The Gay Delusion

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by thickseven, Oct 20, 2011.

  1. thickseven

    thickseven New Member

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    This is probably going to be somewhat inflammatory but would someone please explain all of the strange behavior by many of the homosexual members here (not that they are homosexual, that's a given)? What I'm referencing is the guys who say that they are straight and then looking for jerk off buddies or someone to blow and still maintaining that they are straight. WTF? There's nothing wrong with being gay, whatever floats your boat man, but what purpose does it serve to lie to yourself by saying that isn't homosexual behavior? Another thing that I find strange is the # of gay members implying that a lot of straight men are closeted gays or have gay tendencies. An example of which would be nudity in the locker room situations. I've been in a locker room where there was nudity, I didn't stare at the nude men and I didn't get naked in front of the other men. Reading some threads on here, it sounds like some people think that men who don't get naked are really just embarrassed about being gay, rather than not wanting to be seen naked out of modesty or (less understandably) not wanting to be ogled by gay guys. Another issue is the gay percentage system on LPSG but that's another matter entirely. . .
     
  2. jraz

    jraz New Member

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    They just don't want to admit it. Or they just think they are too much of a hotshot to be anything but straight. It's ego.
     
  3. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    I can't even begin to deal with the rigidity of your definition of "straight" because it's too late and I'm tired. You haven't been here long, and you're young. I suggest you continue to read the threads here with an open mind.

    But you came here, and it wasn't just because you had a huge dick [problem] or to meet chicks. Word.
     
    #3 B_Nick8, Oct 20, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 20, 2011
  4. sykray

    sykray Active Member

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    Firstly, I draw a distinction between same-sex activities and same-sex orientation. Doing something "gay" doesn't mean that either partner is gay, anymore than if a gay guy has sex with a woman it makes him straight (or even bisexual). So, some gay men are just as confused about thinking that gaysex= gay orientation as some straight men are.

    So, for me (and from my doctoral research) I see no contradiction if a soi-disant or self-styled straight man says that he wants to mastubate or have oral sex or even fuck with another man.

    Secondly. (also from my research), I do not regard sexual orientation labels as very helpful and they certainly are not mutually exclusive categories for most people - whatever they may claim. Humans (as with so many other species) are sexual and under the right circumstances can enjoy sexual activities (full stop) with either sex. The main reasons for not doing so are cultural, religious, societal, psychosocial injunctions and disapproval.

    Similar variables certainly play a part in determining how comfortable people are about nudity. Nudity for me is not particularly erotic or sexual, per se. It is only sexual or arousing if the general context is one where I can hope or expect some sexual act to occur.
     
  5. Masterbeight

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    It all starts with the question: When do you call yourself gay? Is it only for sexual reasons? Or for emotional reasons? Those are two different worlds.
    Some ideas and opinions about this subject can be found in the following thread:

    http://www.lpsg.org/268510-how-did-you-come-up.html
     
  6. buffaloboy

    buffaloboy Active Member

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    I agree with Sykray. I've had sex with women and sometimes fantasise about women but generally, to all intents and purposes, regard myself as gay. I'm open minded but certainly more sexually drawn to men than women. And just because I've engaged in sexual acts with women, doesn't make me a 'liar' when I refer to myself as 'gay'.
     
  7. dolfette

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    i'll confess to finding it a bit odd when a guy wants to suck or be sucked by other guys but still says he is straight and not bi.

    obviously if he digs sex with women too then he's not gay. something the OP seems to have missed.
     
  8. B_Nia88

    B_Nia88 New Member

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    what do you think of men who have sex with pre-op trans women, thickseven?
     
    #8 B_Nia88, Oct 20, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 20, 2011
  9. dolfette

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    i think they're open minded.
     
  10. jj27

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    thickseven, i think as several members have already mentioned your definition of straight and gay is pretty rigged and that's fine.

    I like a lot more people look at the difference today between some sex activities and same sex orientation or attraction. Many men who experiment with other men may do so just to have fun and get off rather than out of sheer attraction. Think of guys jacking off and watch porn versus guys in relationships who have sleepovers and cuddle. Many men view their orientation in this way and not your way.

    I'm not sure what your commentary about the locker room is all about, but if you are stating that there may be overt or veiled commentary by gay members that certain activities straight men engage in should be considered gay by their definition, isn't that exactly what you are posting about?
     
  11. thickseven

    thickseven New Member

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    Oh, well as to the rigidity in definiton, I use not wanting to do sexual acts with men as the benchmark for that, I realize there will be variations in what constitutes straight with different people. I was just struck by the (at least in my mind) contradiction between saying that your straight and then wanting to perform sexual acts with/on men. I don't think you can actualy qualify as straight if that's the case :/ bi-sexual or at least bi-curious maybe, but I think it does need a qualifier attached to it. I suppose the semantics is what bothers me about it mostly. As to the locker room thing there was one post someone had made somewhere in particular that I had in mind but I'm to lazy to dig it up :p
    As to the sex with pre-op trannies, I'd have to say that'd be homosexual behavior by definition, maybe not emotionally but obviously physically despite appearances two men would be engaged in intercourse. Even post-op I'd have to question it (not the orientation of the participants, but whether or not it counts as women on man) but I think that's because I'm a bit of a prude :p
     
    #11 thickseven, Oct 20, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 20, 2011
  12. durbantom

    durbantom Active Member

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    I find it curious that people worry about changing in front of people in a locker room, but are quite happy to put a picture of their erect penis on the WORLD WIDE web.
     
  13. thickseven

    thickseven New Member

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    I was going to respond to this last bit but I don't understand what your getting at. . . it was meant as anecdotal evidence. . .

    "Have visited LA Fitness - not for me - too many women and kids. Also the "men" there are too closeted. "
    From a gay poster in another thread, this confuses me a bit, is he implying that the men are less manly because they aren't being openly gay (or less self assured/honest with themselves) or that the guys who fancy themselves as manly are really gay? Either way I think there's something problematic with the logic of the statement. The implication is sorta that he thinks he can tell when someone is gay simply by virtue of there locker room behavior, which i find kinda :confused:. I realize this statement might not be indicitave of the gay population as a whole (how could it be?) but again, just anecdotal evidence.
     
  14. thickseven

    thickseven New Member

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    Well it's a little apples to oranges in my eyes (lol I sound like Hermain Cain). I'm not physically in front of any of the members being looked at closely. I have anonymity on the web that isn't afforded me irl. I don't think it's curious when considered from that angle.
     
  15. Endued

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    There are indeed an awful lot of people here afraid of calling themselves bisexual.
     
  16. D_Johnson Withernads

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    I don't think there is much chance of explaining it. If you're excited by the thought of carrying out a sexual act with someone of the same sex then in my opinion that would make you bi at least. It seems with anonymity that people will talk about and look for their titillation more than they might otherwise, but they still won't accept it for what it is. Maybe they're scared of being labelled? I think people make far too much of an issue about all this myself, but a lot of our society seems to like pigeon-holing people into their little categories. Personally I consider myself to be bi as I fantasise about guys just as much as girls, but I've only ever indulged my bi side once. Had it been a better experience I'd likely be enjoying myself on both sides of the fence... But to call myself straight because I only sleep with women, well I'd just be lying to myself.
     
  17. houtx48

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    The locker room thing will baffle me until the end of time, what makes anyone think they are so special that everyone wants to look at them, fat, skinny, tall, short, we pretty all much have the same basic equipment. I do love a good towel dance though, putting on your underwear before you take the towel off.
     
  18. dolfette

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    it's rather childish to mock a man just for not wanting to be seen naked. why the hell is it such a big deal to some of you that they want to stay within their comfort zone?
    that you're paying enough attention to them to even notice the 'towel dance' makes me think their discomfort is justified.
    honestly, you think you're better than them just because you flop it out and thy don't? childish!
     
  19. thickseven

    thickseven New Member

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    ^^ This is exactly what I've been trying to get at.
     
  20. wolf1bear2

    wolf1bear2 Member

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    The "towel dance" is wickedly funny...
     
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