- Joined
- Dec 21, 2005
- Posts
- 1,076
- Media
- 1
- Likes
- 12
- Points
- 183
- Location
- charleston, south carolina
- Sexuality
- 100% Straight, 0% Gay
- Gender
- Male
So I gotta know, why are women irritated by sports? Is it the noise? The whistles? The drunk boyfriend (and possibly his friends)? The excessively loud TV? Or the way that any male must be kept away from a TV set on Saturday and Sunday? And in extreme cases (like mine), 4/7 weekdays depending on the time of year?
Ladies, you must understand, it's our release. In a society that frowns upon blatent masculinity and straight up letting your nuts hang, we need a place to be obnoxious males. That's where hunting, fighting, and fucking you in a standing up version of the missionary position known as "suspended congress" or "stand and walk", come into play. (especially the standing up fucking part)
Sports are like our Grey's Anatomy, our CSI, our ( insert soap opera or primetime show here). And sports news like SportsCenter(dadada-dadada) are our version of Oprah or Dr. Phil.
You must understand ladies, we WILL compromise with you. Next time we're fully immersed in triple overtime at the Staples Center between the Lakers and Suns, don't intentionally heave the figurative shit at the fan. How bout have a seat next to us and ask us to explain. Hell, even root for the other team, makes it more exciting. Or just say, I wanna watch _____ when this (game,match) is over. That way, you will actually be able to peacefully get us from in front of Monday Night Football, with no fuss. That way, we won't give a damn about missing the game ( or at least, we'll out on that facade,haha ).
Just don't let it eat at you day after day, week after week, and then explode when it's 4th & 8 on the oppositions 30 yard line with 23 seconds left in the game. That shit ain't gonna cut it. Besides, all that stress isn't good for your health. And we (at least us decent fellas) don't like it when yall feel bad.
How do the oh so very fine women of LPSG feel about sports?
Ladies, you must understand, it's our release. In a society that frowns upon blatent masculinity and straight up letting your nuts hang, we need a place to be obnoxious males. That's where hunting, fighting, and fucking you in a standing up version of the missionary position known as "suspended congress" or "stand and walk", come into play. (especially the standing up fucking part)
Sports are like our Grey's Anatomy, our CSI, our ( insert soap opera or primetime show here). And sports news like SportsCenter(dadada-dadada) are our version of Oprah or Dr. Phil.
You must understand ladies, we WILL compromise with you. Next time we're fully immersed in triple overtime at the Staples Center between the Lakers and Suns, don't intentionally heave the figurative shit at the fan. How bout have a seat next to us and ask us to explain. Hell, even root for the other team, makes it more exciting. Or just say, I wanna watch _____ when this (game,match) is over. That way, you will actually be able to peacefully get us from in front of Monday Night Football, with no fuss. That way, we won't give a damn about missing the game ( or at least, we'll out on that facade,haha ).
Just don't let it eat at you day after day, week after week, and then explode when it's 4th & 8 on the oppositions 30 yard line with 23 seconds left in the game. That shit ain't gonna cut it. Besides, all that stress isn't good for your health. And we (at least us decent fellas) don't like it when yall feel bad.
How do the oh so very fine women of LPSG feel about sports?