Ten Reasons to be Antisocial

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by HazelGod, Nov 30, 2008.

  1. HazelGod

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    Not like I needed external validation that the majority of you are barely-evolved fuckwits unworthy of my time, but this made for some smiley reading...


    Ten Reasons to be Antisocial

    1. Genius is antisocial
    This does not mean that by being antisocial you automatically adopt the status of genius, but it does mean that if you, by some slim chance are, in fact, a genius, you will have no patience for average and below-average humanity. You will see it as annoying and distracting like a high-schooler being forced to endure a day in pre-school. You will seek to isolate yourself and work. Again, the choice to isolate yourself and work does not necessarily indicate genius, just a slightly higher possibility of it. Very slightly. Writing, painting, working on complex math problems, all solitary work for the most part. Genius needs room to concentrate.

    2. Less drama

    Which is not to say no drama. If you are human and you live around humans you will have drama. It does not matter if you mind your own business and keep to yourself, trust me, the cunts and assholes will find you. Being genuinely antisocial ensures that you will run into this less, which is not to say, never. Be ready for it, but going under the radar means that you probably won’t have to dig more than one shallow grave per decade.

    3. You gain insight
    You cannot ever be rid of people entirely. I know this, I have tried. Hell, even Howard Hughes, the modern prophet of anti-socialism still had to deal with his lawyers. People, however, will be reduced to bite-sized chunks. You will be able to analyze them as you take your breaks from analyzing more important things. Spend enough time thinking about enough data and you come to some pretty interesting conclusions. The fact is that most people reveal far more than is immediately obvious in the course of a casual conversation, you just have to put it under a microscope, which means it needs isolated, and you need private time look at it.

    4. Relationships require effort
    Usually of the non-rewarding kind. Relationships with chicks involve doing things that serve no practical purpose whatsoever, as gestures. Chicks love gestures. You take this much effort it means that you love me this much. The idea that there is no correlation between love and effort for a man never occurs to them. I think this all started with that old Percy Sledge song “When a Man Loves a Woman” in which the singer tells all the things men will do for women they love. It was BS made to sell records. Effort is what men put out when there is a tangible reward at the end of the job. Like sex. The gestures are all about sex, not to show affection. Those flowers are not merely because I know you like flowers and I want to make you happy, they are because I know you like flowers and I want to fuck you.

    5. Conversation-padding

    A 2-hour conversation usually only consists of about 10-20 minutes of actual worthwhile information sharing. The rest is padded out with small-talk, awkward pauses while somebody thinks of something to say, and boring droning that blends into the background for the listener. Long conversations usually only happen when both people are stuck in one place together and want the satisfaction of “having shared” at the end of their sentence, meaning that they want a conversation for the sake of having one, not because it actually makes sense to communicate. This results in a lot of your life being wasted talking to people and needless stress as you share meaningless nonsense.

    6. Low expectations

    Nobody expects you to be the life of the party, nobody comes knocking on your door at 3am looking for a shoulder to cry on. This means you don’t get invited to tedious functions and you get to avoid the truly thankless job of being a free therapist to your friends and acquaintances. Being antisocial means that people see you as a closed door, one that they might as well pretend is not there. This might sound like a bad thing, but it is not. We have been taught that happiness depends on being social, but there is no happiness, just the pretense of it. Why waste time looking for something that does not exist?

    7. You get balls
    What it is is that you don’t care what people think of you. It may bug you that some piece of trash out there has the balls to insult you (different from taking offense at the insult itself), but then you know they are a piece of trash and you get over it. Being insulted by someone you have no respect for is very different from being insulted by somebody who matters, who you at some point thought highly of. I will give you an example: your neighbor’s chihuahua barks at you from his owner’s front porch, does it offend you that this dog does not like you, or are you just irritated by the bark and annoyed that it does not know how small and contemptible it is? For the antisocial person everybody but a very select few (with whom you have limited contact) are chihuahuas. Fuck ‘em.

    8. You don’t miss out on a whole lot

    Most people have little to offer aside from the psychological comfort of being around another human being. They are not fun or interesting to anybody, least of all for the people who settle for them. In all but a few instances you could lose a relationship and feel very little, but even when you do, it’s pretty much always survivable. You lose that comfort from being around a particular person, but that’s more about adjusting to change than anything else. The point is that people are not all that important, not all that interesting, not all that fun, not all that essential. You would be making a better use of your time doing a crossword puzzle or learning a few words in a foreign language than hanging out with them.

    9. Comforting self-deception
    If you are just an antisocial moron, then it’s probably a good idea to isolate yourself so that you can tell yourself that you are, in fact a genius and that nobody recognizes what you are because they are all so stupid. Self-aggrandizing delusion needs isolation in order to reach it’s full annoying potential. It’s annoying to everybody else, but rewards the bearer with a tremendous sense of martyrdom which, in many cases, is the only reason they have to not commit suicide.

    10. It helps you deal with loneliness

    The most sociable, chatty, clingy, blowhards out there, the ones who try to spend as little time alone as possible, for them being alone is the same thing as being lonely. For the antisocial loneliness is very different from the sensation of being alone, they are two distinctly separate feelings. The anti-social can feel loneliness, but it’s rare. You treasure the moments with no distractions, no background movement, no responsibilities beyond what you have in front of you. That is largely, I suspect, a learned reaction to being alone a lot, but it’s good since everybody has to be alone at some point and it’s best to see it as a gift rather than a burden.
     
  2. Drifterwood

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    I've got better things to do than read your stupid fucking list.
     
  3. Xcuze

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    Hmmm Ive never thought of myself as antisocial but I definitely relate to at least half of those.

    Maybe Im Semi-antisocial....? :rolleyes:
     
  4. Gillette

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    I can't argue with too many of those points.
     
  5. rob_just_rob

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    Much of it makes sense.

    This would be more helpful if there was a "Ten reasons to be social" list that you could put beside this one. Then, every morning, you could check off how many on each list apply for you that day, sum up the check marks for each list, and govern yourself accordingly.
     
  6. Stretch

    Stretch New Member

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    Everything on that list is about right...especially number 10. I don't consider them reasons necessarily, but more as beneficial byproducts. :smile: Good one HG
     
  7. Scrufuss

    Scrufuss New Member

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    11. It saves money at christmas time
     
  8. HazelGod

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    It's not a checklist by which you judge past behaviors...it's a rationale for making the affirmative decision to be (or continue to be) antisocial.
     
  9. Scrufuss

    Scrufuss New Member

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    Oh Bah Humbug!

    :kabong:
     
  10. HazelGod

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    Precisely.
     
  11. nay-nay

    nay-nay New Member

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    i agree with most of it.

    for the last 3 years, i've spent most of my time alone. i used to be very social and outgoing. and at first it was very hard for me to be alone. but i've found that i enjoy being alone more than i enjoy spending time with others. once in a while i want to hang out with a friend, but most of the time i just want to be alone. i like to think about all sorts of things.

    i've realised quite a bit of things, and i'm damn proud of myself.
     
  12. Scrufuss

    Scrufuss New Member

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    I did not say yip, precisly or otherwise. Please do not put words or anything else in my mouth without prior consent.
     
  13. HazelGod

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    Yes, escargots are quite tasty.
     
  14. Scrufuss

    Scrufuss New Member

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    I like to step on and make them pop up between my toes with a squishy-slurpy pop before they are cooked.. Kind of tenderizes the meat.
     
  15. Deno

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    people that are antisocial are less likely to get screwed over by so called friends.
    being antisocial is cheaper.

    I don't have to let anyone borrow my car

    no one hits me up for cash

    I rarely am asked to do favors for people when I feel like doing nothing at all.

    I save gas because I almost never have to give people a ride somewhere.

    and agreed it saves money at christmas.

    Also I have a very slim chance of being one of those innocent bystanders that gets shot and killed.
     
    #15 Deno, Nov 30, 2008
    Last edited: Nov 30, 2008
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