I agree with context being a major part. And of course who says it...... but mostly words don't bother me, I know who/what I am. I don't care what others think, cause most are always more willing to think the worst.
^ This. For a Sir or Ma'am etc who I submit to, I'm peachy with the word slut. If some random cunt-nugget called me a slut for no reason, there would be words, you may be sure... Context, baby.. context!
slov·en·ly (slvn-l)
adj.
1. Untidy, as in dress or appearance.
2. Marked by negligence; slipshod. See Synonyms at sloppy.
sloven·li·ness n.
sloven·ly adv.
The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition copyright ©2000 by Houghton Mifflin Company. Updated in 2009. Published by Houghton Mifflin Company. All rights reserved.
slovenly [ˈslʌvənlɪ]
adj
1. frequently or habitually unclean or untidy
2. negligent and careless; slipshod slovenly manners
adv
in a negligent or slovenly manner
slovenliness n
Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003
ThesaurusLegend: Synonyms Related Words Antonyms
Adj. 1. slovenly - negligent of neatness especially in dress and person; habitually dirty and unkempt; "filled the door with her frowzy bulk"; "frowzy white hair"; "slovenly appearance"
frowsy, frowzy
untidy - not neat and tidy; "careless and untidy in her personal habits"; "an untidy living room"; "untidy and casual about money"
Based on WordNet 3.0, Farlex clipart collection. © 2003-2011 Princeton University, Farlex Inc.
slovenly
adjective
1. untidy, disorderly, unkempt, slatternly He was gruff, slovenly, and given to brooding.
2. careless, sloppy (informal), negligent, slapdash, loose, slack, heedless, slipshod Such slovenly work is simply unacceptable.
I don't call women sluts, because it can offend, so unless I'm specifically told that it's something she likes to be called (at certain times) I wouldn't take it upon myself to suddenly start calling her that.
But the word itself actually elicits a positive response in me - it's something of a turn on to say, or even read. It doesn't have a negative connotation for me, as I don't view sexually active females as a negative thing.
In my experience, it is actually women that ostracize other women by calling them sluts, much more so than men. If a man calls a woman a slut with deliberate negative intent, it is usually indicative of some hurt she has caused him; e.g. sleeping around but not with him, or cheating on him when they were supposed to be committed. But women tend to label other girls as sluts more readily, in order to demean their worth in the group.
It seems to me that it is more the case that women, not men, oppress other women's sexuality, in order to retain the value of their own sexuality. If there is one female in a group who sleeps with all the boys, the social "worth" of female sexuality is devalued in the group - as males need to work less hard to get the sex they want - and this diminishes the power that ALL the females in that group have over the males. Therefore it is in the women's interest to oppress the sexuality of other women.
This study demonstrated exactly that phenomenon. That women respond in a more hostile manner towards females that are overtly sexual, than they do to more sexually modest women.
Study: Displaying cleavage, sexiness can alienate other women
In my experience, it is actually women that ostracize other women by calling them sluts, much more so than men. If a man calls a woman a slut with deliberate negative intent, it is usually indicative of some hurt she has caused him; i.e. sleeping around but not with him. But women tend to label other girls as sluts more readily, in order to demean their worth in the group.
The most intolerable to me was if one of the guys slept with a woman and then called her a slut the next day.
In this kind of instance, my feeling is that the guy in question was obviously bragging. Why else tell people about a sexual encounter? And in the house you are describing, it is most likely that he was bragging about this to other males, to gain respect in their eyes. So it sounds to me, that having slept with a slut is a kind of victory; I very much doubt that he was expressing shame or regret that he slept with a 'slut'. Of course, I'm reading all this with my own biases in tact, and over the internet; but does any of what I've said ring any truth?
No, they had double standards. That's the definition of a double standard.
They believe that men who sleep with women are studs and women who sleep with men are sluts. Guys right here on LPSG describe and defend that belief all the time. Surely you realize that this exists.
Didn't he say himself that he recognized that very double standard?
I think everyone in this thread would agree it exists, isn't nice and is far from fair. The only difference is that we have different experiences of who uses the term most frequently and how they use it!
<snip> I believe he's one of those guys who has a virgin/whore complex and it's kept him from being able to be happy. <snip>