Terrible Puns

[Babyfacedassassin]

Reply with a similar style pun.

I wanted to be a Milkman, but I didn't have the bottle.

 

[mitchymo]

My diet is going well, i lost 20pounds this week, now i cant afford the pies!

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

I wanted to be a doctor, but I didn't have the patience.

 

[Babyfacedassassin]

I wanted to be a juggler, but I didn't have the balls.

 

[Not_Punny]

Who needs bottles? Any bucket will do. And when you've milked one cow, then you can milk the udder one.

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

Who needs bottles? Any bucket will do. And when you've milked one cow, then you can milk the udder one.

And when you're ready to leave this world and pass on your business, you can just kick the bucket.

 

[Babyfacedassassin]

You invented Tipp Ex, correct me if I'm wrong.

 

[Not_Punny]

Oh, bucket, here's another pun: I wanted to raise goats, but my parents thought I was just kidding.

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

I was going to raise sheep, but decided to stay home and bleat off, thinking of ewe.

 

[Not_Punny]

And what do you call it when a dinosaur collides with a big rig? A Tyrannosaurus Rex...

 

[Babyfacedassassin]

Oh, bucket, here's another pun: I wanted to raise goats, but my parents thought I was just kidding.

I used to collect blood in a bucket, made me quite pail.

 

[Not_Punny]

:dance: Oh, good ones!!!

Did you know that reported sightings of the abominable snowman are yeti to be confirmed.

 

[Babyfacedassassin]

Exit signs...they're on the way out aren't they?

 

[Not_Punny]

I was going to raise sheep, but decided to stay home and bleat off, thinking of ewe.

I would NEVER tell you to flock off!

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

Or, like the Palestinian woman said after her son became a suicide bomber ... "They blow up so fast."

 

[Not_Punny]

Exit signs...they're on the way out aren't they?

I thought exits were what teachers wrote on wrong answers.

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

I thought exits were what teachers wrote on wrong answers.

No ... Exit marks the Spot-it.

 

[mitchymo]

This thread is so bad it ought to be a court summons

 

[Not_Punny]

Or, like the Palestinian woman said after her son became a suicide bomber ... "They blow up so fast."

They wear bomber jackiets, don't they?!

 

[D_Chaumbrelayne_Copprehead]

This thread is so bad it ought to be a court summons

Are you judging us? Will you supply us with bailiff we're convicted?

I'm gonna escape by jumping over defense ...