The Life Of A Loner

BigBadWolf84

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Being the guy who keeps to himself is pretty awesome. Never getting caught in the web or in the crossfire of problems. Walking your own path in life....with your own ideas and beliefs....not being part of a crowd or hive.....it's like watching from the outside. Then there's the people who think it's a bad thing, saying things like "that guy shouldn't be eating alone in the restaurant" or something like that. SMH
 

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Nothing wrong with being a loner by choice, as long as you’re good company for yourself. And as long as you’re not hiding from relationships.

I tend to be alone a lot of the time, go to movies alone, eat out alone if I choose, but I don’t hide from relationships. I also have lots of friends. I am great company with or without them. I’m never lonely.
 

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I have an enormously huge family, tons of work associates and the occasional relationship. Yet I do spend a good quantity of my time alone. 80% of the reason being that I enjoy it . I like to think that though it is a choice I make, I can make the same choice to stop when I want.

I agree with Miss LaFemme , I never feel lonely
 

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I would identify as a loner. My loneliness is not really by choice but also is in that it's the most comfortable bad habit for me to fall back on. I live the life of a loner by going to see movies, going for hikes and exercising, going to the library, doing crosswords- all things that can be done alone and for cheap. It's fine, it's comfortable, but I also know myself and that there are many times when I would prefer having some company. Having close, personal friends is a luxury I am currently without but I am always working towards making connections with people.

I respect anyone's choice to live a more solitary life, this is just my take. I remember going to see a movie once in a big city on a day when I had nowhere to be and nothing to do. It was some sort of early matinee..11:30 or noon.. and I assumed I would be the only person in there. There were actually some patrons scattered around the theatre when I first sat down and then a few more people trickled in. As the film started I looked around and realized every person in there was a middle-aged single man with some sort of bag. And there was me in my late twenties, my backpack in the seat next to me, and I made a note to myself not to never end up like that. They may have been perfectly happy guys but I am working towards having more people in my life, not less.

Food-wise I like to eat out and try different cuisines but I prefer eating at specific casual places where my singleness isn't as amplified as it would be at a fancier sit-down restaurant. Taco stands are my jam, Vietnamese banh mi shops, empty Indian restaurants, Peruvian cafes just to name a few. Going to bars alone is iffy for me- if I was more capable at flirting or striking up random conversations I would probably feel different than I typically do which is somewhat awkward and gratuitous (I'm not really a big drinker).
 

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I prefer being alone. It is pretty nice most of the time. I do sometimes want a girlfriend though. For example I went to the movies recently and would have liked to have had someone there to hold. But beyond those moments, being alone is my preferred state.
 

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Nothing wrong with being a loner by choice, as long as you’re good company for yourself. And as long as you’re not hiding from relationships.

I tend to be alone a lot of the time, go to movies alone, eat out alone if I choose, but I don’t hide from relationships. I also have lots of friends. I am great company with or without them. I’m never lonely.
Pretty much the same with me. My family (especially my mom) hates that about me and always wished I spent more time with company. It's frustrating to the point where I have to tell folks "leave me alone" or "fuck off"
 
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Do any of you think being a loner would be possible without having friends? A few of you said you had friends...is that a quick outlet when you need some one to talk to or hang out with? Could you see yourself in the same mindset if there was never anyone else? No friends. No coworkers that wanted to talk to you. Family doesnt talk to you. Etc etc...
 
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BigBadWolf84

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Do any of you think being a loner would be possible without having friends? A few of you said you had friends...is that a quick outlet when you need some one to talk to or hang out with? Could you see yourself in the same mindset if there was never anyone else? No friends. No coworkers that wanted to talk to you. Family doesnt talk to you. Etc etc...
Ehh it wouldn't really bother me if I were truly alone. Nowadays it's about survival to me. Humanity grows worse every minute, and my need for having my own space grows. If a person I loved spending time with goes away, it's like "hey Life, thanks for letting me savor that but I gotta go back to doing what I do."
 
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Maybe someone tried to make you act the way they wanted you to, or they way, they thought was better, according to their standards. Anyway, spending some quality time with yourself is not bad at all. However, saying that humanity is changing for the worse, sounds rather general. Pls dont get me wrong, I'm not judging, I am only saying that there are always good things around us, without implying the company of others necessarily. Just random stuff. We just have to keep an open eye and a positive way of thinking. :cool:
 

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The 70% extroverted majority in the West holds quite a bit a bias against the 30% introverted minority. The term "loner" itself is a pejorative term. Lone wolf adds a sinister aspect. Eccentric, misanthrope, asocial, anti-social, oddball, wallflower, recluse, cold fish--there's no end to the negative bias.
 
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Do any of you think being a loner would be possible without having friends? A few of you said you had friends...is that a quick outlet when you need some one to talk to or hang out with? Could you see yourself in the same mindset if there was never anyone else? No friends. No coworkers that wanted to talk to you. Family doesnt talk to you. Etc etc...


Absolutely, I'd still be a hardcore introvert who likes/loves/needs to be alone (a lot of the time). The way I see it, extroverts gather their energy from their surroundings. They absorb the good vibes of people around them and need a lot of social interaction.

Introverts OTOH make their own energy and rather than taking it from others give it in social contact. Meaning, they often find most social interaction exhausting and need time to recharge

If I didn't have my small group of friends or remaining family, I'd still need tons of alone time to recharge, be alone, reflect and rejuvenate. I don't even interact with THAT many people at work, but the little bit that I do, consistently has me coming home grateful for the blissful peace and quiet.

Plus, I love dining out and shopping alone! It can be preferable to going out with others.
 
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EllieP

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My Mum said it, my best friend said it, and my husband said it: if I had no one to talk to for an extended period of time I'd either explode or talk to ducks. I'd prefer dogs or cats, but I can see ducks.

I guess I'm sort of the opposite of a loner. I'm probably a loner's worst nightmare! And I apologize in advance if I happen to invade your sanctuary in the future. I come in peace and mean no harm.

But I respect people's personal space and would never intrude if asked not to.

I readily admit that I draw my energy from an audience. If it's a low energy crowd I tend to be more subdued.

When I used to travel a lot more alone I learned to dine on my own. But then I discovered eating in the bar. I apologize to all bartenders whose conversations I monopolized.
 

BigBadWolf84

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Maybe someone tried to make you act the way they wanted you to, or they way, they thought was better, according to their standards. Anyway, spending some quality time with yourself is not bad at all. However, saying that humanity is changing for the worse, sounds rather general. Pls dont get me wrong, I'm not judging, I am only saying that there are always good things around us, without implying the company of others necessarily. Just random stuff. We just have to keep an open eye and a positive way of thinking. :cool:
I understand what you mean, brother. It's just that I feel like I'm surviving rather than living. I'm only holding on barely to what's good.
 

BigBadWolf84

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My Mum said it, my best friend said it, and my husband said it: if I had no one to talk to for an extended period of time I'd either explode or talk to ducks. I'd prefer dogs or cats, but I can see ducks.

I guess I'm sort of the opposite of a loner. I'm probably a loner's worst nightmare! And I apologize in advance if I happen to invade your sanctuary in the future. I come in peace and mean no harm.

But I respect people's personal space and would never intrude if asked not to.

I readily admit that I draw my energy from an audience. If it's a low energy crowd I tend to be more subdued.

When I used to travel a lot more alone I learned to dine on my own. But then I discovered eating in the bar. I apologize to all bartenders whose conversations I monopolized.
I've spoken with you before, I think? Lol I know you come in peace.
 
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It's majestic to find peace and be alone. I'm an introvert by choice, but too much in my opinion can also be detrimental on the emotional psyche. Typing into anxiety and depression is no joke, not to mention the thought or the possibility of acquiring a schizophrenic trait can develop.

I rather be alone, but being outgoing has its perks, a good laugh or smile can be soothing to the soul. I generally keep to myself, unless when out in public. People gravitate towards the good vibes, and lifelong friends are developed this way.