do is completely consensual.)

Anyway, a few days ago he said something I didn't like during a scene, and without thinking, I responded "I wasn't giving an order, I was just making a comment, ASSHOLE!"

It takes nerve to call someone an asshole when you are the one restrained on your hands and knees with your ass in the air, and he is the one holding the flogger. :biggrin1:

So, I was severely punished for my impertinence (which I enjoyed). But later, he told me he loves my occasional outbursts, in spite of his need to dominate.

At this time I think he has about...25 long furrows where I drew blood on his back and shoulders with my nails. I don't do anything half-assed, and if AW orders me to scratch him, he knows he will get hurt.

But the next day, like the caring and considerate man he is outside the bedroom, he washed my sheets while I was at work, removing all traces of the bloodstains his scratches had left while he was sleeping. (He also made breakfast, packed my lunch, did the dishes, cleaned the apartment, all while plotting exactly how he was going to abuse me when I got home).

Artful has fucked me so hard and for so long that his knees have been worn raw and bleeding. And I have reveled in his possession like nothing I've ever experienced sexually before.

Does this make me a "dumb submissive?"

I think not.
 

Lordpendragon

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I didn't intend this to be an LPSG ladies appreciation thread - but if it is, so be it, you merit it. I wish you all every possible happiness, you have been, you are, so much to me. Thank you.
 

DC_DEEP

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HollyBlue, anyone who already understands this kind of submission doesn't need your explanation. Those who don't already understand it, I doubt they ever will.

(I'm sending a PM for the rest of this message...)
 

fluoro

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Does this make me a "dumb submissive?"

I think not.

You sound like an intelligent, independent, strong-willed woman.
It seems you also know what you want sexually - I get the sense from your post that you and your significant other have a reciprocal, mutually beneficial relationship.

In contrast, I have a friend who has to have dinner on the table when her "husband" gets home or he's pissed. She puts up with so much misogynistic crap on a daily basis that it just disturbs me. I think it's her lack of self confidence that keeps her in this rut of a relationship. Recently they went for over a year and a half without sex, but she hung in there and eventually they had sex again. She's submissive on a completely different level but certainly not independent or strong-willed. I don't understand either one of them - why he would treat her like this, or why she puts up with it. They both lead a basically unhappy existence, but neither makes a move to change it. Life's too short for that crap.

I could call my friend a "dumb submissive", but not you, HollyBlue.
 

Belly_Dancer

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You sound like an intelligent, independent, strong-willed woman.
It seems you also know what you want sexually - I get the sense from your post that you and your significant other have a reciprocal, mutually beneficial relationship.

In contrast, I have a friend who has to have dinner on the table when her "husband" gets home or he's pissed. She puts up with so much misogynistic crap on a daily basis that it just disturbs me. I think it's her lack of self confidence that keeps her in this rut of a relationship. Recently they went for over a year and a half without sex, but she hung in there and eventually they had sex again. She's submissive on a completely different level but certainly not independent or strong-willed. I don't understand either one of them - why he would treat her like this, or why she puts up with it. They both lead a basically unhappy existence, but neither makes a move to change it. Life's too short for that crap.

I could call my friend a "dumb submissive", but not you, HollyBlue.

I agree. The situation you describe is heartbreaking, although maybe I would use the word "senseless" more so than dumb. I've seen some very "intelligent" women who have no common sense when it comes to their personal lives.

And I might use the word "doormat" rather than submissive.

I hope she is able to gain some self-esteem, somehow, and find her way to a happier life.
 

Big Dreamer

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Are there children involved, Fluoro? I've known women that were afraid to distance themselves from domineering assholes because they feared that the end result is that they would be saddled with all the responsibility of rasing the kids after the asshole got the boot. Ironically, in the specific case I'm referring to, the woman in question was the only one involved in the kids lives anyway.
 

DC_DEEP

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You are correct, Fluoro. There's a big difference between voluntarily assuming any given role because it has a complementary function in your life (as in the case of Holly) and assuming any given role because you feel that you have no choice, or you believe "that's the way things are supposed to be" or "I'm scared to try to change my situation."

I still say that a man who treats his partner as you describe above is simply overcompensating for his feelings of being weak and inadequate.
 

fluoro

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Are there children involved, Fluoro? I've known women that were afraid to distance themselves from domineering assholes because they feared that the end result is that they would be saddled with all the responsibility of rasing the kids after the asshole got the boot. Ironically, in the specific case I'm referring to, the woman in question was the only one involved in the kids lives anyway.

No, the kid is grown now and out of the house - and it was his kid from a previous marriage. They aren't legally married and the house is his - he has all the power in the relationship - she would have to find other living arrangements. There has never been any physical abuse though, just no question who's in charge.
 

Big Dreamer

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Fluoro:

I'm wondering if your troubled friend had considered jamming a non-lubricated broomhandle about 15 inches up his anus (while he was in a dead sleep), and breaking it off? While he deals frantically with his ensuing medical emergency she should have plenty of time to calmly pack her bags and hit the road. Just an option.
 

fluoro

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You are correct, Fluoro. There's a big difference between voluntarily assuming any given role because it has a complementary function in your life (as in the case of Holly) and assuming any given role because you feel that you have no choice, or you believe "that's the way things are supposed to be" or "I'm scared to try to change my situation."

I still say that a man who treats his partner as you describe above is simply overcompensating for his feelings of being weak and inadequate.

I think you're spot on with this assessment.
One phrase I'll never forget - which applies perfectly here: "He's strong with the weak, and weak with the strong".