The desire to BE another guy

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by B_henry miller, Sep 16, 2008.

  1. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    This is so weird to write about. But here goes....

    It's so weird, but I don't want to have sex with another man -- but I like to know how other (straight) men experience their bodies, how they feel about their bodies, what it's like to be who they are, etc.

    It's so neurotic. It's weird because it feels like a violation on some levels. It's none of my business how other men feel about their bodies, how they feel about being who they are, etc. And at some level it even feels gay.

    It's weird, because I look at some of the gallery pictures and think some of the guys there are awesome and it would be awesome to BE these guys, and then I feel guity for looking. LOL.

    Lately, the guy I'd really love to be is these guys. These guys are awesome:

    http://www.lpsg.org/gallery/showgallery.php/cat/500/page/1/ppuser/292790

    http://www.lpsg.org/members/jrobinsonpimp.html

    Hey. Maybe this means I want to be black. LOL.
     
    #1 B_henry miller, Sep 16, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2008
  2. unabear09

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    you are not alone man! I have the exact same feelings about certain other men. If I see some handsome looking guy with a killer body, and so forth.....I like to imagine that I am them. Getting all of the attention from the women, feeling what its like to be in his skin. Now this is where my little % of gayness comes in. I love to masturbate to guys like this masturbating. I like to kind of .........idk like leave my body in a sense, and imagine that I'm him with his cock feeling of his/my body and cock. Odd, I know, but still.
     
  3. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    Actually, that's very similar to what I experience.

    The thing is, this goes on in all walks of male life. Males hang posters of their favorite rock stars and athletes on their walls and imagine what it is to BE these guys. This is obviously why men are included in straight porn, because they are a stand-in for the male viewer.

    There's this odd sense of underlying guilt, though. Like, when I see a good looking guy on this forum, I imagine what it is to BE him -- but then I feel less than masculine for having felt that he is MORE masculine (more of a man) than I am; AND I feel like a douch bag for objectifying the guy.

    All men probably go through this to some extent.
     
  4. D_Roland_D_Hay

    D_Roland_D_Hay Account Disabled

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    Ah...don't feel like a douch bag. There are always going to be guys that seem to be godlike...but that guy might wonder what its like to be you!
     
  5. Rowan Ravenseed

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    I think this desire has two fronts...... the first is because as rico said the vast majority of people have some-one they idolize in one form or another and we all wish to be like that person.

    On a more subtle not that very few people would understand or appreciate is that its a simplified expression of our own godhood. Whether we accept it or not all forms of intimacy be it friendship family or lover. All desire for closeness to another or understanding of another is just our own selves recognizing our self in another form and subconsciously expressing that there is something in that form we appreciate. Hmmmm this is probably getting a little too tripped out for you guys so ill sum it up.

    You want to be that person because a deeper part of you all ready recognizes that you are that person and your two levels of consciousness are trying to reconcile that recognition.
     
  6. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    Uh. Yeah. Too deep for this forum. LOL. :biggrin1: Shove me in the shallow water before I get too deep.

    Maybe at some level this awareness of a sort of continuum and connection with another man is contrary to what we think masculinity means. Masculinity is usually about setting boundaries. And here masculinity is seen as a way of connecting. Does that make any sense?

    Ugh. Shudder. Too deep. LOL. :rocketwhore:
     
    #6 B_henry miller, Sep 16, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 16, 2008
  7. earllogjam

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    I had the same kinds of feelings idolizing and wanting to be like certain men as an adolescent and I turned out gay.

    All guys probably go thru this. I don't think it's a gay / straight issue but it probably has something to do with boys wanting to be men.
     
  8. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    Interesting response. Thanks.
     
  9. prince_will

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    what about Man crushes? It's basically about loving and idolizing another man, but not to the point of having sex with him. I know alot of straight guys who would consider Tom Brady to be a Man crush/guy they'd like to be. He's handsome (though n one ever admits that), an awesome quarrterback, has Super Bowl rings, rich, and dates a supermodel.
     
  10. D_Bob_Crotchitch

    D_Bob_Crotchitch New Member

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    We tend to want to be like men who have strengths and qualities that we are lacking. I know I'd like to be blah blah blah. Truthfully, I don't want to be like anybody else on this board. Bunch of wackos. :wink:
     
  11. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Yeah, mancrushes are very normal. Why do you think they put hung guys in straight porn? It's so you can imagine yourself plowing the pussy with that cock. It's all good.

    My first was as a freshman in boarding school. I really liked this one senior guy and it was a complete mindfuck. I had no idea these things happened to guys but a friend explained it to me as being normal. I wasn't in love with him so much as wanted to be around him and be like him. It was very intense.
     
  12. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    Yeah, that had occurred to me. I suppose the fact that my envy/man-crush centers around the guy being hung ... well ... makes me uneasy. Like you said, guys have troube admitting that Tom Brady is handsome. Can you imagine getting them to admit he has a bigger dick than them? :cool:
     
  13. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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  14. Jovial

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    When I was 19 I imagined the type of body I wanted and I worked to get that body. I do wish I could run as fast or jump as high as some athletes I see, but in day-to-day life I don't see many guys I would switch bodies with. I do wish I could see how other guys think and how they approach women, because having a good body alone doesn't guarantee attention from all women.
     
  15. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

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    Not really the desire to be another guy, but have the kind of life another guy have... I'm quite happy with my body and life, but it would be cool that in some ways I have the same life as another one, without all the worries I have now...
     
  16. killerb

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    when I was in elementary school, there was this really cool kid named Wade. I thought he was the coolest kid around & all the girls were in love with this guy...I used to wish I could be just like him & it turned out that he thought I was pretty cool too & we ended up becoming friends...

    however now that I've grown up, I realize that although some guys might SEEM to be near perfection, their reality can be totally different than what we can imagine from the outside...therefore I would never want to BE another guy...

    I might like to be as muscular as another guy, or as rich as another guy, or something to that effect, but I'd never want to BE that guy...
     
  17. FRE

    FRE
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    It's interesting that you sometimes wish that you were black. Prehaps that indicates how far we've advanced in racial attitudes, even though we still have a considerable distance to go.

    I'd have to agree that some black guys are really good looking.
     
  18. Slamdunk_dude

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    I think this is a very natural response which most men feel at some point in their life, just most aren't brave enough to admit it. I'm sure the majority of guys out there have experienced something like this, particularly in their teenage years.

    I remember in High School there was this one guy who was so exceptionally goodlooking that he got immense amounts of attention from everyone. He wasn't particularly athletic or academic but had a great personality and was immensely goodlooking. I remember varying between 2 extremes:

    1) I hated/envied him and wondered why I couldn't have an amazing body/be tall/supermodel-goodlooking like he was.

    2) I had almost an infatuation with him and wanted to be around him all the time, hoping that somehow some of him would "rub off" on me..how sad is that?

    I think I remember this so vividly as High School is such a hard time for some people and others seem to just cruise on through getting all the breaks..he was that guy.

    I actually bumped into him about 6 months ago and was delighted to find that he hadn't grown any more since high school and we were the same height, he'd put on a lot of weight and in general just looked very average. Seems like his glory days could be over...
     
  19. B_henry miller

    B_henry miller New Member

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    I grew up among many black people, so I think that this might have something to do with it. However, I also idolize white guys, Hispanics, all good looking guys.
     
  20. MovingForward

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    Sometimes I want to be a woman, but I have so much pleasure from my penis, that i doubt it would be worth it.
     
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