The Rise of the Gay Dad

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by HellsKitchenmanNYC, Oct 30, 2009.

  1. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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  2. MercyfulFate

    MercyfulFate New Member

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    More adoption = Good.

    I can't understand the mindset of being against gays adopting, would you rather the children remain homeless?

    As someone who's adopted I can't condone that school of thought.
     
  3. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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    Kudos to you for finding a home. Was adoption painful for you? What age were u adopted? I'm sorry I just have a lot of questions about it. If I was an orphan I would love to be adopted and find a home, a family and have people love me and treat me like I was their own!
     
  4. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
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    Above all else what must prevail is the suitability of the potential foster parent/s to give the child a loving, stable kick start in life.

    Sexuality of the proposed foster parents is a non issue - or shouldn't be.
     
  5. MercyfulFate

    MercyfulFate New Member

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    I was adopted very young, only a couple of years old so I wasn't in foster homes or anything. Is it painful? Yeah, especially since my biological parents refuse to speak to me.
     
  6. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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    That's interesting. I'm wondering why it bothers you. Did you have a good family or are you itching to find the biological parents? Were the parents you had good to you? Sorry if I'm intruding I'm very curious about this. Did y'r bio paents tell you this and if so why aren't you hap[y w/the parents you had? I know it's probably a big bowl of not fun but I'm wondering how you feel!
     
  7. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    That's an astonishing article. I couldn't have imagined it possible only 20 years ago but then I couldn't imagine we'd elect a black president either. I really admire those couples.
     
  8. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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    Yeah it's great. I have a friend in LA that's jewish and adopted 2 black kids...sorry africa american. Now that's a mix. they're gonna have some issues but I hope it all works out...cultural..religious..but I bet those kids will be brought up knowing they are loved if I know this guy right.
    The world changes. I guess we no longer have homes for unwed mothers as we did in the 60s and I hope lots of ideaas of what a family is change too. It's just a shame that older...i.e.. 8 yr olds can't be adopted b/c people think a child that old can't become a real member of the family.
    Do you think people don't want to adopt older children b/c they think older kids could never BE part of the familt because of memories or being in a home or that it might be 'too late' to make them part of an adoptive family? I wonder.
     
  9. MercyfulFate

    MercyfulFate New Member

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    It's quite alright. No there was no issue with my parents (who adopted me) they're the best parents anyone could ask for.

    It's a need for closure I guess. I've never seen my biological parents and kind of want to know what they look like. I'm also very curious to see if I have any half-siblings too. There are vast differences between myself and my family that aren't just visual, there's also big personality differences too. I'd like to see why this is as well.

    I've contacted my biological parents and gotten one tiny letter back from my birthmother. She basically said a bunch of platitudes and wouldn't respond after that.

    I guess I'd really like to speak to them once at least and move on. For me at least it's been a black cloud hanging over my head my whole life. I know other adopted people who never want to meet their biological parents, and while I understand that thought, I still want to meet them once.
     
  10. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    The person I love most in the world is a gay dad.
     
  11. nudeyorker

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    Does his name rhyme with seven inch reader?
     
  12. B_Nick8

    B_Nick8 New Member

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    Yeah, that's it. :rolleyes:

    I'm in OH right now, and if my skin could crawl off my body because of that post, it would. Thanks, Nudey. I owe you one. :wink:
     
  13. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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    Yeah where is that breeder when we need some common sense now? Huh?!
     
  14. HellsKitchenmanNYC

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    I hope you can find some peace w/that..a place in yr heart that makes it ok. We all have alot of unanswered questions and that puts pitstops in yr way in life. I can't put myself in yr shoes nor you in mine and we probably wouldn't want each others problems but on this topic I hope you find solice in the fact that the parents that raised you loved you and that the family you have loves you. In the end we all just want to be loved by someone. I hope yr life is great tho and even w/those unaswered questions yr life is good!
    Be well and go forth!:biggrin1:
     
  15. Lex

    Lex
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    My husband and I are both biological fathers (5 kids between the two of us--ages 27 to 9). I admire gay men and women who adopt. Far too many children flounder in orphanages for years feeling unloved and unwanted--especially older children and children of color.

    People get blinded by their so-called morals and forget that one of the most fundamental gifts we can give children is the unconditional love of adults who care for and guide them.
     
    #15 Lex, Nov 1, 2009
    Last edited: Nov 1, 2009
  16. Pendlum

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    I really enjoyed that article. I even teared up about half way through it.
     
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