Success with women = Lie

[B_Bonky]

Yes and sadly, I heard recently that paternity fraud is a big problem but there are no laws to protect the men who have been suckered into having to start paying the child support.

It really depends on where you are. Most countries now will protect a man who is not the father. BUT he has to catch it quick. That's why, as soon as the kid is brought home, the man should do a DNA test.

You can do it on the sly if you think the mother will pitch a hissy fit. For about $150 you can get a kit whereby you swab some of the man's saliva and the child's saliva, stick it in an envelope and mail it to the company. They will do a test and tell you within 90% certainty whether the man is the father. If you can get the mother's saliva you can get it closer to 95%. Now this is not good enough for legal purposes, but if it comes back that it's 90% sure you're NOT the dad, then you take the kid in and do a *real* DNA test which will be 99.999% accurate. Then you know fo' sho'.

If you're not on good terms with the mom, you can challenge paternity and have a court order a DNA test.

 

[blg3floor3]

I don't know if it is attention span.

The tear stains on my shoulder are dry.
The bitch who put them there is out fucking some asshole.
Don't have much else to do.

Well I was mainly thinking of how 95% of the people on any forum are content with one or two sentence or merely one or two word replies that are usually lame or annoying attempts at being witty or cool. They can't be bothered to read, acknowledge, or respond to longer, thoughtful, more in depth posts. ADD seems to be magnified and exaggerated pretty badly on the internet.

LOL spoken like a woman.. I'm looking forward to seeing how many men agree with that. :wink:

Well maybe the few that go out and deliberately adopt children they know aren't theirs :tongue:. But yeah, I doubt any of the guys suckered into raising the result of some other guy's night of blissfully busted nut from hot animalistic sex would agree.

It really depends on where you are. Most countries now will protect a man who is not the father. BUT he has to catch it quick.

So that shit I just said is true?! That's fucked up and not even remotely fair. That's taking "ignorance is no excuse" a little too far.

 

[B_Bonky]

I doubt any of the guys suckered into raising the result of some other guy's night of blissfully busted nut from hot animalistic sex would agree.

hahaah well put

 

[B_Bonky]

So that shit I just said is true?! That's fucked up and not even remotely fair. That's taking "ignorance is no excuse" a little too far.

Yup, generally the payments you make before realizing the kid isn't yours, aren't refundable. AND, at least where I am, if you don't challenge paternity within 2 years, you're the legal dad even if you find out later the kid isn't really yours.

So I just tell men: Even if you're "sure" the kid is yours, get a DNA test done as soon as the kid is born. If the mom has any sort of compassion, she'll understand the fears that men have and will not mind. If she goes apeshit, then you REALLY should get a DNA test done.

 

[Incocknito]

Pitbull = jealous of men who are successful with women

There's no need to insult people because you are jealous of their success with the opposite sex.

As with many things in life it comes down to confidence. Confidence is not synonymous or in any way related to lying.

Personally, I would rather be an interesting person with things to talk about than a boring, insecure or otherwise uninteresting person who has to make things up in order to keep women interested in him.

This thread reeks of bitterness. You are berating this "woman" who has wronged you and fair enough, she may be at fault. But you obviously have some faults of your own, which I'm guessing is why she left you.

 

[B_Bonky]

pitbull, and others, would be better off on iwforums.com ... there guys can go to bitch about how they've been wronged.

I just wanted to point out that women, ultimately, need a liar/rake/cad to be fully in love. Women might stay with an "honest" man and even raise his kids and perhaps not even cheat on him, but deep down inside they pine for the lovable liar. All the dashing men in history have been scoundrels. Mr. Consistent holds no allure for women.

 

[Daisy]

"Which would be OK
but then you run after a man that everyone (except the woman involved)
KNOWS 100%
is not:
interested in a relationship
totally self absorbed and treats you like dog shit on his shoe
Totally dishonest liar cheat
and he snaps his fingers
and you fuck him like a bitch in heat.
Cook his meals
Buy him things
Pay his bills
and then suddenly
he tosses you away
like a piece of toilet paper he wiped his shitty ass with
you cry and cry
usually on the shoulder of Mr. Nice Guy
and as soon as your tears are dry
Mr. Nice Guy watches you run off
to fuck the next Mr. Asshole."

Yes, I would love to explain. This is a sweeping generalization of course, and not all women are like this. I have NEVER tolerated men who treat me badly, in fact I can't think of a bigger turnoff than paying a guy's bills or having a guy treat me "like shit"
These are not the types of men I would be attracted to or any of my friends for that matter. Perhaps women in their teens and 20's tolerate this because they're insecure and don't know who they are. Maybe women with dangerously low self esteem do, but most women over the age of 30, I would hope would be confident enough to be with a man who treated her well.
Now as far as sexual attraction in general you CANNOT disregard the pure science of attraction: Biologists describe pheromones as "smellprints" supposedly as unique to each of us as our fingerprints. Smell is the most primitive of human senses and, unlike sight and touch, travels a direct route to the brain's limbic lobe where it can provoke an emotional reaction that can, quite literally, be a turn-on.
There's no doubt that pheromones underlie sexual and other types of behavior in animals, but given the complex human psyche, can these invisible lust signals be all you need for love? The scientific verdict is pending, but an increasing body of evidence suggests that the chemistry of sexual attraction and arousal is more nature than nurture and quite beyond our control. Not so far-fetched a notion considering how often we speak — and sing — of sexual chemistry.

So the question is, if you go back to human evolution are women programmed to be attracted to "caveman" types? The more aggressive, assertive man? My guess, would be that we are. If perpetuation of the human race depended on a woman finding a strong mate who would kill large animals and protect her young, then we likely carry on some of those instincts. That doesn't mean that I am consciously choosing assholes, but between culture, (real men don't cry) and biology I am probably most naturally drawn in that direction.
Women with any level of self esteem and maturity, however will know after having had their heart broken by the lying jerk who just wants to get laid and move on to the next conquest, that in the end she will need to find a more stable, long term partner.
So just as you can't say all men are manipulative liars, it is also equally true that not all women are pathetic doormats looking for a big dick and a fat wallet.
I don't think there will ever be a resolution to the age old debate of why "nice guys finish last". I think for every man who gets dumped for being "a nice guy" there is a woman getting her heart stepped on by a man who is too afraid of intimacy to have a meaningful relationship.

It cuts both ways.

 

[Kayden96]

I don't think there will ever be a resolution to the age old debate of why "nice guys finish last". I think for every man who gets dumped for being "a nice guy" there is a woman getting her heart stepped on by a man who is too afraid of intimacy to have a meaningful relationship.

It cuts both ways.

I don't think it really helps that the vast majority of people that initiate relationships are predators. The men that hit on women are usually the ones just looking for sex. The (exceedingly few) women that hit on men are generally looking for a dupe to take advantage of.

The "nice" girls that want the "nice" guys just sit back and expect him to knock on their door. The "nice" guys trip over themselves and are generally to shy/inept/whatever to make the first move. As previously mentioned, they usually wind up following whatever woman shows them the slightest amount of attention first.

The way society is set up really discourages non-predator types. "Nice" people hook up by having prolonged contact with someone. They generally work in the same place or have the same classes. They talk a little bit at a time and gradually connect. If you don't work with someone you're attracted to and you aren't the predatory type, you have next to no chance to get into a good relationship.

The only alternative to the work environment is trying to pick up someone in 2 minutes in a supermarket, gym, bar, or on the street. The quick pickup doesn't favor socially awkward nice guys; it favors the smooth talking sexual predators. Would you be tempted to say yes to a guy that asked you out on a date on the street when he was tripping over his words and couldn't maintain eye contact? We're conditioned by society to mistrust anyone we don't know. Don't talk to strangers on the street, they might rape you. Don't trust anyone, they'll probably take advantage of you. Oddly enough, generally the only people that do get trusted, are the charming, friendly guys that just want to "take advantage" of a woman.

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

It isn't a lie if you aren't picky, will bang a worn out hole, and do it in the dark.

 

[insilustry]

ur last paragraph has won my heart and soul, very tru kayden

 

[D_Humper E Bogart]

This thread so needs to be a permanent sticky.

As an aside. Intersting that the 'equals' sign means that both sides have the same value. That is, success with women IS a lie.

Because I'm feeling particularly spiteful, take note how many single rapists, murderers, paedophiles or terrorists there are out there...they don't exist! Heck, good odds that they're getting as much head as "the main man" Bonky!

 

[Pitbull]

I just wanted to point out that women, ultimately, need a liar/rake/cad to be fully in love. Women might stay with an "honest" man and even raise his kids and perhaps not even cheat on him, but deep down inside they pine for the lovable liar. All the dashing men in history have been scoundrels. Mr. Consistent holds no allure for women.

Ladies, care to comment?

 

[Kayden96]

Ladies, care to comment?

I can say it's true the opposite way. I have a woman who is loyal to a fault, but there is really no excitement there. Safety doesn't make you weak in the knees.

 

[Pitbull]

Yes, I would love to explain. This is a sweeping generalization of course,yes and not all women are like this true. I have NEVER tolerated emphasis on the word tolerated men who treat me badly, in fact I can't think of a bigger turnoff than paying a guy's bills or having a guy treat me "like shit"
These are not the types of men I would be attracted to or any of my friends for that matter. Perhaps women in their teens and 20's tolerate this because they're insecure and don't know who they are. Maybe women with dangerously low self esteem do, but most women over the age of 30, I would hope would be confident enough to be with a man who treated her well. After being shit on enough most people realize they are living a stinky existence and want to change

Now as far as sexual attraction in general you CANNOT disregard the pure science of attraction: Biologists describe pheromones as "smellprints" supposedly as unique to each of us as our fingerprints. Smell is the most primitive of human senses and, unlike sight and touch, travels a direct route to the brain's limbic lobe where it can provoke an emotional reaction that can, quite literally, be a turn-on.
There's no doubt that pheromones underlie sexual and other types of behavior in animals, but given the complex human psyche, can these invisible lust signals be all you need for love? The scientific verdict is pending, but an increasing body of evidence suggests that the chemistry of sexual attraction and arousal is more nature than nurture and quite beyond our control. Not so far-fetched a notion considering how often we speak — and sing — of sexual chemistry. and how does this fit in? OK to have sexual attraction. Another thing to claim a relationship is essential. Discount the good guys you claim to want to have a relationship and then have sex with someone on the pretext that there is a developing relationship when it is obvious the man is using the woman for sex

Women with any level of self esteem and maturity, however will know after having had their heart broken by the lying jerk who just wants to get laid and move on to the next conquest, that in the end she will need to find a more stable, long term partner.
Getting fucked and dumped loses its allure

So just as you can't say all men are manipulative liars, it is also equally true that not all women are pathetic doormats looking for a big dick and a fat wallet. True

I don't think there will ever be a resolution to the age old debate of why "nice guys finish last" Until nice guys get some notice and more important the not nice guys get noticed for what they are a lot sooner. I think for every man who gets dumped for being "a nice guy" there is a woman getting her heart stepped on by a man who is too afraid of intimacy to have a meaningful relationship.And maybe it is mostly her own fault

It cuts both ways.

Quick addendum

Tolerated
No most women do not tolerate at a certain level
but remember the original point
for success - lie
so women are gullible to the obvious lie
and when they finally notice the emperor has no clothes
they have had enough and do not tolerate any more
but
frequently find
another naked emperor
and eventually learn something from their mistakes
but not always

 

[Irish]

In my experience you don't have to lie, but being interesting certainly helps. I've also found more than a handful of attractive women that don't want to be treated poorly, beaten, or cheated on. Crazy world I live in.

I've never had to lie to a woman and have never had trouble picking one up. I'm not the sexiest guy around and I don't treat them like dirt, but somehow I manage.

 

[B_Bonky]

Heck, good odds that they're getting as much head as "the main man" Bonky!

I sincerely hope I'm not the one on these boards getting the most poon

Just a few days ago I had a first date with a broad who totally seemed like a hot thing at first and after a couple hours with me she closed up like a prune. Not even a hug before she sped away in her car.

And the week before that I had three (3) internet dates cancel or try to reschedule on me. Tonight though I have a date with a chick who's a sure lay, but I've been seeing her for months.

So my batting average blows. I just keep taking swings because I know it's just numbers baby. After almost a decade of online dating I do not take the shit seriously at all.

 

[Irish]

I sincerely hope I'm not the one on these boards getting the most poon

I think he meant: "The main man," Bonky.
Not to be confused with: "The main man Bonky."

Either that or you have a fan.

 

[deleted356736]

I think in most cases at the beginning of a relationship, a certain amount of lying happens, however you define it. Overlooking certain details, emphasising others, and so on. It depends on what and how much, and whether, in the long term, your judgement is that the relationship will survive the actual truth. For example, before we got serious, did I tell my now wife that I had more past sexual partners than I could remember? If the positions were reversed, would she? Later I admitted to many, probably 30 or 40, which was still an understatement. You may say she's the most beautiful woman you've ever met, whereas she's not but she's more special in other ways. That's a bit complex for the early stages of infatuation.

Complete truthfulness, which probably doesn't exist, but if it did, wouldn't necessarily get things going with someone you sense is very, very special. Total dishonesty is setting yourself up to fail in the fullness of time, so you need to make a special judgement call.

 

[helgaleena]

I am back after some time away and see that anxiety about the cost of having a child is well instilled in those posting here. That is good. I hope you are all being very careful about not making children. There are far too many childern out there who are not wanted by the persons who made them and are brought up poorly and damaged by it.

"Spoken like a woman"? no, spoken like someone who knows the difference between love and not-love. If there is a child, love it or send it where it will be loved. Better yet, perfect the art of sex without reproducing.

 

[helgaleena]

Pitbull's quick addendum:

Tolerated
No most women do not tolerate at a certain level
but remember the original point
for success - lie
so women are gullible to the obvious lie
and when they finally notice the emperor has no clothes
they have had enough and do not tolerate any more
but
frequently find
another naked emperor
and eventually learn something from their mistakes
but not always

"gullible to the obvious lie" is not always it. Sometimes it is "play along to the obvious game".