Surrogacy?

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by B_Think_Kink, Aug 10, 2007.

  1. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Do you think that you would be able to do this for a friend?
    Background info...
    One of my gay friends whom I've been close to for many years asked me this. "When we get older... would you have a kid for me? ... That way we could have a piece of each other forever." And I thought, it didn't seem like such a bad idea as I don't want to really have kids, but I think I would like to give someone one when they couldn't.

    Has anyone else done this? for a friend, relative?
     
  2. SassySpy

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    gosh, TK, cos I cant have kids this has come to mind so frequently for me- and I think it is so sweet of you to even consider doing such a thing for people who can't.
    Personally, if I could, I would likely feel the same way. I wouldn't have to think twice about doing it for someone I deeply cared for- I'm not sure how I'd feel about strangers? Unless I knew for sure the child would have a good home.... I don't think I'd have a problem with staying out of the loop emotionally or physically, once it was done, but again, I have no true idea as I have no frame of reference.
    but bless you for bringing up the question- it is really an important issue for a lot of people.
     
  3. SpoiledPrincess

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    Sharing a child with someone who isn't your partner would be extremely difficult, if a couple divorces the arguments over the child can reach epic proportions, I think having a child with someone you never even had a partnership with in the beginning would be even more problematic. What if he wanted to move and take the child with him? What about child support? What if he suddenly meets someone and decides that your relationship as the mother of the child interferes with his new relationship? What if your ideas on raising the child are different? Not forgetting the responsiblity of the child, a 24 hour a day responsiblity that lasts at least 16 years.
     
  4. SassySpy

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    If only more people would put that much thought into it before having a child of their own.......
    it would make jobs like mine obsolete....
     
  5. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Well that would be the point. He would go off and raise the kid after it was born with his partner. I would just be the womb.
     
  6. SpoiledPrincess

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    What happens if you have the child, you look at it and find that against what you expected you're suddenly overwhelmed with love?
     
  7. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    I don't think I could love something I knew was not mine to keep in the first place. I would tell the child I loved it all the time in the womb. Bring the child to a start where they felt love, and a safe area to start life. Maybe I would arrange it so that I could at least be a mother to this child. It would depend on the partners.
     
  8. SpoiledPrincess

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    I do admire women who have a baby for someone else who'd be a fabulous parent and offer the child a really good life, but I often wonder if they know what they're getting into. If I'd have done it I know I wouldn't have been able to give it up when it came to it, I could say I wasn't going to keep it, try to intellectually prepare myself for giving it up, but all the while there's that baby kicking away inside you, you begin to know it before it's even born and I can't imagine giving it away even to my sister or a very loved friend.
     
  9. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    I hate to say but i dont think i could, well not at this point in my life anyway. Maybe later if i see a freind either who is gay and REALLy wants a child or a straight friend who has ben trying and just cant get pregnant. But i just dont think i could stand back and not want a major role in the childs life.

    Ad if something happened to the child i doubt i could forgiven myself for putting in that situation and in the care of that person
     
  10. diamond

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    Call me greedy, but no way in hell would I do this for another person. If I carry a child for 9 months, that child is mine regardless. Knowing myself anyways, I wouldn't let anyone impregnate me other than someone I really love and care about. It's the only way I would bring a child into this world.:redface::redface:

    So to answer your question, nope wouldn't, couldn't do it. My womb is not for rent nor for hire......and my eggs are mine all of them.:smile:
     
  11. hyperionic

    hyperionic New Member

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    I know of couples whove done that. worked out great.. but i do think you'd have to be very clear on some ground rules..
     
  12. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Maybe if you couldn't have kids you'd think differently.
    Of course.
     
  13. Not_Punny

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    I know one woman who was the surrogate womb for a couple unable to have kids. I also know the family/kid who benefited. Everyone was happy. But this isn't something that I could personally do.:wink:
     
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