Suicide Trend In Males And Lack Of Sex... Insight?

AtYourCervix10

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Hey guys, so I was listening to a podcast stating that the suicide rate in males is climbing here in California. Maybe they're fringe cases of homeless or those predisposed by depression, but it does seem to be going up regardless. Also, there was an article recently too about how men are having less sex these days. what are your thoughts on the two and do you think they're related? I know the COVID life has definitely taxed us mentally, as we are forced to be isolated and many people are losing their jobs, livelihood and source of income.

even prior to covid, however, middle aged men were statistically proven the most vulnerable to suicide.

Just a hypothesis, but i do believe the American male is in crisis. I know my sense of value as a straight male can often be confused with how much I earn, how my career is going, and a fruitful relationship with women. I also know living in CA, i was on the front lines of MeToo movement, and many men here were losing their careers (although many across the country claimed not to be affected by MeToo). But, if the economy is bad, if career options dwindle, if women dont want to meet because they're scared of COVID, it can be a source of depression. I do think that I live in a bubble in California. The trends and mentality here is quite possibly very different than life elsewhere in the US. For example, i've had several guy friends who let their girlfriends visit LA, and their girlfriends come back and break up with them. True stories.

I'm just asking for your take on the situation. Not asking for sympathy. just perspective. be safe. look after each other.

thanks!
 
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Mike hung

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Suicide is apparently up here in the UK

No worries here with sex I'm married and got it on tap

Recent documentary over here saying how the lockdown is going to be the next wave of boomers here but obviously that only applies to those in relationships inside lockdown

I also earn damn good money and sure that helps in any relationship to an extent security wise, I've never let on my earnings when getting into a relationship though.
However I've always found it easy to pick up women, I've always put that down to my character, presence and the way I carry myself.
 

swingfun

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I don't think that a lack of sex would be THE cause of suicide. Maybe a small contribuiting factor. Not sure i'm not a psychologiat. It seems to me some main factors would be job loss,this covid shit keeping people cooped up and maybe drug addiction. Seems it would be difficult to keep the will to live if all those things were weighing on me. It seems like this has hit California harder than other areas. Just my take on this.
 

AtYourCervix10

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interesting. you're married, and have no problem picking up women?

yes, some people are making a lot of money through this. and some arent.

good for you man.


Suicide is apparently up here in the UK

No worries here with sex I'm married and got it on tap

Recent documentary over here saying how the lockdown is going to be the next wave of boomers here but obviously that only applies to those in relationships inside lockdown

I also earn damn good money and sure that helps in any relationship to an extent security wise, I've never let on my earnings when getting into a relationship though.
However I've always found it easy to pick up women, I've always put that down to my character, presence and the way I carry myself.
 

longstroke7

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i think society in general is taking a serious toll on mental health here in America. People are struggling, the Healthcare system sucks, people are lonely, etc. America is becoming a shit hole that is a cesspool of greed and people who lack basic empathy.

I can only speak for myself, but I find daily life in this country to be a toxic mess, and covid has just added to it. Then we have the hatred and racism, the government being beholden to the wealthy, so on and so forth.

Millenials joke about suicide a LOT, but I know for a fact that those aren't just jokes. People are tired and see no light at the end of the tunnel. Death seems to looked at as relief from all of this.
 

AtYourCervix10

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interesting. i didn't realize millenials joke about suicide. i thought they were the ones raised on impenetrable optimism that were encouraged as kids to just try and you'll be okay.

i agree also, i can only speak for myself, but i agree with you. twitter is a dumpster fire of toxicity. nobody goes there to post positive affirmations. It's just a forum for drive by kill shots to people's credibility, careers and reputation. it's a format that rewards venom.

i feel like we're in uncharted waters. things are unraveling and eroding fast. the american dream is dead. we're in the midst of some kind of cultural shift, but i dont think it's close to being over. before, the sense of community was strong and somewhat unified, we could whether devastating events, but now, everybody's on edge. whatever we're going through will take years to overcome. people lack hope. there is huge disparity in wealth, and most people are living week to week, but then again, there are more billionaires than ever. ugh.

curious though. how are you all coping? for example, i can't watch zeitgeist TV shows and avoid social media. For example, everybody is preaching about BLM and apologizing. (as you can tell from my pics, I'm a white guy) and I'm tired of feeling bad, guilty, offending, and sorry for things i have nothing to do with. All the Netflix,HULU and Amazon programming suddenly became all about about Black themes and slavery.... Right now, i have this gut revulsion to any cop shows or anything where i feel like race is a theme or an issue. I mean, all i have to do is turn on CNN or go to twitter to see that in real life. right?

So I find myself going back to old movies for escapism. like the original Star Wars. (before Disney messed them up.) Spielberg movies, Jaws, Raiders, ET... find myself going back to escapist movies that made me feel good. does that make sense? am I alone? am I crazy?

how are you all coping? any tips? thanks!



i think society in general is taking a serious toll on mental health here in America. People are struggling, the Healthcare system sucks, people are lonely, etc. America is becoming a shit hole that is a cesspool of greed and people who lack basic empathy.

I can only speak for myself, but I find daily life in this country to be a toxic mess, and covid has just added to it. Then we have the hatred and racism, the government being beholden to the wealthy, so on and so forth.

Millenials joke about suicide a LOT, but I know for a fact that those aren't just jokes. People are tired and see no light at the end of the tunnel. Death seems to looked at as relief from all of this.
 
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Mike hung

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interesting. you're married, and have no problem picking up women?

yes, some people are making a lot of money through this. and some arent.

good for you man.

I meant picking up women in general bruh, mostly before I was married.
However my wife and myself do also enjoy the swing life.
 

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You're right to come off Twitter - my own mental health was suffering when I was posting there obsessively. Now I just observe it from a distance just to see general trends in posting and not getting sucked in to individual shit-slinging. You can get this feeling like you *need* to be on these platforms - but your analysis is correct, nothing is actually solved there, and you don't need to read anybody's tweets.

Guilt is not a good spot to be in, and anyone who actually wants you to feel guilty is probably just trying to sow division. As an anecdote, here in the UK I was only introduced to the idea of "white guilt" a few years back by a Right-Winger (who turned out to be a White Supremacist) who really wanted me to understand white guilt so that I would then get angry about it. I had never had a LW or a non-white person try to inflict it on me before that. I do not believe it is a goal of BLM to make white people feel guilty just for being white - if you get that feeling from the Zeitgeist then you are definitely not the only person who finds this alienating and you're right to just switch those shows off. I'm left-leaning as you can probably tell but I still find a lot of those shows way too preachy.

I don't know what you mean when you say you were "on the front lines of MeToo movement" but this is really for whoever needs to read it. You seem to flirt with an idea that I have seen extreme RWs put more simply, i.e. that increased male suicide is the direct result of increased women's rights, not just MeToo but anything that gets them out of the bedroom/kitchen. What I always say to those people is, that relationships are not supposed to be zero-sum games. Your life should not get worse every time your partner or your potential partners's lives get better.

The best versions of feminism are aiming to make life better for both men and women, basically because happy/fulfilled/empowered women make more fulfilling partners. It should only hurt you if you are absolutely determined that your womenfolk are going to be subservient. Maybe just an unfortunate turn of phrase but I noticed you said your friends "let their girlfriends go to LA", and yeh, men whose girlfriends require their permission to go places are gonna find the cultural shifts that are happening pretty tough. It's possible to change that attitude rather than end up depressed/suicidal. I'm putting this in a mental health thread rather than shit-slinging about this sort of thing in the Politics section because it's the best advice I've got.
 
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AtYourCervix10

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i think this is all good. thank you very much for sharing. i agree with you and i'm glad i'm not alone :)


You're right to come off Twitter - my own mental health was suffering when I was posting there obsessively. Now I just observe it from a distance just to see general trends in posting and not getting sucked in to individual shit-slinging. You can get this feeling like you *need* to be on these platforms - but your analysis is correct, nothing is actually solved there, and you don't need to read anybody's tweets.

Guilt is not a good spot to be in, and anyone who actually wants you to feel guilty is probably just trying to sow division. As an anecdote, here in the UK I was only introduced to the idea of "white guilt" a few years back by a Right-Winger (who turned out to be a White Supremacist) who really wanted me to understand white guilt so that I would then get angry about it. I had never had a LW or a non-white person try to inflict it on me before that. I do not believe it is a goal of BLM to make white people feel guilty just for being white - if you get that feeling from the Zeitgeist then you are definitely not the only person who finds this alienating and you're right to just switch those shows off. I'm left-leaning as you can probably tell but I still find a lot of those shows way too preachy.

I don't know what you mean when you say you were "on the front lines of MeToo movement" but this is really for whoever needs to read it. You seem to flirt with an idea that I have seen extreme RWs put more simply, i.e. that increased male suicide is the direct result of increased women's rights, not just MeToo but anything that gets them out of the bedroom/kitchen. What I always say to those people is, that relationships are not supposed to be zero-sum games. Your life should not get worse every time your partner or your potential partners's lives get better.

The best versions of feminism are aiming to make life better for both men and women, basically because happy/fulfilled/empowered women make more fulfilling partners. It should only hurt you if you are absolutely determined that your womenfolk are going to be subservient. Maybe just an unfortunate turn of phrase but I noticed you said your friends "let their girlfriends go to LA", and yeh, men whose girlfriends require their permission to go places are gonna find the cultural shifts that are happening pretty tough. It's possible to change that attitude rather than end up depressed/suicidal. I'm putting this in a mental health thread rather than shit-slinging about this sort of thing in the Politics section because it's the best advice I've got.
 
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