THE PERILS OF PAULINE CHAPTER ONE: Mr. Big In which we are introduced to the evil genius of the piece and a little more of the story is revealed to us. Part One. Kyle Pinter was nervous, and who wouldn't be when faced with the prospect of meeting one of the most notorious criminal masterminds on both sides of the Atlantic. He sat clutching his thin briefcase in the soulless white marble hallway. A number of arched doorways could be seen spreading off it, but nobody ever came or went. Up until recently, yesterday morning in fact, he had been a trusted if junior member of a small British pharmaceutical company. He looked the part, gangly, lifeless ginger hair, and the essential thick glasses. Ever now, he was dressed in a second rate Marks and Spencers suit. He looked at his watch for perhaps the hundredth time and signed. He could almost feel his knees begin to shake. He wasn't a gambler, had never even bought a bingo card, but here he was willing to risk it all and take a chance for the big time. "The Big Time" - a smile came fleetingly to his lips as this phase passed through his troubled mind. 'You're braver than I thought. Not many people smile before meeting Mr. Big.' A sassy womans voice broke through his reverie. He looked up to see a woman of about 5 foot 7, skin the colour of the richest cocoa chocolate. Her face reminded him of the pop star Jamelia whose picture he had masturbated over on some cold lonely nights, but slightly broader more animalistic. Her dark mane of dark hair in the classic Farah Fawcett style enhanced this. Her backside was large, perhaps too large, but it was matched by an equally large set of bosoms. And all this encased in a tiny stars 'n' stripes American flag bikini, which seemed to exist to Kyle's mind only to give a lover something to remove. 'My name is Ebony St. Claire" she said bending to shake his hand, revealing at the same time a crevice as deep as Kyles fear if not deeper. 'And before you ask, no that's not my real name". Without waiting, she dropped his hand and started walking back along the corridor, her almost unbroken display of dark skin in direct contrast with the white marble walls. Kyle followed silently, his eyes fixated on Ebonys swinging hips. This was one flag he was finding that he was already saluting. How he longed to peel away the tiny inconsequential panties...To slip his fingers into that moist... Such thoughts were broken from his mind as Ebony announced "Mr Big. Kyle Pinter. Kyle Pinter. Mr Big". Kyle looked around him bewilderedly. He had been so enamoured with Ebony's swimsuit and what it contained (or rather barely contained) that he hadn't noticed that they were now standing by a Roman style swimming pool, the marble theme extending out even to here, dotted by a few faux-statutes. Kyle noticed however, that these stone gods seemed to be rather better endowed than those of ancient Rome, both the men and women. Reclining in a deck chair was a man who was obviously Mr. Big. He was dressed in a white dressing gown and seemed to be if anything a retired porn star, his jet-black hair streaked with a shock of white. He was dressed in a white dressing gown, pulled back to reveal some lightly muscled tanned shoulders which were being massaged by a women Kyle would have sworn was Linda Evangalista except for the short spunky hair cut and scar under her left eye. She too was dressed in a fairly inconsequential silver bandeau bikini. So tell me Kyle what brings you here, asked Mr. Big in a strange hybrid trans-Atlantic drawl. Ebony tells me, you have some interesting news. Kyle gulped nervously. Ebony stared at him with green large eyes. As he stared back he began to speak. I can make you rich, if you think your rich now, think again. Kyle couldnt believe this. These words were far too bold to be his words. Get to the point Mr Big interrupted, a hint of aggression in his voice, cutting down Kyle's new found confindence. Ok, then, Kyle continued All through history, man has been obsessed with one thing above all else. The size of his manhood. Bigger is better. My company seems to have found a way to increase penis size to almost any extent. No side effects, all-natural. Bullshit ejected Mr. Big again. 'Sounds like a load of old Spam'. Let him continue, said Ebony her eyes now full of interest. A research group recently came back from the Amazon, bringing with them a container of something which when taken orally causes your penis to grow. Im not sure to what extent. However, its all very hush. hush. Wheres your proof? asked Ebony, leaning forwards in interest, giving Kyle another eyeful of her wares. Here is the problem, as I speak there seems to be only a miniscule amount left in civilization Kyle said It will be delivered to the Sadah Cosmetics Corporation in two days from now. So wheres the rest the blonde spoke for the first time, her voice smoky and husky. Thats were your proof comes into it Kyle said. I consumed you see, the substance, it looks if you will like bees wax. If you look at these photos in my briefcase you will see my growth. He handed over the briefcase to Mr. Big who casually opened it. Inside, where some old snapshots of Kyle naked obviously taken some time in the past in which he was getting out a bath. A small penis hung from between his legs. Mr. Big smirked. However, the next and more recent photos showed a remarkable difference. Here was a Kyle hanging low and wide. Mr Big stared at Ebony. This obviously needs more investigation. For now Kyle, relax while Ebony gives you a backrub. Youll find the stuff around the corner. He then went back to looking at the photos and the various documents that the briefcase contained. Come with me Ebony said cocking a finger at Kyle. Ill certainly try he stammered following. Part Two of Chapter One coming shortly in which the true extent of Kyle's endowment is revealed as well as various other things. However, if Pauline will appear is as yet, unknown.