I hesitate to say anything, since most of it has been said before. IT comes down to context. If you use a term in a way intended to hurt or insult, it is an offensive term. That is the risk in using a such a term intended for a wide audience, which this form qualifies as. Using it in context with a group of friends who have agreed not totake the term as a personal attack isi usually considered OK---yes, we have all gottent to be increadibly sensitive, but maybe that's because we have started becoming aware that words are weapons, and have to be used, just as weapons are, carefully. I personally find the N word, for instance,very ugly, and the only time it ever comes out of me is when my fathers words are triggered in my brain. Not something I am proud of, but something which I have actively fought in myself my entire life. I personally was not insulted by you, even though I am a gay man, but then, I don't know you, and you haven't done anything to earn my respect, therefore you can't insult or hurt me. If you were a good straight friend, and called me a fag in a hurtful context, I would be hurt and insulted, and offended. Just because a negative term has become common usage, doesn;t make it any more or less right. There was a time not too long ago when the N word was in common usage-which didn;t make it any more right then than it does now. Just as an aside, I find it kind of comical that the N word got to be the most negative term--considering it came from what amounts to the laziness and inability of the white people back in the day, who were incapable of pronouncing Niger, the region where many were stolen from....but I digress.....
