Sympathy Fucks

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by PlatinumLavender, Apr 17, 2009.

  1. PlatinumLavender

    PlatinumLavender New Member

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    Ok, here's my situation. I am a married woman, happily so I might add. Which makes this situation all the more complex I suppose.

    I recently met a man while playing sports that is strangely attractive. He is not the type I usually find attractive. He is married also. We managed to mingle into sexual conversation that ended up pretty hot. He showed me a pic of his cock which was quite nice. I found myself fantasizing about it constantly. We see each other several times a week in a public venue to practice sports. The sexual tension is unreal and the adrenaline rush of it makes me feel like a teenager again.

    In talking with him I found out he is incredibly sexually neglected by his wife. I have met her and I'd admit she is very much an ice queen as far as her regular personality goes. The more I found out- such as he never gets laid but maybe once or twice a year. She won't let him see her naked. He NEVER gets a blow job, hand job or anything. The more I want to fuck his brains out and show him a good time.

    We visit about various things through the computer and phone, but honestly I am starting to not feel so sorry for him anymore and his marital situation. He is still very attractive to me but to think that I almost sucked/fucked him out of getting the hornies.......led me to think that I was actually going into a sympathy fuck situation.

    It's turning me off because more of his persona is coming through and I begin to see some of the things that might be a turn off for his wife. I really don't know what to do about it since I see him regularly at this point.

    Sorry for rambling on but I sure could use some sort of advice as I feel I have gotten in over my head.

    PL
     
  2. specz

    Verified Gold Member

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    It's just the "springtime hornies". You'll both get over it soon enough.
     
  3. invisibleman

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    Sounds like you already fucked the guy...and you want an exit strategy.
     
  4. PlatinumLavender

    PlatinumLavender New Member

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    I doubt it. We've tried to meet up to do some fun stuff on the side but his "old lady" keeps such a tight leash on him that I've given up. I think I am getting pissy because I tried to make a way for it to happem multiple times but he lives in fear of doing anything to make her angry. The lengths he goes to to keep her from finding out when she's so nosey is astounding.

    When I lay in bed awake and wonder why I am risking this kind of problem for my marriage....I realize its because I want to be the woman his wife would never want to show him. How selfish of me. It's all about sympathy and my ego.

    I see his weakness towards her and then I get really turned off. I've gone out of my way a lot and the favor hasn't been returned. Now he senses something is wrong and honestly I don't feel like making the effort anymore.
     
  5. invisibleman

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    Well, leave the guy alone. That would be the best exit strategy and a humane way of handling each other's situations. Both of you attend to each own relationships.
     
  6. Captain Elephant

    Captain Elephant Active Member

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    A twist on the old saying: no matter how handsome, attractive and personable he seems somebody, somewhere is tired of putting up with his shit.

    His shit is not apparent right now, but as soon as you get him in the sack you'll probably be stepping in it pretty quickly.

    Temptation is an interesting thing. Some people are never bothered by temptation; they just give in at the first urge. Temptation whets the sexual appetite. It increases the horniness factor by double. Temptation is like waiting for Christmas morning. After the presents are unwrapped you might say "I waited for this crap?"

    Leave it alone, dear. Unless your marriage is the pits why trade for his?
     
  7. B_blessed boy

    B_blessed boy New Member

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    that guy is already in too deep, he doesnt have much to risk and if anythting blows up u wont want him after. if it twas just hot steamy sex in thte showers, bitting on ur bath robe trying not to let anyone hear u kinda thing i'd say go ahead feed ur body on pleasure but this situation is simply not worth it.
    if i were u i'd find some teenager (18-22) and flirt a bit c wat happns. same think but no complication. i'm looking for a older woman right now. i think every teen wants 1.
     
  8. Roscoz

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    Id say suck and fuck the poor guy dry ...
     
  9. hungthickone

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    Whats wrong with your own marriage?Husband not doin something right? is thsi a size issue?
     
  10. CALAMBO

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    Let me see....well here it goes...affairs of the heart can ruin lives....but the risk associated with such may be worth the hour of lust...then what...more or is it over...i say if you can live with the GUILT...and secrets...fuck him and yourself silly....asking permission here will not give you the green light to make it all seem RIGHT.....myself...i would say PITY FUCKS...are not worth the effort....If you want to have an affair do it for yourself not some looser that is whipped by a wife that you seem to dislike...that may be the real PITY PARTY here....good luck.
     
  11. D_Cock_Hudson

    D_Cock_Hudson New Member

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    Don't is my opinion.
     
  12. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink New Member

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    Doubt means don't. Sketchy situation too.
     
  13. hockeyguy741

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    Whats wrong in your relationship why are you having these thoughts? the guy sounds a bit sketchy Once you have the affair you can't go back, what do you have to loose compared to him?
     
  14. Wish-4-8

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    If you are happy with your own marriage, then stay away.
    It is human nature to be tempted. Not to get all religious, but Jesus Christ was tempted for 40 days in the desert. Temptation is not the sin since you cannot control that. What you do about it is the crime because that is something you can control.
    Acting on the temptation is they make up of who you are.
    You have a choice right now.
    You should take the time to review the wedding vows you took and see what is important in your life.
    If temptation is an issue for you, and you easily give in, then you should avoid situations that tempt you. Another choice. Be fair to yourself and your husband.
     
  15. Gillette

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    If she's neglecting him why keep such close tabs on him?

    I'm catching a whiff of serial cheater. He's got the perfect (and most clichéd) hook.
    Him: "I'm neglected."
    Woman: "Oh you poor dear, let me make it all better."

    And he's got a wife with all the paranoid tendencies of a woman who has caught her man cheating before. Her ice queen behaviour towards you could be that she sees you as another of his infidelities waiting to happen (which you've confirmed for us here).

    My guess is should you ever show him 'what a real woman can do for him' he'll be plying the same woebegone tale on the next woman.

    If, as he says, his marriage is a sexually barren hell it's his own responsibility to fix it or get himself out of it. It's not your job to make it more bearable for him.

    How about instead of being the wife he wishes he had, you be the wife your husband deserves.
     
  16. HazelGod

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    People who say this should be donkey punched, hokay? :tongue:
     
  17. Drifterwood

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    I was fed this line once and swallowed it. She later admitted to affairs for the past seventeen years. I do still feel sympathy for people who have sexless marriages, but as Mr. Dylan said, "No Babe, it ain't me your looking for, Babe." Actually that was a Baez song originally, I think.
     
  18. Pitbull

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    Your marriage isn’t as happy as you say it is.
    It needs work and you should get on that

    Do your sports elsewhere.

    Stop all phone calls
    Erase everything having to do with him from your computer.

    If he really is – big if – that is HIS problem.
    If his marriage has problems, he needs to find a solution that does not ruin another marriage.
    His solutions are:
    1.)Put up with it
    2.)Get out of it
    3.)Cheat – if he chooses this – let it be with some other person


    The advice has been given by me and others.
    Whether of not you take it is up to you.

    But what you should do is take it.
    Lose him completely. Work on your marriage.

    We all see trouble for you given the situation you have described.
    We hope you are not in over your head.

    If you are in the water and it is up to your neck, if you keep walking out to sea it will be over your head.
    Turn around and walk back to shore.
     
  19. joybunny

    joybunny New Member

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  20. aaatx8

    aaatx8 New Member

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    Of all the people you encounter while married this is one of the worst to have a fling with. You could never get rid of him. Children, your husband, and your friends deserve better than you flailing around with this loser.
    Think about it, go home keep your mouth shut and fuck your husband's brains out till this moron is out of your mind. I have done stuff like this with women while married. I assure you I regret each time.
     
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