The problem with LPSG

[deleted105034]

Does it seem like there is a lot of negativity around here?

It's because a lot of very different people have been brought together by a seemingly random physical attribute. There's no correlation between penis size and race, IQ, career choice (other than sex-workers), culture, and definitely not personality!

It's only natural that there will be a lot of rubbing the wrong way (no pun intended). In a way it's good thing though, helping us all to get along. Maybe LPSG can is like a microcosm of our twisted little planet!

 

[Belly_Dancer]

There is negativity everywhere, and it thrives or dies depending on how well it is fed. I choose not to feed negativity in my own thoughts, in my relationships, in my workplace, or here. Yes, we all have our moments, but to have a bright future, we must encourage positivity & originality, and let small-mindedness and negative threads die of neglect.

 

[invisibleman]

Does it seem like there is a lot of negativity around here?

It's because a lot of very different people have been brought together by a seemingly random physical attribute. There's no correlation between penis size and race, IQ, career choice (other than sex-workers), culture, and definitely not personality!

It's only natural that there will be a lot of rubbing the wrong way (no pun intended). In a way it's good thing though, helping us all to get along. Maybe LPSG can is like a microcosm of our twisted little planet!

I understand what you are saying. Negative media imitates negative media. There is a lot of adverse things happening in the news...you have a lot of schadenfreude in "reality" shows.

I think that mode of thinking is infectious and habit forming. If people want a positive side of media...the people have to be positive. They have to want to be positive. I think that we could have a better focus on positive things...whatever those positive things may be.

I don't bother listening to the news. Sometimes, I think that there is TOO much info out there.

So, if you don't like a lot of negativity in your life...do something positive for someone else or for yourself.

 

[DaveGoodie]

There is a fair bit. the bits I have problems with are:
"this was discussed in a thread four years ago, don't bring it up again",
"we shouldn't discuss minors on the site", and
"X is a fake/he's lying".

Dave

 

[SpoiledPrincess]

There is a lot of negativity here, but there's a lot of negativity in society in general, however among a group of friends people are less likely to air their negativity as everyone will call them a grumpy bugger, on the net if you're being negative there's no one who impinges on your real life so people don't care as much.

 

[jeff black]

There is a fair bit. the bits I have problems with are:
"this was discussed in a thread four years ago, don't bring it up again",
"we shouldn't discuss minors on the site", and
"X is a fake/he's lying".

Dave

Dave, may I ask you a question?

What is your problem with the site not discussing minors. I mean, we have threads on penis size at various ages, we have discussed "the first time you..." The only thing people tend to frown upon here on a regular basis is threads or comments like:

I'm 16 and my 10 inch cock leaks alot of precum, here's pictures.

OR

I'm a 38 year old man/woman and I really love it when my neighbours 13 year old son stands naked in the sun and let's me perform sexual favours on him.

I think it is fair that the site doesn't tolerate things like that.

In regards to your first point, I don't like it when people say things like that either. However, there are people here who start a thread about how to wear a condom when you are uncut. Had they used the search function, they would have found the exact same thread was created and responded to two weeks ago. It's frustrating to people when they actually take the time to respond to a question, only to have a brand new thread created, asking the EXACT same thing. This is why you will see posters posting links to older threads. Some of them just link, others get a bit disgruntled and post harsh comments.

AS FOR NEGATIVITY, yes... there really is a lot. However, it seems to be coming from a few particular people. Remove the people, and you remove the problem. I would like to say this though ( if anyone is still reading my post) It seems like things are getting better. People have stopped being intentionally rude to each other. One or two people who I was originally disgusted with, have actually turned into decent posters. It's really nice to see.

Point is, I think the negativity will subside.

 

[Ethyl]

As a good friend recently said: Life is a story.

So if you don't like your story, change it.

 

[Drifterwood]

Dave, may I ask you a question?

What is your problem with the site not discussing minors. I mean, we have threads on penis size at various ages, we have discussed "the first time you..." The only thing people tend to frown upon here on a regular basis is threads or comments like:

I'm 16 and my 10 inch cock leaks alot of precum, here's pictures.

OR

I'm a 38 year old man/woman and I really love it when my neighbours 13 year old son stands naked in the sun and let's me perform sexual favours on him.

I think it is fair that the site doesn't tolerate things like that.

In regards to your first point, I don't like it when people say things like that either. However, there are people here who start a thread about how to wear a condom when you are uncut. Had they used the search function, they would have found the exact same thread was created and responded to two weeks ago. It's frustrating to people when they actually take the time to respond to a question, only to have a brand new thread created, asking the EXACT same thing. This is why you will see posters posting links to older threads. Some of them just link, others get a bit disgruntled and post harsh comments.

AS FOR NEGATIVITY, yes... there really is a lot. However, it seems to be coming from a few particular people. Remove the people, and you remove the problem. I would like to say this though ( if anyone is still reading my post)

I got this far.

 

[B_ScaredLittleBoy]

It depends on perspective. I don't see a lot of negativity here. But then I am selective about which threads I read and I steer away from what I don't like. So to me, perceived 'negativity' at LPSG is not a problem. :smile:

If there is sufficient evidence, fakers should be outed. I don't agree with randomly calling people fakes and liars on a whim though. Again, I don't see much of that.

 

[Eva]

I've only been here a week or so but I've been on various message boards as a poster, admin, and/or owner for the last... um, for a lot of years. :wink: As far as negativity goes, I think LPSG is on the very tame side of negativity.

Perhaps this is because I'm choosy about my threads? I don't go into each and every thread. And what negativity I have seen here tends to be handled in a pretty cool manner--everyone comes right out with it and people seem to argue respectfully by message board standards.

You're going to find negativity everywhere, especially on boards where people have the opportunity to be an asswipe and maintain a degree of anonymity. Most of the time, said asswipery is only to get some form of attention. Usually, if you ignore the jackasses, they disappear.

 

[arliss]

LPSG is fine....of course there is negativity...you have over 20,000 strangers on a board...none of whom know each other..and each trying to make a point..of course you will have negativity..put this into perspective....

 

[camper joe]

I seriously doubt that whenever you get this many people together, and all are trying to make a point, that everyone is going to agree with each other. I respect each one opinion as I hope they respect mine, knowing that we are not going to see eye to eye on everything. :smile:

 

[mindseye]

In regards to your first point, I don't like it when people say things like that either. However, there are people here who start a thread about how to wear a condom when you are uncut. Had they used the search function, they would have found the exact same thread was created and responded to two weeks ago. It's frustrating to people when they actually take the time to respond to a question, only to have a brand new thread created, asking the EXACT same thing. This is why you will see posters posting links to older threads. Some of them just link, others get a bit disgruntled and post harsh comments.

I'd like to add to these remarks a bit with an analogy to a real-life situation I encounter a lot. How many of you at some point in your life offered an excuse to a teacher to get an extension on a deadline?

• "My alarm didn't go off."
• "I was sick."
• "My grandma died."
• "My computer crashed."
• "I thought you said Wednesday."
• "My roommate's loud partying distracted me all night."
• "I went to the library at 4am to get started, and they were closed!"
• "I left my book at my parent's house over the weekend, and they're sending it back to me but it hasn't gotten here yet."
• "My printer ran out of ink."
• (After 10+ years in the business, I've never actually gotten "My dog ate it.")

Each of these excuses are old to me. Some of them, very old. Yet to the first-semester student who no longer has their parents looking after them to make sure they keep up with their responsibilities, the experience of falling through the cracks and trying to wriggle back out is new. So, as part of my job, I have to deal with some incredibly repetitive excuses.

For the kids on here who are just discovering their sexuality -- and a lot of people still are at 18 -- these questions are new to them, and they may not haven't been thinking about sexuality long enough for it to occur to them that everyone else goes through these same questions, too. (I remember the "cloud" I sat on for a week after I discovered masturbation before I discovered just how common it was to do so. I thought I was onto something big! Woooo!)

I urge people to respond to FAQs of a personal nature ("What are these little white bumps?", "If I only did it once, does that make me gay?", etc.) more compassionately, even if other LPSG members have asked these questions before. For FAQs of an impersonal nature ("Does anyone have nude pictures of that hot guy from Lost?"), feel free to point out the wonders of Google.

 

[ClaireTalon]

I wouldn't worry too much about the negativity here. Although the overall subject of the board suggests widely homogenous insights, it doesn't factor in peoples' believes, political and general views and tolerance. So from time to time, a little hassle ensues. But so far, all of these have been cleared, if not else, through brute force (temporary and permanent bans).

The subject of repeating threads is a stronger one, I think. I find so many repeating threats, one of the reasons why my posting has dropped. In the early days of my presence here, I used to post four, five or more contributions per session, meanwhile I'm happy if I find two threads to post. One doesn't want to tell the same story over and over. But that's a pointless discussion, you would have to change the minds of board newbies to steer clear of that.

An interesting annotation on that. Before I joined, I used to spend a lot of guest time here. Guests then were not enabled to use the search function, neither completely free, nor protected through a code entry. One should expect that now, as the search function is there for members and guests, there should be less repeating, one-time-posting and stuff. It's interesting that this problem still exists.

And in the end, my take on faking. Probably that's the subject most pointless to be discussed, see further up my post: The only way to work it out would be altering some minds. Since we can't do that, we can only use our own reason to sort out posts that are obviously fantasies, however sick. And leave it to the moderators to take adequate steps.

 

[viking1]

I'd like to add to these remarks a bit with an analogy to a real-life situation I encounter a lot. How many of you at some point in your life offered an excuse to a teacher to get an extension on a deadline?

• "My alarm didn't go off."
• "I was sick."
• "My grandma died."
• "My computer crashed."
• "I thought you said Wednesday."
• "My roommate's loud partying distracted me all night."
• "I went to the library at 4am to get started, and they were closed!"
• "I left my book at my parent's house over the weekend, and they're sending it back to me but it hasn't gotten here yet."
• "My printer ran out of ink."
• (After 10+ years in the business, I've never actually gotten "My dog ate it.")

Each of these excuses are old to me. Some of them, very old. Yet to the first-semester student who no longer has their parents looking after them to make sure they keep up with their responsibilities, the experience of falling through the cracks and trying to wriggle back out is new. So, as part of my job, I have to deal with some incredibly repetitive excuses.

For the kids on here who are just discovering their sexuality -- and a lot of people still are at 18 -- these questions are new to them, and they may not haven't been thinking about sexuality long enough for it to occur to them that everyone else goes through these same questions, too. (I remember the "cloud" I sat on for a week after I discovered masturbation before I discovered just how common it was to do so. I thought I was onto something big! Woooo!)

I urge people to respond to FAQs of a personal nature ("What are these little white bumps?", "If I only did it once, does that make me gay?", etc.) more compassionately, even if other LPSG members have asked these questions before. For FAQs of an impersonal nature ("Does anyone have nude pictures of that hot guy from Lost?"), feel free to point out the wonders of Google.

I agree completely. Unless someone is being an outright troll, they deserve respect and compassion.

 

[benderten2001]

mindseye hit upon a thought I believe is worth reiterating...readers need to take the inquiries of newer (and especially younger members) more seriously and yes, answer their questions candidly and honestly. Despite how frequently these topics come up, we still have new visitors and members here weekly. We were all brand new here at one time. Navigating the older threads to a newcomer--seeking previous answers to these topics isn't always easy for a newcomer here. Heck. Even after all my time here, I still have difficulty getting a particular topic to come up!

What I'm sensing here myself, as "an oldtimer" since about 2001 or so, is that we have this tremendous influx of brand new arrivals who are here for more or less "a good time". They're here for less than serious purposes-- like viewing galleries, joking with one another, coming on to one another!It's quite the opposite to what the LPSG originally represented for many of us who joined years ago and helped pioneer the site to where it is now. Often, those of us who write candidly from real life experiences (and with our whole hearts behind our responses!) sign out of here each day left wondering "what's the use?". MY logic is disregarded anyway, so why bother? Often, our responses are followed by remarks close to hostility. While cyberspace might be one of the safer places to get into a fight (since we NEVER confront one another in person!), the experence around here sometimes becomes nonetheless unsettling. Emotionally draining. I'm sure some once very familiar screen-names around here have (over time) withdrawn their presence here from the mere mental exhaustion factor alone. And, it's kinda sad, you know? Another "good thing" gone bad.

My case in point is the absence of many of my fellow "old-timers" whom I believe did NOT originally join up for all the pix or the chat. We arrived here just glad to have a place to discuss personal sexual matters and offer encouragement and advice to one another for what had been a serious subject to us all our lives...living with a larger endowment. It's still a serious subject of course, but over the last number of years now, we can feel differently about our good fortune (or our bad, depending) because we did have those couple of years when the LPSG brought us good information. We did not have to sift through so much fluff and merriment in all the threads for us to get to the good stuff we came here for, the candid (useful, beneficial) dialogue. That dialogue is still here, occasionally. But one really has to "dig" for it these days.

I still check in here (obviously) :smile: from time to time and contribute as I can. But I really miss many of my ole buddies, some of whom still send me IMS occassionally and tell me too, that the LPSG isn't at all what it used to be. Obviously, those older members then, still "lurk". But, I wonder what we're missing... NOT ever reading answers from them like we used to!

It doesn't seem any of us have any quick remedies either to "fix things".

----One's suggestion to "fixing" surely would NOT appease everyone!

In thinking about this, the creation of a section titled "Charter Member Suite" (?) might allow for those members here (say, three years or longer) to stay together as a group. Entry into this special section (via Administrator/Moderator approval) would be reserved for those forum participants who have demonstrated over time sincerity, viablilty, and believability in their answers) This would establish a means to keep ole friends together and provide an avenue for their sage advice to be available to those who come to the LPSG for really legitimate reasons to learn and be encouraged....not necessarily just be entertained.

 

[rich-9.8]

It all seems to rub along ok for the most part. There are a lot of different people who have diverse opinions. It very rearely descends into insulting other users of flaming, unless of course you want to talk, religion, politics or race...

 

[naughty]

It all seems to rub along ok for the most part. There are a lot of different people who have diverse opinions. It very rearely descends into insulting other users of flaming, unless of course you want to talk, religion, politics or race...

I hope your opinion never changes...

 

[benderten2001]

"It all seems to rub along ok for the most part. There are a lot of different people who have diverse opinions. It very rearely descends into insulting other users of flaming, unless of course you want to talk, religion, politics or race... "

The administrator /moderators could flat out ban those discussions on religion, politics, and race. But then, THAT would forbid thoroughly discussing human sexuality to some degree because those areas DO affect that subject... inevitably.

 

[fortiesfun]

I urge people to respond to FAQs of a personal nature ("What are these little white bumps?", "If I only did it once, does that make me gay?", etc.) more compassionately, even if other LPSG members have asked these questions before.

Beating my regular drum, as well as my usual meat, I still think that a wiki area that addresses the predictable questions would do both old timers and new-comers a lot of good. It does get old being asked the same questions over again, but I've used the search function and know how useless it really is even when I am searching for something very specific that I know exists. The problem, however, is really that important information gets lost around here. The advantage of a wiki, even though it is not without the potential for disagreement about what it should contain, is that it doesn't get buried or ignored. It gets updated.

This is not an answer to all our problems, but honestly, I think it would greatly assist the "little white bumps" guys, the "how big is big?" guys, the "does once make you gay?" guys, the "what's the best condom?" guys and the rest of the posters who are hitting a question for the four hundredth time this week, while giving members with something constructive to say in answer to them a place to put that is worth their time.

PS: Also a long-time instructor. Honestly, I'm inclined to give original excuses a free pass, just because they are so rare.