suaige: well that thas to be about the most entertaining thread I have read. Any way, if you are going to use tape,duct tape is the type to use. Models use it for perkiness, and I hear it is one of the boosters of choice in beauty contests.
It is water proof from the outside, thus the origin of the name duck tape, before it was used on ducts. But it also won't stick & will come off if you sweat. I guess tearing it off doesn't hurt as much as you might think.