The perfect "first" date

[average_d]

Hey girls,

I'm a 20 year old college kid, and asked this girl out today, to see if she wanted to go out on a date next week. We've been talking for a little while, flirtatious stuff, and there's chemistry between as (as we have mutual friends and have partied together before--it's always flirtatious conversation, back and forth).

So, with that said, was just wondering what a "perfect" first date would be. How do I impress her, but at the same time, not scare her away from trying to hard. A simple drink at a pub? OR a casual dinner someplace or other.

It's probably a silly question, but oh well.. don't reem me out for it!

 

[D_Ebensneezer_Spooge]

since you've already seen her at parties, go for the opposite on the first date....casual dinner

 

[SweetLovesVick]

Not a silly question at all. I am impressed you asked here at LPSG.
You should pick her up for the date at her place, and bring her flowers! Then take her out for a casual dinner where you can sit and get to know each other better while you eat. Talk about things that interest you and she if perhaps she enjoys the same. Find out what her interest are and what she is studying.
If you still feel that chemistry before you leave the restaurant ask her if she would be interested in a second date. That way you can guage her interest in you. If she says yes for the second date you can plan a kiss when you take her home. Always walk her to her door! If you act respectable and are a gentleman she will want to go out with you again. Show her you are different then every other college guy!

 

[tgirlsrgreat]

listen to the ladies! i don't know about the flower on a first date though(all due respect to ms. sweet) that might be a bit much, and seem a bit cloying. i totally agree with everything else. then again the flowers may totally blow her away!!

 

[tgirlsrgreat]

for this thread, please disregard that i appear to be a guy wearing a skirt. you would be amazed at how many people get fooled by that.:tongue:

 

[Bob Ross]

Take her to a restaurant first and make sure you talk about the weather constantly, don't let her make any decisions for herself (make sure you order both meals) and when you do let her speak make sure to always let her know what your mother would say...

Then (in keeping with your avatar) take her out ice skating and show her how strong you are by checking her blindside a la Matt Cooke.

Seriously though, I agree with tgirl; no flowers, its too much for a college-age date. You say you know her (run with the same crowd)? Do you have a mutual interest that you can build off of (e.g. sports, art, movies, music, etc. etc.)? The best thing to do is go from there that way its common ground and you will both have something to talk about. And also, don't let yourself be too eager to impress her. It should be a mutual thing. If you make her feel like you are crazy about her from day one it may cause trouble...

 

[B_subgirrl]

If you ask 100 women what their perfect first date would be, you will probably get 100 different answers. Having said that, I think taking her out to dinner is a great option. Personally, I hate flowers, but even as a teenager I would have thought that a guy who brought me flowers was really sweet. You should go intending to pay for her, but if she insists on paying for herself, let her (only after a bit of argument)! Some women feel it's important to pay their share. Hope you have a lovely time.

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

A two-part daytime date can be fun. Begin with drinks, even at a coffee or tea cafe, and have a relaxed chat where you can shake off the early nerves. Then walk to a nearby restaurant and have lunch or an early dinner, so there's plenty of time to talk without the staff trying to turn the table for the dinner rush. After the meal, you can part ways or continue the walk/talk for a bit longer.

Very low-key, but good for dates where it turns out there's a deep connection.

Also, I think flowers can work. My dates bring a gift, and flowers or a book are easy and always appreciated. But, I'm a flower and book kind of girl :08:, so, if you want to give her a little something, go with whatever thoughtful item you think she would enjoy.

 

[HiddenLacey]

Flowers are great, but could be alittle much for the first date. I would much rather go somewhere casual, but I personally hate bars and pubs.

You could also make a plan to do something simple after dinner, take a walk somewhere, lake, beach, etc if it's not to cold there already. You could go do something you find out you both like or you could ask her what she wants to do after dinner (but have something in mind in case she says it doesn't matter.) Ideas are movies, putt-putt, play pool, dancing etc.

Have fun!

 

[ugb]

Flowers on the first date? You're sending this guy to friendzone before it even starts

 

[Chantillylace]

I can agree that there will be a million and one answers to this thread. Opponion based questions usually do, that being said.


Dinner sounds like a good plan! Maybe slightly earlier so that there is still time to do something afterward (movie, drinks, take a walk in a park) I didn't happen to check where you are before posting but usually towns with universities have all sorts of options.
As far as what to talk about, just be yourself. If you two have more in common than a groin ache, I'm sure the banter will turn in to more in depth "getting to know eachother" talk. I can't stress enough how important it is to just be yourself. I guess since I'm in Vegas, the guys tend to try and impress.. but there is nothing sexier than a coinfident man with intelligence. (oh and sense of humor, also)
And if I may lend some experience on the flowers...
I used to think that I would love flowers given to me on a fist date turns out I don't. I still appreciated them, but found that it made the guy I was on the date with seem too eager. He ended up in the friend zone after 3 dates.
I reccomend flowers later, perhaps after you know her favorite kind, or if she is allergic.

Have fun..

 

[shr1125]

If you two have more in common than a groin ache, I'm sure the banter will turn in to more in depth "getting to know eachother" talk.

Good advice.

I like the idea of an early(ish) dinner to allow for more "get to know you" time at a local park. Even walking around a pedestrian-friendly downtown area is a good, non-threatening place to get to know someone. I always used to like to take first dates to a casual dinner then, if the weather was nice, walk someplace nearby to get an ice cream cone. That way, we're in a different setting with (hopefully) new conversation starters all around us. I'd stay away from flowers. Like Chantillylace suggested, wait until you know her favorite kind then either 1) pick them yourself if possible or 2) get a simple arrangement for her. (Make sure you buy a vase for her too. I don't know many college students (men or women) that own a vase.)

Unfortunately, if it turns out that the only thing the two of you have in common is a groin ache, then the whole "get to know you" think is going to be pretty boring. Trying to force conversation with someone that you've nothing in common with is certainly tough.

Have fun, be yourself, practice active listening, and let the conversation be about her.

 

[average_d]

Thanks for the replies everyone!

I really appreciate all the advice!

It's hard to verify a "perfect" first date, but you gals had good ideas. My original plan was to take her out to a casual dinner, at a pub-type restaurant/bar. I just wanted to hear all of your suggestions... and no flowers lol, I've done that once to be romantic, and it didn't turn out too well.

We are friends already, we've known each other for a little over a year, and we've always had chemistry... so, we're going to see if it could go any further.

We're both attracted to each other, and she has mentioned stuff about sex before. She'll casually bring up discussions on past hook-ups and stuff like that; so I'm not sure if it'd be smart to make a move on the first date... well, I guess it all depends on the situation LOL

I just want to give her a good time, and try to be a gentleman!

Enough of me rambling though.

Again, I really appreciate the responses you gave me! I was worried at first that putting this up may get me a little bit of scrutiny (seeing as everyone [dudes] just talk about their dicks all the time).

Thanks again!

cheers

 

[molotovmuffin]

Think long term. Don't do anything that you aren't willing to repeat down the road. I like the flowers and dinner. After dinner a walk along the beach/park/river front. Keep it simple and see where it goes.

With luck...you can do the same thing on your 20th wedding anniversary :wink:

 

[D_Fiona_Farvel]

Flowers on the first date? You're sending this guy to friendzone before it even starts

Can't speak for other ladies, but I always receive a gift on a date and flowers - lilies for those taking notes - are a fave that earn plus points (for the guy and his parents). Certainly, not all women enjoy flowers, but they are no guaranteed path to the "friendzone", as there are women like myself who find such gestures a turn on.

Think long term. Don't do anything that you aren't willing to repeat down the road. I like the flowers and dinner. After dinner a walk along the beach/park/river front. Keep it simple and see where it goes.

With luck...you can do the same thing on your 20th wedding anniversary :wink:

:grinning-smiley-003 Agreed.

 

[HazelGod]

Taco Bell and a handjob, followed by an insincere promise to call later.

 

[D_Reuben Stallpisser]

Maybe a movie and late dinner. That would give your something to talk about over food in case things are a little awkward. Flowers would be a mistake, probably.

 

[Patchos]

A good gagging and facial should impress!

 

[tgirlsrgreat]

opcorn:let the games begin!!

 

[basincreek]

Once again Patchos makes me LOL.


I have nothing to add here except that if another guy tries to pick her up halfway through the date you should probably do something about it. I didn't when that happened and the gal left with the dude when I was in the bathroom.

Have you considered an unconventional date like a picnic somewhere pretty?